Is it always a bad thing? I'm picking up my puppy the 3rd of August and haven't totally decided where he should sleep. I know a lot of people say never in the bedroom it will make a dog feel important and cocky, and I do agree with this without question for dominant breeds. However I don't know if it really applies to the usually more submissive type breeds. Would I make my male sheltie puppy dominant by letting him sleep in my bedroom in a create? I'm so tempted to have him in there but don't want to spoil him! I believe in laying down rules like I eat first, go through doors and not giving attention on demand and i think I'm fairly clued up. Just this is really nagging at me!

>I believe in laying down rules like I eat first, go through doors and not giving attention on demand and i think I'm fairly clued up.

All that's actually a bit dated, discredited and outmoded, actually! ;)

<All that's actually a bit dated, discredited and outmoded, actually! >

Oh.So I've studied all these books for nothing. *throws them in air*  I have to admit my Chihuahua sleept on my bed from when I was 6 to 16, and she was really well trained. I only stoped as she couldn't jump up or off the bed properly anymore when age set in. Not that I'm going have the Sheltie in bed, theres not enough room. :D

lol becks

You want to try sharing your bed with 2 Irish Setters, 1 Gordon Setter almost always 1 Cat and 1 OH, poor OH has learned to sleep half on half off the bed :D :D

Wow that must be a sight to see, heehee *wants to see a picture of all your pets on the bed* :)

I have to say, that it is a wee bit like musical beds in my house as our bedroom door is left open, sometimes they are all in our room albeit maybe only one on the bed at a time, however if we are having a lie in of a weekend, they all seem to manage to get a space somehow or another :D It's quite amazing how small a big dog like that can curl up. Whatever cat is on the bed usually stretches out and appears to take up most of the space, the dogs tend to hang on round the edges or lie directly between the OH and me, we just have to put up very cold bums that hang out of the bed :D :D I will say thought that when told they all toddle happily off to their own beds.

according to a few things i have read on this site, rumour has it that the "dog whisperer" techniques are discredited and outmoded ,does anyone know what the new ideas are, or what is a good alternative to this approach?

HI Becks

My dogs sleep in my bedroom, one of them on my bed!!!!!  I don't eat before my dogs, if they are going into the garden I don't make them wait for me to go through the door before I do and my dogs get attention all the time, whether they demand it or not.  A lot of the "rules" you are describing are quite outdated now and have been found to be ineffective!  When you first get your puppy he will be very disorientated and I personally would advise that it will probably be easier for you to have him in a crate in your bedroom.  That is not spoiling him.  I suggest that you get a couple of books.  The one that is often suggested on this forum is Gwen Bailey - The Perfect Puppy.  Also, I would go and buy yourself a copy of The Culture Clash by Jean Donaldson.  This book is fabulous and a real eye opener for dispelling beliefs that have been rife throughout the "dog" world for years. 

Don't worry too much about your puppy.  The main thing is that you enjoy him.

Kind regards
Annie

never let ypour dogs to do that!!! my vet told me that dont ask me why

There's no problem as long as your dog gets off the bed when told to. It's entirely up to the individual where the dog sleeps.
:)

To be honest, I know that some people will think it's bad to have your dog on the bed.  The thing is that Megan was my first dog and when it was just her and I it didn't matter too much.  She always gets off the bed when I ask, as do all of mine when they try to sneak upstairs for a sly snooze on the bed.  I wish I hadn't started it though because it means I have to keep washing duvet covers and duvets.  They don't realise when they have muddy feet. :d :d

I've just learned how to do these faces today so its a real novelty just now.  Small minds etc., :d :d

Annie

Far from making a puppy cocky, I believe it will make them secure and confident........  The other rules you talk about are based on discredited research based on captive wolves.  A dogs mentality is far closer a wolf pup that a mature wolf, and a wolf pup in the wild would actually eat first.  I'd suggest these 'rules' work because they encourage the owner to be consistent, not because of any special understanding of the humans behaviour by the dog......

