I am currently researching getting a puppy either this summer or next year which both me and my partner are excited about as this is our dream breed.  My problem now is that my son accidently found out about this and he is not happy and has been arguing with me about it since yesterday saying it is such a bad idea. He is 14 nearly 15 and really in the teenage stage of doing everything his own way and really does not get involved in family life much preferring computer/playstation.  We currently have a GSD 3 years old which he pays little attention to does not walk or feed etc. He says the reason he does not want another dog is that i may rehome it if things go wrong as has actually happened twice in the past but which i felt was fairer on the dog as circumstances were not right.  These were very hard decisions at the time and not taken easily and i still think about the dogs and hope they are ok.  But things have changed now and I don't think this will happen again.  Then he says things like why can't we rehome our current dog and just get the new one There is no way she is going anywhere though.  My question really is should i definately be putting off getting new pup or as my partner says just ignore him and go ahead anyway.  He is not even asked to do anything for the dogs anyway and I just think he is being selfish but I'm worried breeders do not see it that way.  I know it is best and in ideal world everyone should be equally keen but maybe he will just come around when pup arrives?  Thoughts and suggestions please.

Firstly has a any realy valid objection?  Is he perhaps afraid of dogs?  If so I would tackle this aspect, take him along to a training class and get him to meet puppies and dogs, especially of the breed you want to get.

I would point out that he is now starting to become independent with his own interests,a nd you are entitled to yours.  After all the dog will hopefully be around long past the time he leaves home, goes to Uni etc.

I had the you love the dogs more than me from my teen girl, but now at 19 she accepts that shew has her won life and I am entitled t have something of my won that doesn't revolve around her.

At your sons age I think children reach their most selfish.  Parents should not restrict or inconvenience them in any way, but always must be at their beck and call and take them here and there, and have a meal ready just when they want one.

I have as nearly 16 year old son and the now sensible 19 year old who was hell on wheels from 13 to 16.

I always like to make sure that all family members are happy to take on a dog.
Not knowing yourself and your son, your son maybe just worried that the new dog may not last for long before it is rehomed.
You need to be 100per cent sure that you have the time, patiences and love for a new pup before taking on this responsibility.
Pups need constant care and attention, feeding four times a day to begin with on a routine basis and need house training so that they learn to go in the right place.
You are the one that really knows why you had to rehome the dogs in the past, so depending on why that was, you need to think hard before making a decision. Puppies are like children they need company, love and patience.

I agree with Gemini your son has probably seen this as you state before and may not want to bond with a pup for fear of it being rehomed again as for the comment of replacing the older dog for a puppy i can imagine that as a sarcastic comment ;) Do you expect him to help with the new puppy? he may think when say you go to work/shopping  it will be his responsibility to help with housetraining and he may just not want to do that..

Hes at an age where you can include him within the aspects of pet care which he probably knows this and doesnt want the responsibility.. (think of it like having a little brother to keep amused while mum has a bath :rolleyes:)

I agree with Gemini05's comments.  We cannot really judge here because none of us know all the circumstances.  Like many breeders if you came to be vetted for a puppy I would expect you to bring all the family and I would ask about dogs you have owned in the past and the outcomes of that.  Only you can say how comfortable you would feel in those circumstances that you would pass the vetting.  If you feel you would not pass I would suggest you think again as it would be nobodies interest to proceed.

I wouldn't home a puppy with a family where anyone of them wasn't 100% enthusiastic to have the puppy.  To my my puppy would be in a vulnerable situation and I wouldn't risk it.

I would also want to know in great detail (I'm not asking you now.:) ) why TWO other dogs that you've had were rehomed and I would take a great deal of convincing that you were a secure and permanent home for MY puppy. :)

From the bare bones of information that you've given so far, I wouldn't let one of my pups come to live in your home, whether you wanted one or not.

Oh well thanks for that Val you really do know how to crush a person's dream.  I suppose that's as it should be pup comes first. My son was not being sarcastic when he said rehome the dog we already have that is how little he cares for it. Thanks very much for your comments Brainless they had got me quite hopeful but never mind such is life.

Having now read your previous posts

June 2005 2 x GSD dog pups
August 2006 Westie pup
November 2006 new GSD pup
January 2007 2.5 year old GDS bitch

and now looking for another puppy, maybe it's time to give up dreaming and get real? :rolleyes:

Oh dear seems to me the son actually had a point and comes across as the sensible one :rolleyes:

It hurts children deeply when dogs are rehomed.  When I was 10 we had a springer who was my constant companion.  She had to be rehomed as my mother had cancer.  30 years on I still think often about Lady. 

Sorry to say but alot of breeders will not home a puppy unless the whole family is happy with the idea.  Nor will they like the idea that you have re-homed dogs in the past unless of course it's exceptional, unavoidable circumstances!

