Hi there everyone, I haven't been on this fab site for a while, cos iv been trying to get my small grooming business off the ground, it's so hard trying to get work in, but im plugging away.....

This 3 BIG problems I have so I hope someone can PLEASE help me!!!!!.  My lovely Newf 'Ralph' is nearly 7 months, and we love him loads.  we are finding really hard living with him, and it is causing awful rows with MOH.  Firstly, he will not let you stroke him on the head as he just 'goes for you', he's just done this at my 8 year old son and caused blood, he was chewing a bone at the time tho'! but he's always like that even if he's not eating or chewing anything, he will NOT let you stroke his head as he just 'mouths' you all the time, can anyone tell me WHY does he do this??

2nd problem:  I feed him 200 x 3 a day high protine food (what the breeder and other newy owners have done).  Now I know they are thieves in every sense, but I can honestly say, he is terrible, he goes to extreme lengths to get food, this morning, I made toast for my 2 young ones, just turned to give them the plate it was on, and he lunged on the worktop and pinched the whole block of butter, before I could get it off him, he's ate 3/4 of it, I simply cried and my OH just walked away in disgust! I was worrying more about what it may do to him.  I simply just can not leave a crumb out, and if the kids are walking past with something in their hand, he'll have it out of their hands!, it's just awful I have tried everything, he goes to classes each week, he has as 'dogmatic' collar on when we go out and I do my training, we always have him in the house but can't sit on the floor as he'll just 'dominate' whoever is on the floor.  He tries to open drawers and tries to open the fridge.  I am so upset, as I can't talk to my OH as he is just fed up with him..

Can anyone tell me if they have a newf what and how much do they feed him as he grows and any answers to what iv 'talked' about.

The 3rd one, is when im out walking, he lunges to whoever walks past me.  I got a right mouthful this morning when a woman walked past with her (about) 3 year old, he lunged at her and I just managed to stop him, I had the halti - dogmatic collar and lead on, and I also have treats in my pocket and I saw this woman coming towards me I enticed him with the treats but it was a waste of time.  I cried going home as I was so very upset, I had to walk away from my house whilst I got myself together as my OH would have gone mad!!!,

We all waited so long for Ralph, but I DO NOT want to get rid of him and I wont... I don't know what to do, I am so upset, and I can't show this to my family, I keep saying to them "he's only 7 months, he'll stop him, it's a puppy thing" but deep down, I am so, so upset I can't stop him doing these things.  My OH has (to be honest) had enough of him but he said he's 'putting up' with him because of me, so that's why I am trying my hardest at the classes and training him in my walks with him.

It is going for my 2 children what has upset him (and I don't usually stick up for him!) and just robbing any food around but I know what he means, I am so fed up with it and I am losing sleep over it!!!

I am so very sorry for this sad tale of affair but I know you guys are great with your wonderful advice, so can anyone give me hope and guidence in this awful time, we have to very sadly put him in the garden now to stop him from dominating, robbing food and mouthing, it's awful I know but I don't know what to do, I cry all the time as I am now lost!!!!

kindest regards to you and thank you very much for reading this

Debi
Liverpool
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Hi everyone, I forgot to mention, this is my 3rd Newf, so im used to the breed and have shown them and now possibly showing my Ralph.  This newf is nothing like the other 2 I had, so I honestly don't know why he's like this!!!!!!!!!!!! I just thought id mention im used to the breed as he is very large as you know...

Hi Debi :-)

I am sorry to hear that you are still having the same problems with Ralph.  You really sound like you are at the end of your tether and it can't help that you don't even have any support from the rest of the family...and I think this lack of support, particulalry from your OH, is a major contributing factor to your current situation, unfortunately.

Ralph really does sound like a very normal pup (albeit a big one) but, from the tone of your post, I think you have lost all confidence in your own ability with him and for that reason, I'm not sure how much use any tips or ideas we could give would be to you.  Others may disagree but  the only way I personally feel you might regain your confidence with Ralph is to employ the services of a very good trainer who can come to your house, see how you live and how Ralph interacts with the world and can show you how to put training into practice with him.  Please check out http://www.apdt.co.uk/ for details of trainers in your area.

Things as they are now are not fair on you or Ralph.  I'd make that call sooner rather than later ;-)  Also, if you haven't already done so, please contact Ralph's breeder.  Presuming that they are experienced, they may well have encountered such behaviour in their own youngsters over the years and might be able to offer some words of wisdom :-)

Very best of luck :-)

Jules

I have never had a Newfie, but I know what you are going through, Buster has been a handfull but has never showed any agression or food-guarding.

