A golden retriever (a Ms Roxy Noodle Peters, Carlton Notts) nearly lost her life today, at the hands of her ever patient and loving owner - a Mrs Peters,of the same abode...

Onlookers were astonished to see that the Dog who up until approximately 9.29am had behaved 'impeccably' -  earning her treats through coming back on what seemed to be the first call, suddenly 'turned' into an unruly and wild hooligan. One onlooker - Mr Disgruntled from Mansfield - said "It was disgusting. There was no controlling the animal - I feared for my life". Reports are starting to come in describing the abject chaos involving sticks, old bones snuffled from the floor and an implicit ignorance of a magnitude not previously seen.

After a long and merry dance Ms R N Peters finally approached her owner who was said to be 'at the end of her tether' and said after the incident "It look every last shred of energy in my body not drop kick her back to Boston, Lincs, and shower her with praise through the most gritted teeth I've ever had".

Neighbours of the kindly owner talked of the air turning blue, which has yet to clear.

Ms R N Peters declined to comment, but is said to be 'upset and distraught' that there'll be no free running for the foreseeable future.

:D :D

Oh dear Ms Roxy Noodle is in the bad books :D :D

I had an incident yesterday as Moose who is 5 and should know better :rolleyes: decided that she was going to meet and greet a chap in the far distance. She was running at full pelt and I noticed there was no dog with the chap but he had a baby carrier on She was covered in mud and had that look of I wonder what he will look like with two great big muddy paws on his shoulders I screamed at her to come so loudly that I wet myself :D :D :D

She stopped and did an about turn and hurtled back to me :D :D

:D :D :D  Passing the Tena Ladies to Lucy.......

It has been known for the Lady of This House to be overheard, saying in the silliest, cooing voice that once uses to lavish praise upon a good dog who is doing All She is Told to do

"who's the most wicked little bi**ch in the whole country?   Who deserves to be skinned alive?

"Who's going to make a luvverly pair of aussie/lab skin slippers then?"   :D :D :D

Golfers have been known to comment :D :D

Margot

> shower her with praise through the most gritted teeth I've ever had

LOL - got the tee-shirt too :D :D :D

Daisy

I've given such a strong command that I spat my plate with a false tooth out :D

> I've given such a strong command that I spat my plate with a false tooth out

Can I borrow some of your Tena Lady, Margot ???? Thanks :D :D :D

Daisy