Maybe you shoudl talk to your son about it more.  I could see him rebeling against you even more as you tried to keep it a secret from him.  Although it will be yours and your husbands dog your son is part of the family so should be allowed a (small) say in the matter.

If for some reason your previous dogs were re-homed for unforseen circumstances then it might be easier but talk to your son, try and convince him that another dog will be ok.  Also does he like/dislike the breed you are going to be getting?  Has he had any bad experiance in the past with dogs?  Has he peer pressure from friends about the dogs? (If his friends don't own dogs maybe a doggy smell is on his clothes and has dog hair on the clothes and so gets the micky taken abit?  I've never personally had this but a friend has, one of her friends one told me she always smelt of dog on her clothes and it wasn't plesent.  I could never notice it but non dog people will.)

'Oh well thanks for that Val you really do know how to crush a person's dream'

I don't think Val was trying to crush anybodies dream - she was just being responsible.  It takes responsibilty to breed and own dogs.  I agree with her entirely.

I agree with Val too, and I can see why the lad makes the comments he does. Kids become attached to animals, and it hurts when they have to go under normal circumstances (illness, etc) he won't want to bond with a new puppy in case it gets moved out again. The comment regarding the other dog is simply a kick out at the situation. I would spend more time with him, lure him off the isolation of his pc, and help him with his choices for schoolwork/exams/SATS, as well as trips out and having fun, and maybe think about another dog in a few years time.

Don't let YOUR dream become their nightmare........

>June 2005 2 x GSD dog pups August 2006 Westie pup November 2006 new GSD pup January 2007 2.5 year old GSD bitch<

so the westie has gone that you had only 5 months ago, and the gsd has gone that you had only 3 months ago. You've now only got a 3yr old, (as stated in OP) and not the 2 1/2 yr old you had in January nor the 2 pups you had in June 05 which would be 21 months old now?
I'd concentrate on the dog you have left and not think about getting any more :( maybe your son has a point.

ok cheers everyone enough info there for me digest over the coming years while i concentrate on current dog which is2.5/3years whatever age the same dog as mentioned in jan 05 or when ever was mentioned by you kind ppl.   you can stop posting your comments while i work on my mothering skills which i'm sure are lacking along with the dog ones.  2 of those dogs raked up from the past are sadly no longer with us either as in dead.   but i'm sure that is my fault aswell can i request this thread to be locked as i no longer wish anyone to comment on what they know nothing about

while i work on my mothering skills which i'm sure are lacking along with the dog ones

Excellent decision.  I agree and support you in that. :)

I'm sorry if you feel people are being unkind, but you did ask for people's opinions and they can only base those on the information you've given now and in the past aishling.  I think you posted because you hoped that people would say 'yes, never mind what your son says, get another dog anyway', but often we don't get what we want to hear, just some sound advice. :)  Whether you take that or not, you can't really blame people for giving it.  

Hi

Sorry but you give us half the information, had to rehome through no fault of your own now they are dead. You really must of had some bad luck in the past. I get the impression  your son knows you better than you know yourself. What did happen to the westie and GSD pup you had at the same time not so long ago. Did you still have the older GSD then as you make no mention of having 3 dogs at the same time.

Listen to your son.

Wendy

>ok cheers everyone enough info there for me digest over the coming years while i concentrate on current dog which is2.5/3years whatever age the same dog as mentioned in jan 05 or when ever was mentioned by you kind ppl.   you can stop posting your comments while i work on my mothering skills which i'm sure are lacking along with the dog ones.  2 of those dogs raked up from the past are sadly no longer with us either as in dead.   but i'm sure that is my fault aswell can i request this thread to be locked as i no longer wish anyone to comment on what they know nothing about<

Aishling, sorry but when you told us about getting the 2 puppy gsd's in June 06 you never mentioned you already had a dog, not that you had to of course. (that would be the 2 1/2 - 3 yr old?) and I take it you've lost them puppies now :( and the westie, and the other gsd puppy from november :(  (That's August and November 06)
Maybe your son is sad at this loss too and maybe he can't cope with losing any more :(
We may not know much about you, we may not know all the details, but we do know what we've read :(

I'm so sorry to hear that two of your dogs have died recently. They were very young to die, so I can only assume their deaths were caused by accident or illness. :( Please don't think me insensitive, but if they died through illness it might not be wise to get another puppy yet anyway because some diseases can linger in the environment for a long time and it might not yet be safe. Your son is right - now is not the best time to get a puppy.

Where has anyone said you have poor mothering skills and I'm sure no-one believes the death of your dogs was your fault but maybe remember your son is part of your family aswell and will have to live with the dogs.

Surely you can't say we know noting, you suplied everyone with information you wished us to comment about.  Thats exactly what happend.  People have made assumptioins but have said them as assumptions as you did not supply some detail and looked at all points of view.

i thing the son is deeply upset by what has gone before and far from being insensitive it is quite the opposite. He just has a teenagers way with words.he cannot go through it again and is trying to tell you that in his own way.listen to him.