People i need your help (Please) I  recently got a 4 year old Dobe (rescue) i had him sleeping in the spare room with a dog gate so he could see whats going on and not be completely alone, but for the past week i have had him in my room sleeping (which was nice) tried putting him back in his room and he's just been barking all night (i didn't give in as i know he'll do it even more for the attention) but i think the neighbours will be planning a witch hunt shortly if it carries on!  I moved him back into the spare room because i was told he will think that he's alpha!  Is this true?  He does get down when i tell him & rarely gets on the bed without my say so (just now he's laid on the floor as i havn't given him the go ahead to go on the bed) but i havn't yet completely established the alpha role, so i don't want him thinking im a push over etc?  I go to dog training classes and i've been instructed to be alot more firm with him E.G if he doesn't sit after 2 commands gentley push him in the sit position etc general things like that?  Please Help

Many thanks....

Luke & Bailey :-)

IMHO by entering into physical battles like that when he doesn't sit, you're more likely to get a dog that doesn't respect you than one who does........  Ask yourself *WHY?* doesn't he sit?  Is the floor surface slippery?  Does he understand what you are asking him to do?  Is there any physical reason why he may find sitting difficult (hip problems perhaps?) Do y ou make sure you have his attention BEFORE asking him to do something?

If he hasn't shown any tendancies to decide who may/may not sleep in your bed so far, why change things?

Where your dog sleeps probably isn't all that important .  Look at how you want to live your life (with your dog) set some rules which suit you and be consistent in applying them.  If it means letting your dog sleep on your bed - fine - as long as when you tell your dog 'off' it does just that without growling and showing teeth!

Be careful also of making the mistaking of thinking dogs from a dominant breeds are more likely to challenge you than those from so called submissive breeds.  There are dogs who belong to a so called dominant breed who will not challenge you at all and others who you expect to be submissive who will run rings around you.  Like people, each dog has its own temperament as well as variations specific to its breed.  Genetics make its temperament but this can also be influenced and moulded by its experience of life .

From my own experience - if you decide where you do want to allow your dog to go/sleep before you get him then enforce these rules from day one you shouldn't have a problem.

My two are both sleep in our bedroom (i wouldn't want it any other way) and they are both allowed to sleep with us on the bed if they want. They both have their own beds in the room and really choose only sleep with us if it's cold or if we are having a lazy sunday morning. They both know what 'in your own bed' means and they get off if we say that.

I also don't do the eating after me thing, my mother did and i found our dog used to 'watch' us whilst we ate. My two are fed at a similar time every evening before us and they are usually snoozing whilst we eat.

It depends on the relationship you want with your dog, day to day our relationship is very relaxed and almost equal but they know that when i say certain things im exercising my authority and they follow the rules. I own two affectionate, secure and confident schnauzers - both entire males and ive never had any issues with them. They are fab! :D

I think someone else said it but The Perfect Puppy by Gwen Bailey is a good read, full of good practices and my youngest was trained using this book, the schedule can be daunting and hard work but it pays off sooner than you think :)

Most of all have fun! :)

I only worry about laying rules down as I simply will want to play and fuss him all the time! So got scared that he may take advantage of that. More so when he hits his "teen age" period.  I'll try to chill and just him enjoy him. I have The Perfect Puppy by Gwen Bailey , I'm reading it now in fact. :)

I think it all depends on the size the dogs going to grow too!

Sharing a bed with a pup Staffy was great, sharing a bed with a full grown one who farts constantly is a different ball game.

Start as you mean to go on!

lol :D

We had our puppy sleeping in the bedroom from the day we brought her home. I think it helped her to settle in as she never cried at all and now she's happy to sleep downstairs if she wants but mostly she'll be in the bedroom with us. We don't have her on the bed though - she's a Newfie! Do not want to be sharing the duvet with an adult Newf and if you add her (fully grown) to the Lab X that's potentially a total of 16-18 stones of dogs on the bed

Do you think the bed would take it? :)  Probably all end up on the floor :d

Annie

I have my concerns, dogdeli1!! I think there will have to be a 'one dog at a time' rule, in the interests of preserving the bed springs :D

LOL

Annie

I agree with blondiflops. We have a Bichon Frise weighing approx 5 kilos, he lays on the bed whilst I read or watch TV. When the light goes out he jumps down and into his basket. Now that would be a completely different story if it was a Great Dane or Newfie. :-)

Sometimes I wish small dogs were my thing :) I would have no problem with the dogs sleeping on the bed if we weren't at risk of being squished or drowning in slobber. And don't even get me started about the snoring... :rolleyes:

<<I have my concerns, dogdeli1!! I think there will have to be a 'one dog at a time' rule, in the interests of preserving the bed springs>>

hahaha :D

The Happy Dog's Bedtime Prayer:-

Now I lay me down to sleep,
The king-size bed is soft and deep.
I sleep right in the center groove
My human being can hardly move!
I've  trapped her legs,
she's tucked in tight,
And here is where I pass the night.
No one disturbs me or dares intrude
Till morning comes and I want food!
I sneak up slowly and it begins
My nibbles on my human's chin.
She wakes up slowly and smiles and shouts,
"You darling beast! Just cut it out!"
But morning's here and it's time to play
I always seem to get my way.
So thank you, Lord, for giving me
This human person that I see
The one who hugs and holds me tight
and shares her bed with me at night!