I'm sure you know that if this behaviour isn't stopped it will get worse and worse. It sounds like your boy is very strong-willed, knows he's big and strong and knows he can use his size & weight to his advantage!

I've been through the food-stealing with Buster, all of a sudden one day he pushed ME (I am the one he always listens to!!) out of the way as his head appeared on the work-top and he grabbed a slice of bread, over the next few days he got worse and worse (I'm assuming the fact his fist attempt was succesfull spurred him on!) to the point I had to shut him out of the kitchen if food was being prepared, before this he would lay down paying no attention.

What worked for me re the food-stealing - ensure the dog was never left around food without me present.
I refused to keep him shut out of the kitchen while I was preparing food as to me that seemed like avoidning the issue, so I started giving him his knong with something xtra tasty in while I was busy preparing food. It did mean I had to have eyes in the back of my head as if he thought I wasn't paying attention he would try to steal the food, if that happened he would be shut out of the kitchen for a few mins & then let back in.
When he would reliably occupy himself with the kong while I was preparing food, I then progressed to leaving the kong on the side for a few minutes before giving it to him (he was fucused on waiting for the kong, not the food I was preparing).
I then made him wait longer and longer each day until he nolonger gets a kong, he gets a treat for laying down and ignoring the food I'm preparing, now it's got to the stage that he can't be bothered to wait for a little treat so most of the time he doesn't even bother to come in the kitchen while I'm cooking.

As for stealing off of people in the livingroom - he never gets left with the children if they have food, apart from this if he cant lay down nicely he gets shut in a different room, he soon learnt that it's better for him to control himself. He never gets given food of anybodies plates EVER, if there is some suitable left overs I will put them in his bowl after we've all finished.

>Firstly, he will not let you stroke him on the head as he just 'goes for you', he's just done this at my 8 year old son and caused blood, he was chewing a bone at the time tho'! but he's always like that even if he's not eating or chewing anything

Don't let your children near the dog when he's eating anything (this isn't a method to help fix the problem but it will keep your children safe). Personally I wouldn't let him have a bone if he's guarding, I aslo wouldn't feed a high-protein diet, but this is a desicion you need to make for yourself.
As this seems to be linked with his head being touched I think it wise for you to get him checked by the vet, hearing/eyesight problems need to ruled out (as well as many other potential causes) as these could easily make him feel vulnerable.
After medical issues have been ruled out I think you need a behaviourist, these problems can be sorted out but it's best to get advice from somebody who can see for thierself whats happeing and has the experience to give you the correct advice.

To me it sounds like a stong-willed youngster that needs some consistency, I'm not saying that you are not putting in the effort with his training, but when you have a strong willed, huge dog, you need to find a way to stay confident (they know when you aren't and will take advantage), calm and in control, you aslo need to make sure that you are controlling him with your mind rather than with physical strength - ie, plan-ahead, entice the behaviour you want etc.. rather than result to dragging him by his coller or pushing him down when he jumps up at the table.

The best exapmle I can think of with this is Buster didn't want to come back from a walk the other day - he found a smell he wanted to follow, I gave a little tug on his lead and said 'come' - he planted his feet into the ground and actually started to walk backwards - pulling me with him. My dad was with me and offered to help me pull him away from the smell, I refused and told him that I can't rely on  pysical force to control him or he will learn to use his strength agaisnt me, so I got out a piece of cheese and wafted it under his nose - nothing, he didn't care, so I made that piece of cheese do the highland fling infront of his nose and made all sorts of stupid high pithced noised, he relented - the cheese was now far too temping and he gave up his protest and followed me. I made it a battle of wills - my will is much stronger than his so I know I can win that way everytime, he may be a very strong dog, but he is only a dog, therfore i can out-think him :)

Your Newfie is not a lost cause, but it would be a very good idea to get some proffesional help here.

> Others may disagree but  the only way I personally feel you might regain your confidence with Ralph is to employ the services of a very good trainer who can come to your house, see how you live and how Ralph interacts with the world and can show you how to put training into practice with him

I totally agree with you. Seeing how my dog has responded so differently to me and my OH has really highlighted the importance of confidence. Buster is great for me, but while my OH lacked confidence Buster was a handfull for him, my OH has confidence now and is finally enjoying having Buster the big lump with us :)

> To me it sounds like a stong-willed youngster that needs some consistency, I'm not saying that you are not putting in the effort with his training, but when you have a strong willed, huge dog, you need to find a way to stay confident (they know when you aren't and will take advantage), calm and in control, you aslo need to make sure that you are controlling him with your mind rather than with physical strength - ie, plan-ahead, entice the behaviour you want etc.. rather than result to dragging him by his coller or pushing him down when he jumps up at the table.
>

Google NILIF, the system (Nothing In Life Is Free) is a very good non conforntational way to gain control.

