Any help will be gratefully received.  I work full-time so my husband, who sadly died 3 weeks ago, was the main dog carer.  He was usually out for about 4 - 5 hours a day and our 2 dachshunds and GSD (19 months old) have pretty much been fine, except for the odd occasion when GSD has been destructive.  They were also left once in a while for longer than that. 

However, my GSD seems to have become very destructive just over the last few days even when I was just out for an hour or so today.  She has about 30 mins mixed road/off lead exercise early morning before I leave her which is about the amount she was used to before and I am hoping a dog walker I know will be able to give her an hour later each morning to break up the day - but she is away until the new year.  Confining to a limited area is not an option as our living space is open plan and they must be able to get to the garden.  Tomorrow I am off work but out for a couple of hours.  I have baked a cheese and mixer kong for her but fear my overweight dacshie girl (who is boss) will have that off her pretty quick so it isn't something I am happy doing long-term.  She is very easy going and laid back normally and hasn't showed any signs, until this destruction over the last few days, of grieving for my DH but I am wondering if she is now experiencing separation anxiety.  I would add that the dogs were with my husband when he died - certainly my youngest dachsie was very distressed but seems to have come to terms with it now.  I am really worried because I dearly want to keep her - she is such a wonderful dog and helps me socially a lot too.  But obviously I must consider what is best for her.

One very worried mum.

Louise

I hope people will put their thinking caps on and be able to offer you some suggestions Louise but I really just wanted to say how very sorry I am for your loss and then to have to deal with matters like this.  You must be reeling. 
The only suggestion I can make is to perhaps use a crate for the little dog so the GSD can enjoy her kong in peace but if you are intending to return to full time work I think you are going to need extra help such as a dog walker, sitter or doggie day care.   If all else fails I am sure yours is the type of situation that the Breed Rescue would do all they can to help.

i'm very sorry about your husband.

have you tried a DAP (dog appeasing pheromone) diffuser? you can get at PAH or the vets

Thanks the DAP might be an answer.  I know she has destroyed a few times before but not with regularity.  And of course I know this is not an ideal situation but I must do my best to make it work.  The dachsies are just fine but after today I am not convinced another long walk during the day is sufficient.  I do take Carly to obedience once a week - working for our KC gold and she is going to be doing ringcraft with me too another evening a week although I don't plan to show her. 

Louise my heart goes out to you, so sorry to hear about your husband.

I am afraid that i don't know what to suggest apart from would it be possible to call in an animal behavourist into your home to help you with some ideas?  If you know anyone that can recommend someone all the better. 

All the luck in the world and i hope that times get better x

My heart goes out to you Louise, you must be really going through it at the moment & I'm sure you'll get some great advice & support for these guys.  I'm sure the dogs were upset after your husband passed away, it must have been & possibly still is a confusing time for them, after all they will not understand why your husband is no longer around.  A stuffed Kong is a great way of keeping a dog entertained, I have to admit the idea od a dachshund taking anything from a GSD made me smile!! but crating the little ones does sound like a good idea if it means she gets her kong.  A dog will only be destructive out of boredom so a dog walker of some sort sounds like a great idea.  I'm sure you'll find a way to cope with all of this, you sound like a strong woman & I hope times become easier for you soon.

Oh Louise I am so very sorry to hear about the loss of your husband, you must be devastated.

I really haven't got much advice to give other than maybe your GSD is also grieving, a friend's husband died earlier this year and their golden was very much her husband's dog and it took him a few months to get back to his normal self, I'm not kidding you if you saw the boy at the time you could feel his sadness :(  Your girl could also be picking up on your sadness causing anxiety too.

Do you have or could you get a dog gate to seperate the two dogs while you are out?  That way you could give the GSD a kong without your other girl stealing it.

I hope you find a solution to your problem soon as it is the last thing you need at the moment.

Sending postive thoughts your way and hopefully your GSD will come out of this fairly soon.

 

Hello Louise,

I wanted to add my very sincere condolences on your husband's death. 

Dogs are often affected by loss in their human family and even the normally most well behaved and well adjusted can become stressed and act out of character.  Your GSD is of course still very young and so this in part will be contributing to the behaviour but it's worth acknowledging that it can be multiple things building up which have caused the destructive behaviour.