-  Author  unknown  -
but I bet it was a dog :D

TERI
who shares her bed with three large, furry, wriggly BSDs, (occasionally four )
oh, and OH too :P
 

Hi

It used to cause problems having the dog on the bed when I was with my ex.  However, it was sorted out.  The dog is still here and he is my ex!!!!! :)

Annie

Sums it up perfectly Teri ;) Could have been written by my boy :D No doubt a lot of others on here will be thinking the same..............

When we had dogs as a kid they always used to sleep on my bed and I continued to let my own dogs do it when I got my own place, but soon realised that I didn't want to be washing bed covers 24/7 so promptly stopped them and for many years all mine slept in other rooms.

When I got Ella, as she was very insecure, I let her sleep in with us (just to make her more secure and happy and then I was going to slowly introduce her to the downstairs) it never happened :rolleyes: When we got Monsterman, who is rather large by doggy standards,  I was firm and made him sleep downstairs as I didn't want 2 hairy mutts in the boudoir...........Then we got Callia, who really pushed his lordships nose out of joint so he joined Ella and I in the bedroom...just temporarily you understand.........a 6 months later, he is still sharing my bed with me.....yes, literally :P..........As for Callia, she sleeps in her crate in the kitchen, the door is always open and having tried to deprive her of it a few weeks ago, she howled so loudly all night, I've now had to reinstate it. She only goes in it at bedtime of her own volition...........dogs eeh :D :D

What I'm trying to say in my own long winded way is that start as you mean to go on.........like me.....not ................and consistency always wins the day.............the dogs consistency that is :P

our 14 month lab sleeps anywhere in the house, we leave all the doors open and leave him to it.

currently he sleeps downstairs on the laminate, where it must be cooler than a carpeted floor. other times he sleeps on the bed, but not for long, generally he sleeps at my side of the bed.

When it comes to eating, i feed him on my return from work at 6 and then take my own dinner. this lets his dinner digest prior to going out for a walk at the back of 7.

i started by having rules, but some of them, especially the eating thing are hard to do as bruce gets fed in the morning at 7, after his walk and again at 6. To have him eat after me would mean that he wouldnt see a thing til after 7. mind you getting it before us doesnt stop him doing the most starved dog in the world look....

Like hairypooch says, do your own thing, see what fits for you.

I have just had an absolute giggle this afternoon reading howeveryone copes with the sleeping arrangements - Buffy has just come upsatirs on the bed in the last month as she suffers SA badly and it has really helped her to feel more secure and settled..... however for a Parsons Terrier she really can hog the bed :) Stretches out right between me and mark with her head on the pillows!! .... she is feelin so much more settled she actually spent the last few nights in her own bed in the room... but like the prayer says 'when its food time!!!'

Thanks for the giggle... just off to drag buffy out of the paddling pool!!

Like most people my boys sleep in the bedroom with us.  They only generally come up on the bed on a Saturday morning when we may have a (rare) lay in until say 8am.  At the moment the long haired one is sleeping downstairs on the laminate but comes upstairs every hour or so and sleeps inthe bedroom, then gets too hot and goes back downstairs.  My other WSD sleeps under the bed with his feet sticking out, that way I trip over him during the night and he knows I have got up.

When we got each of them as puppies they both slept in a crate in our room until they were completely housetrained which was only a matter of a couple of weeks in any case.  Never sought to change it.

