hey guys thank for your support. and disscusion, my last comments on this matter,  when the vet was [sick] the practice could have called me 2 days previously as they were in full knowledge of the fact hat the vets "sickness" was indeed planned and was nothing medical or a personal or family crisis. the two personnel who  caused the postponement of the operation were already covering for two other women staff. i do indeed live in the real world and it is hard. what do i do when my children are sick ? they do have a father my wonderful husband, doting grandparents,and indeed myself,[reliable surgeons are not the problem its support staff] so i can asure everyone that my children are not neglected in anyway nor are our dogs, cats, fish or donkey. maybe my opinions are a little harsh but if you choose a career in matters of life and death you must, must, must provide equal or better cover at all times,keep the patient informed every step of the way be the patient animal and human.once again thanks for the "forum" and i look forward to others with stong opinions venting their spleens.

Hi Pru, I have read your posts and firstly I am very sorry for the trouble you are having with your dog :( I am a vet student now in my senior clinical years, and now the end is very much in sight, I have started to think of my life beyond vet school, as lets face it, I am not getting any younger :D !!!

I have to say that vet school is not easy and a decision one does not make lightly. It is by far the toughest thing I have ever done, and with this I don't mean the actual material to study (as it is just so interesting and wonderful to learn!!), as I went into vet school in order to be able to learn this material so I could help animals, but nothing could perpare me for the never-ending hours and sheer strain put on your life that are needed to keep up with it. The pressure in college and working is incredible, and there is no way someone could survive it without having other things in their lives (no matter how small, even just TV!!) to keep them from cracking up.

Still, I do not feel that I have to start justifying having a life outside of veterinary.
Yes, I am a vet (or will be :D ), but do not want it to define my entire existence or feel that it should have to.
If that were the case, what would happen if I failed a vet exam?   , of if for some medical reason I was not able to work anymore????? No, I think that it would be very unhealthy.
There has to be more to life than even a vocational job such as vet med, even if we are vets, we are still people in the end and others  do seem to forget this.....I have had countless occasions of people wanting to be 'friends' just because of what I do, and people who did not liked me, before even speaking to me, again just because of the 'label'. 

And even if I believe that vets (aka people) are entitled to have other things in life such as a family and in my case, dogs :) , I do think that due to the highly abnormal amount of hours, nights and weekends 'on call', one needs to have a proper back-up system set up in the event that a family emergency should arise, or in the event that one should have to cancel their 'on call' for what ever reason.

All the vets I know, know their locums personally.  I would not dream of leaving my 'on call' to someone that I did not know or thought would in any way upset my clients, as just because I cannot do my 'on call' for family reasons, does not mean I dont care about my clients and animlas  anymore or have forgotten why I put myself through the hardship and sacrifice of getting my degree in the first place.

And believe me, deciding to cancel your work hours is not a decision that is taken lightly or often, like in any job, nobody likes having to do it, but when it is necessary, as in the case of a sick child or other family member, at least there is a team of other vets that will back you up.
The lenght of materinity leave is a very personal thing, I think she is well entitled to taking as few or as many months as she wants, as long as the practice has organized a replacement for the time she is away.
In my experience, vets who try to 'find a balance' between work and whatever else they have in life, are much happier people, and I know with myself, ever since I started bringing other things into my life such as dog shows, my grades have gone up, am less stressed, and am a much happier person, but I am still feel as strongly about helping animals and people as I did the first day I walked into the vet school.
Carol :)

Well said Carol :)

We all get a bit miffed from time to time when the particular vet we want to see isn't there, as I said in an earlier post, but I am really pleased with the way the other vet took over and told him so when I went to collect some medicine for my girl today :)

Dee

had a few mins spare and i re read all your posts.2 people in particular come across as womans rights and nothing else matters.yes i do think a woman should think very very carefully before embarking on a family and a vocational career.have any of you heard of house husbands ? men are quite capable creatures if alowed to be. there is quite a scope for give and take in life between the sexes.all you hear these days is mothers this mothers that but there are fathers too they can do anythingwe can,feed babies breast milk if  its expressed. good for those who want to stay at home with the kids, i personally think that it is ideal that a parent stays at home full time with a kids. had a chat with the vet that caused the controversy today and she  said that being away for so long has set her career back and that her mother would be looking after the child full time because she could not do both.and if she had known then what she knows now she would have definately thought twice about starting a family.i am guessing that a lot of you breed dogs, is this where you get  the impression that the male does his bit then its all got to be mother untill they leave the basket.

"On the other hand you don't normally see the same kind of change in men who become fathers - their commitment to their career remains more or less the same."

No because generally speaking they have a wife .................

This comment inparticular made me cringe :(

>if she had known then what she knows now she would have definately thought twice about starting a family.

