We live in a semi and have not really spoken to our neighbours for a couple of years (mainly because they made a few too many very rascist comments which, quite honestly, we didn't want to listen to).  Anyway a long ladder has been propped against the back of their house for a couple of weeks and, on Thursday night, it fell over across their fence taking one of our downpipes with it.  The pipe is attached about half way down the house wall but there is now nothing from the gutter to this.  The neighbour has removed the ladder but left the downpipe as it is.  I don't really know what to do about this, he is obviously liable but I don't think he is going to offer to do anything.  Would you approach him or, under the circumstances, just get it fixed and say nothing.  As we are attached I don't really want to make relations worse but do feel that we shouldn't have to fork out for repairs.
Any views would be welcome!!

There are a few people out there that are rascist,and to be honest they dont know what they are missing.I have friends aswell as relations that are multi rascial.Its their loss,not yours.If i were you,i think i would wait till i knew they were out and maybe post a letter through their door explaining that you know it was an accidnt but you would like them to help pay for the repairs.That way you dont have to get confrontational and face them.I would like to know how you get on with the situation and i wish you the best of luck.
ps........imo,its only the uneducated that discriminate about colour,race or creed,due to their  lack of comprehention.

How stupid to leave a ladder up against a house anyway.  Blatent invitation to burglars.

I would ask them politely if they would fix the downpipe dislodged by their ladder.  They can say no but I can't see how they could take offence to you asking.  Perhaps they think you didn't realise it was the ladder that caused the damage.  If it was me I would approach them in a way that was non-confrontational such as stating what a pity the ladder fell the way it did blah blah, could they come round and just fix the downpipe back in.

If you don't ask them it might send signals that you are intimidated by them

I would pop round and see them. Mention that when their ladder fell it caused damage to the drainpipe, say something like "You probably didn't notice, but when it fell .........".
Is the damage really bad ?. If not, maybe ask if they would help you mend it. I doubt very much if they will offer to pay, but the fact that they obviously have a ladder perhaps they will be willing to help you.
Of course, if it is an expensive job you may have to rethink this but otherwise it might help keep things on a 'friendlier' note.

Val

I would also go and see them face to face.  Some people get very angry if people don't talk face to face to them.  Of course if they refuse to pay you could always see if your house insurance company will chase them up.

I would just fix it and say nothing.  If they aren't very nice people, you won't get anywhere with them, they obviously know that their ladder has caused the damage and have done nothing so what is the point in confronting them?  All you will succeed in doing is getting yourself more upset!  'What goes around comes around'......you'll have your day!!

That happenned to me recently. I am waiting for my neighbour to come round and ask me about it.

by Oldilocks.  Why shouldn't they ask them nicely to fix it if they broke it?

I think that the said neighbours don't sound too nice or they would have come clean about the damage and volunteered help.  It seems that Treacle has been upset by them in the past otherwise she/he would not have felt the need to ask for our opinions as to what to do.  Call me an ostrich if you like but some people are just best left alone if you want a quiet life!   :)  I have never had trouble with neighbours myself so maybe I am not the person to make a comment!!

Thanks for your input, I am still undecided what to do.  They are not nice people (it's a father and a son in his mid-twenties) which is why we have as little as possible to do with them - the six year old grandson who comes to visit once a week has thrown a pair of scissors over the fence and knows more four-letter words than I do - most of which are directed at us when we're in the garden.  They do, however, both work full-time, so we don't see a lot of them and I am well aware it could be worse.  I am sure they saw the damage, it was quite obvious.  I am only really worried about getting it sorted quickly as it's winter and we are likely to get bad weather.  I will have a think over night and let you know what I'll do but I do appreciate all suggestions you've made.
Best wishes.

I suppose it all depends on the sort of person you are as well.   If you really don't like confronting people then it's probably best just to do the work yourself and save yourself the stress.  I have had difficult neighbours in the past and not just one or two.  I can face up to people very easily if I know I've been wronged and have done so on a few occasions.  We are all different so you have to do what's right for you.

I dont like to confront people either but there does come a time when enough is enough.A family that have a child so young that uses abusive language is just nasty.Give them a bar of soap for christmas and maybe they can use it on the childs mouth.It sounds like you just cant win with people like that.No wonder alot of us have pets,they are better company than many humans.Our next door neighbour poisoned our cat once,he stated that the cat was eating the goldfish from his pond.I charged him with the vets bill for our cat of course then told him a great place to get a cat net to go over the pond.I also said that if he EVER harmed another of my pets he would be sorry,but that was  the anger in me when i saw my poor kitty writhing in angony.
He never did do anything nasty again.

After going through what I went through with my ex next door neighbours even nice confrontations isn't worth it!  They broke into my house, wrecked it and nearly ruined my life and ruined two of my dogs lives, one of which will never be able to be trusted with men or children again.  If it's only slight damage in my eyes it's just not worth it.

Unfortunately this is the sad fact of many people these days in this country!!

Hi Treacle, quite honestly if a ladder had been put up agains the back of their house for a couple of weeks I would have spoken before now as I would be concerned about safety and security.

It may be that your neighbours have not noticed your down pipe.

TBH I would always approach a neighbour and mention something and hope that we could sort things out amicably.  Also the longer you leave it , it is just your word against theirs.

HAve you estimated how much reparing this down pipe would be and have you discussed this with your insurance company>

If it is over your excess why not leave the insurance company to sort it out, that is what they exist for.

There is also another way of looking at this, also have friends and family of mixed race, so people that are racial i wouldn't give time or day to, point 1 it depends on how stronge you are to go around there, as they have been racist in the past and could see this as another reason to have ago. these typ of people don't always see reason. point 2 i do believe that  damage has been done by another then they should put towards the cost or pay for it out right. i.e neighbours kid broke wring mirror father paid for it

Thanks for all the input.  We have decided to mend the pipe ourselves but my partner is going to ask if we can borrow the ladder (we don't have one) to enable us to do this.  We are hoping this will prompt an offer of reimbursement but I won't hold my breath.  I know this is a bit lame but I really can't face confrontation.  I hadn't thought of insurance though and will give them a ring.  May be moving soon, preferably to somewhere with no close neighbours - well we can dream!!
Thanks again.

I feel for you here as we have had neighbours from hell too, and my friend is currently going through hell with her neighbours - some people should just be removed from the human race   I'd just like to offer one bit of advice though, if you are planning to sell don't forget that it anyone asks, be it buyer, solicitor or even estate agent, if there has been ANY confrontation with the neighbours you have to tell them the truth - so if I was in your shoes I would keep quiet and fix the pipe myself avoiding any further confrontation that could lead to you losing a sale on your house !

When my neighbours put an extension on the back of their house they blocked our satellite signal, we told them andat first they said they would, till they made enquiries and found it would cost £80.
We then got the excuse that we should have noticed it in the planning stage, well so should their architect who cam round to check measurements, light etc.
We had to fork out to move it, put the bill through the door but nothing happened, haven't spoken to them since, not that I did much before