I'd opt for having the Dachs in a larger play pen if possible rather than a cage so that they and also the GSD can enjoy stuffed kongs etc without fear of one eating everything or protective behaviours.

I'd also recommend that you give each of the dogs or areas in which they are kept something of your own clothing which is worn and so smells of you.  That may give them some comfort to snuggle up with.

DAP collars and/or plug ins may be useful - the plug ins require to be on 24/7 within a reasonably confined area of the home where the dog(s) spend most time.  Collars would cover periods when separated and of course walks.  There are also DAP sprays which may be useful to apply to their bedding too.

Our pets also pick up a great deal from our own emotions and yours must be very fragile just now :(  It will take a long time for you to build any form of normality into life but I'd say don't try and hold back your emotions for your own sake first and foremost and, further down the line of priority, the dogs too.

As to exercise, tired minds often help relieve boredom better than tired bodies.  If you can give the dogs a mental workout a couple of times a day on top of what exercise you can currently provide this should help a lot.  Increasing only physical exercise to countermand a behaviour can actually make things worse as we build up the dog's stamina so it requires ever increasing exercise to remain calm and content - sometimes beyond what even the most energetic and dedicated owner could ever provide :)

I hope that something from this or other contributors helps a little.   

Prayers are being said for your strength of mind, body and spirit and that your husband's spirit is in a better place than us.
God bless, Teri x

So sorry for your loss and for all the added stress' you have right now. She could just be picking up on all the feelings that come with such a loss and so is feeling out of sorts herself because of it, hopefully she will settle again soon.

Im no expert but crate training would be an idea if you havent allready, there are lots of internet articles on it. If I didnt crate my Weim he would be naughty in my absence he gets bored and makes his own fun but in the crate he sleeps happy, I swap his kong at lunchtime and after a quick wee he dives in for round two.

Dap diffuser worth ago and bach remedies available from chemist are good too. You could try a few drops of star of bethlehem to help with the loss and trauma (for him and you) and you could add in rescue remedy too. Skullcap and valerian tablets are available online for calming and are homeopathic, very helpfull and might just help him readjust. Radio left on talking channel or an animal healing CD.

Finally at her age you could up the morning to one hour if you have the time, really leave her tired and sleepy, also could leave a tshirt that you have worn for some comfort smells. Oh and maybe get a reputable recommend dog person to have a visit and suggest things to help you through.

I hope that you manage to settle her again soon and that you can then have time to focus on your own loss and feelings.

Many thanks for all your replies. 

In fact I saw my vet today and as she is usually very laid back and placid we have decided to use a calmer for a couple of weeks then move to a DAP collar for a little longer.  I wouldn't want to keep her on meds much longer than that and will be using a higher dose and reducing over the two weeks. 

The dog walker is on holiday unfortunately and not back to 5 Jan but as she is used to GSDs (has one herself) I want to go with her (I used her for a short period with one of my other dogs).  That means the day will be broken up for Carly (and the others to a small extent).  I have also booked a visit from a recommended behaviourist in the new year but may postpone that for now and see how things go (£175 seems quite steep compared with the last behaviourist I used - but would be interested to know is that seems about right to others here).  I will get some star of bethelhem for us both.  But at the moment it still hasn't hit me - I guess I really expect John to come through the door anytime now but that is how I tend to deal with things and then by the time I realise something has really happened I am beginning to cope with it.

Because of the length of time crate training is not an option and to be honest I think she would pin if shut away from the other two.  Today I left her for a couple of shorter periods - about 20 mins and an hour.  Gave them all bones and then took them away when I got back.  Worked fine.  Maybe I am just panicing unncessarily but to rehome her would be just another trauma for me to deal with.

Louise

I have also booked a visit from a recommended behaviourist in the new year but may postpone that for now and see how things go (£175 seems quite steep compared with the last behaviourist I used - but would be interested to know is that seems about right to others here). 

Hi Louise  gosh that does sound a lot of money for the behaviourist!  The ones that i know  charge between £35 & £50 an hour.  I think it is a bit cheeky of them asking so much money and it then makes you think they are trying to make as much profit as possible.  I hope that everything works out for you and i pray that your friends & family rally round.  Hugs & kind thoughts x