27 months castrated Golden Retriever Dog (Sam)
9 month entire Golden Retriever Bitch (Phoebie)

I have been allowing their relationship to develop naturally - reinforcing Sams superiority if anything to date
I have watched for signs as to who will be pack leader. If Sam has a toy, Phoebie yaps at him and he gives it up to her. She frequently washes his ears. He warns her off his food and she won't try to go in his dish. Therefore I have mixed feelings as to who is leader between them but I am happy for them to decide the pecking order in time and I will take note of the order they settle on.

Tonight I was in the bath with both dogs in the bathroom with me (BIG bathroom). There was a slip lead on the bathroom floor that Phoebie settled down near. After a while I realised Sam was edgy for some reason - I then noticed Phoebie was occasionally doing short low growls in his direction if he moved (not even in her direction). She was guarding the lead for some reason. I called hubby upstairs and he took the rope (she gave it up with no problem as they both know we are higher ranking than either of them). After a few minutes he gave it to Sam to carry. She then didn't try to get it off him or yap at him as usual.
I know her hormones are haywire at the minute (day 18 of season) but a similar thing happened when she was about 5 months old over a slip lead on the floor of the workshop she decided to guard.

We don't usually have slip leads lying around the floor (despite me hating housework lol) and they happily play tug with toys usually and share fine. We have a number of gundog slips that are used on either or although Phoebie has one on more often than Sam as he heels like glue so doesn't wear one when I go to shut the gates whereas she does as I don't trust her enough.

I am sorry this is so long but trying to give all facts that may be relevent ;)

Anyway - what I am getting round to asking is how far do I let them argue while they sort out the order? Should we have kept right out of it tonight or were we right to show her our displeasure at her behaviour? Do I step in at the first signs of an argument or do I allow warning growls and only stop it if it looks like it will go further?

Sara :)

Sara, as she is a woman now she is more than likley to take the top rung and put poor Sam in his place. I would not interfere unless you think they are going over the top. Make sure she stops when she has placed heself over Sam and does not start on you or your partner. Enough is enough, and as long as you remain above her you should be able to control things with your voice. Have re-read your post and yes I would have picked up the lead but not otherwise intervened, the quicker they sort it out the better and although he is castrated I would not expect it to lead to a fight, even if it sounds like it, he will back down. All the best Jackie

Elli my only bitch and by far the smallist of my hounds, is in charge as far as the dogs are concerened, only wish I could control them as easy as she does with just one look

Thanks Jackie

I've been expecting her to end up "top dog" in time and it now looks like we are starting to go that way. I'm happy enough about that (Poor Sam) and as yet "voice" is all that has been needed to control them both.

I'd have understood the situation more if he had tried to take something from her and then I'd have let them sort it out (I'm sure Sam would back down) but it was the fact he was about 8 foot from her and if he moved a muscle she grumbled. Just seemed a bit unfair at the time :( The poor lad appeared to be looking everywhere but at her and almost whistling innocently if you see what I mean. I may well have missed a look or something between them before that though.

Oh well - I'll keep an eye out and monitor. I'm very aware that intervention by me to help the underdog would just confuse the natural order yet I don't want her to decide he has to sit in the corner of the room and not move each evening ;)

Thanks for the prompt reply :D I'll shout if I need more advice.

Sara :)

Sounds like she has already got it sorted Sara, she can control him at a distance and there should be no need for anything else than a warning growl and the look, mind you he may have to be put in his place a bit more forceably every now and again. ;) You now how we women do it. Ja:)kie