Everyone else has given lots of good advice so I will just comment on one thing -the head touching. Did you touch his head frequently when he was smaller, so he got used to it? I find in my breed the dogs become very headshy if not having their heads stroked on a daily basis from virtually birth, so I wondered if it perhaps is a fear/dislike that lies beneath this behaviour? My male dog was returned to me aged 18 months and his owner had not kept up with the head touching, so he is head shy. He used to back away from judges at shows, will not let strangers touch his head and don't even like US doing it. However we have worked and worked with him and found that if we offer a treat and at the same time as he eats from the hand, we stroke the head with the other hand, then keep doing it, giving more treats etc, he gets de-sensitized and will allow his head to be stroked. We're the people seen outside the ring stroking the dog's head a hundred times before he goes in, so he will let the judge do it! His sister however LOVES having her head touched as she's had it done all her life. Personally I think it all has to do with the eyes -when the hand comes up towards the head the eyes are nearby and some dogs just don't like anything near their eyes.

Sorry to hear you are struggling with your pup.
Lots of others on here have gone through problems with their dog at this age and come out the other side (as have I), so I am sure you will too.
I am sure a good behaviourist will help you sort this out, but in the meantime the advice about NILIF is very good, to make your pup work for everything he wants, not to expect it all 'for free'.
For food stealing, I would make sure he doesn't get the chance.
He is big, and seems to steal from everyone so i would make him lie down outside the room where the food is being eaten, it is good if he can still see it, so he learns he is not allowed in while you are eating, so to begin you could use a gate of some sort, until he will learn to just lie down there quietly while you eat/prepare food.
A toy to chew (eg a kong) while he is waiting would be good for him to be distracted from the food, and then you can give him a little food when you have finished eating, either scrape some leftover into his bowl (if anything suitable for him), or give him some of his own food, as a reward for waiting for you to finish.

Your Ralph sounds very much like my own 5 month old puppy. Hugo doesn't guard food and isn't head shy but he is a big boy and I understand how much work they can be.  I think that part of the problem is that when you have a large pup it makes the problem feel so much bigger than it is.  If a pup jumps up mouthing and he reaches your knees it is much easier to calmly deal with than if his paws are by your ears.

My boy would lunge at people if I let him. He thinks the whole world wants to play with him and struggles to control himself when excited. I have found the command 'watch me' really useful. What I do is to make him sit when we see someone approaching and have him watch me, I give lots of quiet praise and treats while he does this and I keep it up until they have passed. It quite time consuming but Hugo is so much calmer now and I see improvements daily, he even often manages to watch me without stopping now.

Try not to let other people upset you. Big dogs can be intimidating for people and they often don't see them as excitable puppies, just large unruly dogs.
He is still a puppy and some test the boundaries more than others, but with training and time it will get better. It can be hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when you're feeling down and I think as already suggested a trainer could be really helpful if only to give you some confidence back.  
I hope things improve for you soon.

not much to add although he does sound like a normal teenager and steeling food sounds normal for his size- he feels its there so its his! keep him out of the kitchen! being head shy is a typical dominant dog- he is obv the leader and i agree a trainer is the best thing to put him back down to bottom of the pack

Hi

My newfi is now 4 years old but he did go through a stroppy stage :)
He was very defiant and stubborn at times. I kept him a classes until he achevied his GC gold and had to be very firm with him at home. Definate boundaries needed to be set  and could not be negotiated at any time. It is very hard when those big brown eyes are trying to melt your heart :) Stay firm and inform the family that they must also be firm and fair. My boy is particuarly dim so I never expected an immediate responce to a command, but had to be very patient with him. He is now the best behaved dog I have ever had the pleasure to live with.
Believe in your abilities and your confidence will return and the fluff ball will stop taking advantage of you.
Good luck :)  

He sounds like a normal puppy to me too :)  but you must NOT let your children stroke him when he is eating, your children need to respect that when he is eating they leave him alone, they shouldn't stroke him when he eats, if they won't stop then you need to feed him away from the children.  It is his food and he doesn't know whether the children are going to take it from him, so he isn't letting them. 

He obvoiously does need training and the advice you have had on this thread is good advice about training and contacting the breeder too.

Taking the butter from the worksurface is also something that is quite normal with dogs that can reach, so until he you have trained him and you can trust him, don't leave temptation around.

Lunging at passers by is also normal for some young dogs and it might be worth investing in a halti harness not the one that goes over the nose but the one that fastens around him, this will give you more control.

Good luck and don't give up, I went through a lot more than you have mentioned with one of my dogs, but now he is almost 3 and although he has his moments, most of the time he is quite well behaved :)