What a wicked thing to say - wishing she'd never had her own child! :( She should think herself flaming lucky. I wouldn't trust such a heartless, self-centred person with the care of my dogs, I'm afraid. :(

I have to agree with JG on this one It was a pretty heartless thing for your vet to say :(

My kids drive me bonkers at times,but i feel blessed everyday that i have them :)

"reliable surgeons are not the problem its support staff"

Hmmm, I don't like joining contentious threads really but find it hard to sit back and read posts that are deflammatory to certain groups of people en masse.  I am disappointed that anyone who comes from a 'caring profession'
a) cannot get to grips with the use of a capital "I" (after all you must have been educated to a very high standard to get to the post you hold) - I know this is personal but this post does seem to be criticising from a personal perspective.
b) makes sweeping comments as above about the very people that enable them to do their job effectively!

I am sure there will be many members of the nursing profession and other hospital staff that will be just as exasperated by your comment Pru, as you were about the lack of responsibility you feel your vet gave to you.

People never cease to amaze me.

Well said, Jackjat

Daisy

Carol there are lots of comments on this thread that are insulting aren't there?

We must also remember that this poor vet who is being slated, isn't here to put her side of things.

I know the OP came to this forum for advice and probably didn't expect some of the advice offered but its a valuable lesson to us all to consider others, their circumstances and feelings.

I can't see that she asked for advice. She had a long moan about the vet's inadequacies and then asked if she should change vets For someone of her undoubted intelligence (and following on after her rather unkind rant), surely the answer was obvious :(

Daisy

     " i am guessing that a lot of you breed dogs, is this where you get  the impression that the male does his bit then its all got to be mother untill they leave the basket.  "

I am sure that I am not the only CD member here to find this comment particularly insulting :(  :( 
Carol (going to make strong tea now)

I have been reading this thread and thought I wouldn't get involved, but I now have to say my piece.

My vets practice has 4 partners and 6 other vets. My boy was very pooly with ear troubles for years and although I prefered to see one of two vets in particular because he knew his history, but if he wasn't there, then I din't care who I saw as long as they gave my boy what he needed. Then when he got sick again last year, yes, I had a preference of which vet I saw, who did all the tests he could. He referred me to a specialist, another vet we did not know, but was going to see him with the best interests of my boys health.
A week after my dog died this particular vet at my practice said he was leaving. He also said that the other vet we saw as well is leaving in the summer. I guess that I will see one of the others, its no big deal as long as they care for my animals.

Nothing is permanent and people change jobs all the time, so to put all the blame onto one vet is ludicrous. So what if she had a family, as Carol said, there would have been back up. All they have to do is read the case history, if not, then you tell them.

If a vet told me that she would not have had her child if she knew what was going to happen to her career, then I would not take any of my pets to her.

Hi Pru, I am very curious as to why you have decided to leave your chosen career to do a veterinary degree?  You must have had to work very hard indeed and probably overcome prejudice etc to become a senior surgical registrar so I wonder why you have now decided to change careers and embark on six years' unpaid hard slog as a student again :D  It just seems a shame to me that all the skills and abilities you've worked hard to achieve will now be lost to the health service, although off course the veterinary profession will gain :)  I'm really rather envious of you - it would be lovely to have the opportunity of not just one, but two, high powered careers :)

Good luck with your studies :D

Lesley

yes i had to work hard, but i have encountered little predjudice.a veterinary degree will ,i am in no doubt be harder.after years of banging my head up the great brick wall known as the nhs,and a proportion of human patients who will not help themselves no matter how hard you try and insist on abusing their bodies with no thought of the people who are sick through no fault of their own and need the precious resources.i will not be wasting the [expensive as i am sure some of you will point out]extensive training and the knowledge i have gained over the years as i will be heavily involved in a research program alongside my studies.please dont be envious lesley we all do what we have to i just hope i do it to the best of my ability.

to those who think i am insulting, are you not doing the same by implying that if it is not your view it must be wrong ,insulting etc i dont apologise for having stong views and nor would i expect you to. i am sorry for the poor typing ,when i was at uni we did not have laptops etc and the last 10/15 years i have been up to my eyes in peoples insides so i have not had time to polish my typing skills

good for you pru,i cant believe some of the replies you had.i thought a forum every body was entitled to their view no matter what without being battered for it. i am sick to death of all this pc lark i say lets\all say what we really feel without having to explain or justify it. personally i dont care what people think of me if we get on ,cool ,if we dont thats cool to.i am sure a lot of people feel the same. hopfully we are all on this forum because we all love dogs and prus gripe was not for herself but for her beloved boy. so lets here it for the dogs of  the world you dont hear them screeming "its my right"

>i thought a forum every body was entitled to their view no matter what

Exactly, moondrops! Pru has exactly the same rights, no more, no less, to put her view as has everyone else. People can agree or disagree as they choose. It's called free speech.
:)