Abby sleeps in her bed next to ours, well she does until OH goes to work then she gets up onto ours which I dont have a problem with it OH does. Maybe I should do what someone else suggested and keep the dog on the bed and get rid of OH.
Mary

Wasn't going to comment on this thread as I thought that I'd be seen as a boring person whose dogs definitely do not sleep on the bed :D However, after seeing JG's thread about her sofa, I'm jolly glad that my dogs aren't on the bed - and I expect that JG is too :D :D :D

Daisy

Too flipping right, Daisy! They stay downstairs! :D

Willis and Phoebe are sometimes allowed up on a Saturday morning - and I have been known to let both up to sleep if J is away - but with the bed seriously buckling, Phoebe blowing slobber bubbles when she snores and Willis sucking his blankie till he drops off to sleep - its hardly ideal :D

On the odd occasion my dogs can get to my room (when we're away, the cats are upstairs at home behind a stair gate) they sleep on my bed.  I have no problems with "dominance" (which, you may guess, is a theory i don't partake in at all), even in my "dominant" breeds - dobermann and rottweiler X GSD.  They know the rules, and that's about it.  The one problem I do have is fitting in bed myself!!

I went to Scotland in November, and stayed at a B&B - the woman took one look at my dogs and moved me from a single room to a double :D every night I turned the light off, and before I'd left the switch to get into bed both dogs were in it - Opi sprawled down the side nearest me, and Remy curled up by the pillow.  I woke up most mornings half off the bed :) gotta love em!

Mine are upstairs too :o

A trainer once told us that sleeping with us was the most natural thing for a dog as they sleep in packs in the wild.  Ours often sleep on the bed but dachsies are very naughty and if they want to wee at night they don't always bother to use the dog flap so we have started to crate them at night.  They love it and take themselves in there before I go to bed.  so it is really up to you - whatever suits you best

Wow I never knew this post would get so many people talking. Its lovely to hear all the close bonds everyone here has with their dogs. :)

mine actually comes upstairs about four in the morning and tries to wake the youngest child up with a kiss {or slobber} just so the child gets up and the dog can stretch out and go to sleep on the bed, usually i hear him and tell him go to sleep until about 7 am when i sometimes find the youngest child curled up on the floor and the dog asleep in bed'

I would prefer our dog in the kitchen to be truthful ;-) but after being trained to sleep in the kitchen at night (like our other dog was) for months he suddenly started crying  everynight and getting very stressed out and scratching at the dog-gate as well as weeing and pooing, even though he had had a late night walk. :-(  I eventually gave in and allowed him to sleep on my 13 yr old daughters bed and he is happy now and no problem at all (except when it was very hot last week and he had me up five times in the night :-()

The only time mine are allowed on the bed or more precisely Thomas is allowed in the bed is when the girls are in season.  Ian hates it because he has to sleep with his face on the pillows.  I really am going to have to get him neutered ;)  Lucky sleeps with Charlotte but that is because she is her dog and we left the decision with her.

I have this vision of a Newfie leaping off the bed in the middle of the night, and the human sleeper bouncing off the ceiling!!

Thanx for that mental image chinablue...very reassuring for me!!

:D :D

**goes to look for Newf-proof baby gate....**

My dog sleeps at the foot of my bed
don't wrinkle your nose in disgust
I know all the thoughts that flash through your head
about pawprints and stray hairs and dust
and sometimes he snores and he wriggles in sleep
and sometimes he's heavy as lead
but my sleep is sweeter and sounder and deep
with my dog at the foot of my bed.
In the morning he creeps to my pillow
and wakes me by licking my cheek
it's better than any alarm clock I know
and a great way of starting the week.
We go down for breakfast together
and begin the new day ahead
But sometimes my dog
he sneaks back upstairs
and sleeps....at the foot of my bed :D :D :D

Yvonne

Oh Yvonne, what a wonderful poem - thanks for putting a big grin on my face this morning :D :D :D

You're very welcome ;)

Yvonne

Don't mind in the winter, but in this heat wave it's unbearable having those hot little animal bodies plastered right next to me.  Why do they have to lie so close, don't they get hot too?  And I can't figure out how a mere 11 pounds of cat can take up so much room and generate so much heat.  55 lb.s of Labrador Retreiver in my sleeping bag on a near freezing night on a canoe trip is a treat though.

Hi Becks,
My daughters Samoyed goes to bed with them, it even tells them when it is bedtime.
It is very well trained it goes out in the garden, when he comes in he barks to
have his feet wiped and a baby wipe on his bottom. Before entering the lounge!
He sleeps on the floor at the bottom of the bed, on hot evenings it even opens the bedroom
window, which I hassen to add has a safty lock on. It has the run of the house.
If one of them get up, it does take there place in the bed. Laying on its back with his
Legs in the air!!
Regards
Denese