I find that I often write a post and then after putting the words down decide that I won't bother folks with a stupid question.  I am reading other posts about how up and down life is with a growing puppy. It helps just to put my thoughts down but really it is about remaining positive.  I am presently feeling rather down about the fact that my pup is all for my husband and is difficult with me.  We take turns at puppy classes - my post of a few weeks ago - worst dog in class showed how upset I was.  Thanks to all the encouraging replies I had.  The second week my husband handled her and she was by far and above the best pup there.  This week it was my turn. :-(  She is making me feel very inadequate.  She also showed how clever and determined she was when we turned all the pups off the lead.  She hung back and looked around everyone.  She identified which one she thought was the dominant one and ended up challenging him.  Not sure who came off tops - dog language is very subtle.  She had run round all the other dogs and people and when I thought poor baby finding it difficult to join in she was really working it all out.  Seems she has me sussed as well.  Deep breathe and back to training several times a day.  I don't want to end up bottom of the heap in my own home.

Hi just a thought......when you say "back to training her several times a day "maybe she is due a break as she sees you as<<< all work and no play>>>(not suggesting that you dont play with her ) I find that when my girls have a few days... sometimes a week off from training they  are very enthusiastic when we return to it!
the fact that she is good with your OH ...is he at work all day and doesnt bother with the daily routine of training sessions.....you only need do 5 - 10mins a day etc or practice in the evening while watching tv make her do a down in the middle of the room...

~Roni

oh she does sit and down, wait, recall fine - but she is nonchalant - giving me her attention when she feels like it - being distracted by every bird twitter or slight movement.  I can't get her to watch me (except when I make her sit and wait for the command 'go eat' in front of her food bowl.  I play with her but she is intent on getting the toy off me.  Before (we were away last week for 3 nights and she was in kennels) she would 'give' on command.  Now she makes off with the toy I throw for her to fetch and will not let go of the toy I play with.  My OH works mostly from home these days so he takes her out for odd bits of training also.  But we disagree.  I hear him saying 'sit, sit, sit' and I have to tell him - no only one sit!  He has heard exactly the same advice as myself in classes.  This has nothing to do with training but his authority. (Ok you may say that if he has to say sit 3 times then he hasn't got much - but she really watches him all the time)  When I started training it was my voice she listened too.  He couldn't get her attention because he couldn't get a really interesting tone of voice.  However we had a problem because I confronted her when she was guarding a piece of food found on the ground (discussed on an earlier post)  He picked her up by the scruff and brought her in telling her don't you dare - she knew that I backed off when she tried snapping at me. I showed some anxiety at the time.  This was weeks ago when we first had her.  I have put it all in perspective since but I think she is being a bit more challenging now as she gets older - about 19 weeks old now.  I really have to get her to respond to me immediately - She is technically my dog and I do all the nitty gritty, feeding, cleaning, grooming, worming etc.  And there is a little competition coming in here as my OH sits there with a smug grin when he gets the dog to lie down quietly by him - when she comes to me she wants to mouth me and jump up.  When he takes her out she apparently walks nicely, when I take her out she is stressed by the cars and pulls on her lead frantically.   She is still a baby and I know I have a lot of work to do yet.  But you can see why I feel inadequate.  

have you taught the command "off" when she jumps at you or tries to mouth also when she jumps you turn your back on her for a minute then turn back and tell her to sit it comes in very handy when they are jumping up to see whats going on on the kitchen worktops for example (our try to pinch the cat food or anything else available) she will eventually get the message!

Just to add...when we first began training with  my now 2y 3m old girl we shared the training but it wasnt working similar to yourselves so we decided that as I am with her 24/7 it should be me initially with him doing the odd thing at home .
this worked a lot better for us to the point that we trained at class 3 times a week plus 15min spread throughout the day and eventually joined a display team for OB/AG  ....we have beardies who are very intelligent (free thinkers) boisterous energetic dogs (quite a handful) and also the comedian of the team!

~Roni

No need to feel inadequate :)  you both have different 'styles' and she's simply responding in a more 'respectful' way to your OH's 'style' ;)  Some people are naturally more authoritative (in a dog's eyes) than others, men often have the advantage here because of their larger size and naturally deeper, louder voices, but this can make it hard for them to praise and encourage pups/dogs ;)  But this can be rectified, men can learn to sound more 'exciting' and women can learn to be more 'authoritative' :)

A couple of thoughts on what you've written :)  It seems to me that she sees you (rightly or wrongly) as another puppy, a playmate, not someone to look to for guidance and protection (hence her different reaction when on walks)

When your husband plays with her how often does she win the toy? how often does he win?  compare the answers with how often you win the toy and how often she wins it ;)   this may seem trivial, but in her head if you never win the toy then she's stronger than you ;)  You need to win the toys (which are all yours :) ) at least as often as your OH, perhaps a bit more often at first :)

What is the pitch of your voice when you speak to her?  Does it go up when you try to tell her NO? If you get agitated? (many people do this ;) )
What is the pitch of your OH's voice?  - from what you've written I'm betting its deeper than yours simply because he's a man ;)  this gives him a natural advantage in getting her respect ;) perhaps you could try a deeper voice for serious stuff like NO and some commands, especially if she's ignoring you ;)  

Only train for 5 mins maximum at a time, don't give her time to get bored ;)  but you can train several times a day, which gives her chance to take in what she's learning ;)  this will also ensure that she doesn't associate you with boredom ;)  and always try to finish a session with something she will do, so that you both end on a positive note :D :D

Hope this helps a little, trying to train a pup can make us all feel pretty useless at times :)

My husband has been playing the retrieve games far more and having her sit and wait while he walks as far away as possible - we are lucky in having our own field next door to our house.  I was letting her win a toy occasionally if she was being very good.  But this week I haven't let her win at all.  We have just been out for a walk in the pouring rain.  I dried her with a towel which she started tugging.  When I touched her round her mouth she growled but this may have been play because when I asked for her to give she sat and let go. I decided to play with the towel and repeat the give - a bit of a risk seeing that the towel was quite high value.  But she gave it up a few times more.  Lots of praise (and relief from me)  I then replaced the towel with a much favoured squeaky toy which I threw for her to play with.  She brought it back and offered it to me to play.  She carried on giving me the toy for a treat.  I played hide the toy and fetch.  She was good as gold. I finished playing while the going was good and gave her a treat.  Much more encouraging today.
As for voice - yes I do tend to use a high voice.  I have to be quite conscious when I lower my voice - I forget when she has just done something wrong.  She knows 'off' but doesn't always respond to it.  In fact she sometimes jumps and nips more.  I have to turn away from her and ignore.  She is very good at trying to stop me doing that.  I will try the deeper tone next time.

Where do you get all those smilies from?

For the jumping up and nipping I would tell her 'off' once (or whichever is you command to stop)  if she carried on after that I would send her out of the room for a few minutes to calm down (I sent mine to the kitchen and closed the baby gate at the door) if she won't go, keep a short house lead on her and use that to take her out and leave her there ;) its important that she can still see you and know what she's missing.  If you are consistent with this she'll soon cotton on and realise that jumping up is not going to work :)

It does sound as if you're feeling a bit more positive now :D  so something you're doing must be working :D

For the smilies put the cursor over the one you want to do and it'll show you what to type :D

:)  ;)  :D      :rolleyes:  :p 

Hope this helps