Im seeking solace from someone who can appreciate what Ive just been through.  Im going to try to condense the last years events in a short story.

I got Max from the SSPCA Inverness in Dec 03, Border Collie 2 yrs old.  In March 04 he had an epileptic fit in my bedroom in the middle of the night (my God I almost had a heart attack on the spot, as never had witnessed such a thing) fit consisted of legs thrashing, choking, shaking etc and lasted approx. 30 secs, after this he was dopey, didnt know who I was etc.  Most of the time he was a friendly happy little faithful baby, but when he had fits he seemed to be in a lot of distress.  I took him to the vets and they did a blood sample to rule out Liver/Kidney problems.  In April he had another fit and a pattern started.  Every month he would have one, within a few months he started having clusters and he was put on 1 x Epiphen Tablet 30mg.  The fits continued sometimes clusters of 3, sometimes 7, which was heartbreaking to witness and anyone who has experienced this will know that its equally heartbreaking once they come around to watch them pace the floor for half an hour, banging into everything possible.  During 04 I experimented with more epiphen, until he was up to the maximum dose of 3 60mg tabs per day.  The fits continued.  In January the vet put him on Epilese x 1 Tablet and 3 x Epiphen, this stopped the fits but every single night he would have head tremors, lie back as though going to have a fit and then snap himself out of it.  This happened for at least 3-4 hours of the night.  So Tablets were then reduced to 1 to 2 Epiphen and 1 x Epilese.  Since his first fit he had dirtied on the floor every night but I never minded cleaning up after him.  Also when we went out for walks recently, as soon as he was let off the lead he used to run away and I would be panic-striken.  After 2 weeks Max had minimum 4 fits in 24 hours, he didnt recognise me and seemed to be in much distress.  I had contemplated ending his suffering previously but clung onto a tiny bit of hope he would get better.  It was now time.  I took him and selflessly ended his suffer even thought I was breaking inside and still am.  It was a decision that I had to make on my own that was a happy, normal  doggy sometimes and then miserable, confused, shocked and in pain others.  I hope to God I have made the right decision but hope that no-one else EVER has to go through what me and Max did.  I dont blame the vets, as they were supportive and without actually telling me to get him euthanased, did say it would be kinder.  However I do wonder if he had fits prior to my getting him, if so how could anyone be so cruel as to let me have him, dedicate my time and feelings to him only to have him taken away from me.  Angela :-(

Angela - I'm so sorry to hear your story.    You say you had Max for three months before he had his first fit - it may well be that he had had a couple of fits before he was handed in to the SSPCA.

Try and remember the good days with him - you did your best for him, and you gave him love - which I'm sure he returned.

Margot

Thank you for all your kind words. x

hello i know what you are going through as i had to do it four wks ago with my eight month old pup you have done the kindest thing and now your dog is not suffering anymore hope she is running free with my maggie at rainbow bridge.take care

I really hope so, he was such a good boy and wouldnt have hurt anyone.  I hope my message helps anyone who has had to go through similar ordeals. x

how awful for you. epilepsy is in some BC lines :(
ive known 5 with it now,personally (luckily not my own)
at least you did your best for max,some of the dogs ive known have got worse over time. im sure before long someone will come along on here who has gone through it also.
god bless max,run free now

Epilepsy can be very different in individual cases. Fitting which deteriorates into Status Epilepticus is less common thank goodness and is even less common in a dog so young. I was lucky in that my Bethany never reached that stage by her death from cancer at almost 14, although several friends dogs have deteriorated to this in later life. The usual treatment to bring a dog out of Status Epilepticus is an injection of Valium, but some dogs get to the stage where even this is only a temporary restbite. When this happens the outcome can really be only one thing.

It's so hard when you are forced to take the actions you did but it's the last kindness you can do for your dog.

Regards, John

It is the hardest thing ever and I hope that I never have to make that decision again.  Although anyone who does have to make it, I would suggest getting your  puppy sedated first as it makes it all the more peaceful.  Max was snoring - such a brave wee boy. x

Epileptic fits are very frightening for the onlooker, aren't they? Some years ago I had a friend who had epilepsy and she told me that the fits themselves didn't actually bother her - she was completely and deeply unconscious, so I guess that dogs are the same.

Dogs (and people) react differently to different drugs - some have no effect, some seem to make things worse and some can make a huge improvement in the frequency and severity of the fits. It's all down to the individual.

It's worth remembering that all animals, including humans, have a threshold at which fits will occur. Epilepsy is a sign that in those individuals the threshold is lower than normal. Idiopathic (of no known cause) epilepsy in dogs typically begins between 18 months and 3 years of age, so your dog fits neatly into the timeslot. Fits generally occur when the dog is relaxed or asleep, so if he'd been living in kennels and had had a fit before you got him (possible, but I wouldn't assume it had happened) it's more than likely it had never been witnessed.

Epilepsy has been found in all breeds and crosses, though some breeds seem to be more likely to develop it. I'm so sorry that medication didn't work for your boy.

Very very frightening to the onlooker - and I have read before that the dog feels no pain etc during the fit but what about afterwards when they have temporary blindness - surely this must be traumatic - or they try to stand and look like a new born foal - or you stroke them to comfort them and they jump in surprise as they seem to not sense it you.  Surely keeping them alive to suffer is not kind?

Max used to pace my kitchen floor, banging his head/body for at least 1/2 an hour after a fit, once when I was at work he got stuck in the bathroom and because he couldnt contain his bladder, he would, everyday dirty the floor.  One day I came home to find he had fitted, pooed, then done his pacing and walked it all over the house.

When I came home he looked sad and prideless, I just hugged him, having to go through such traumas on his own whilst I wasnt there.

I have to stop as Im trying to see through tearful eyes.

So very sorry,a friend of mine has a border collie that has fits she will soon have to make a decision to have her pts,its the hardest thing but the kindest that we can do for our beloved pets,feeling guilty is a part of grieving and in time you will move on.there is no easy way,you did your very best.
Love Sheila.x

several years ago I had a GSD puppy. One day we were at a doggy party and my pup was left with my hubby, a few minutes later i glanced towards my pup only to see my hubby with her upside down shaking her, he had given her something to eat and it had got stuck in her throat, she had stopped breathing, but eventually they got her going again, but it was too late, she was starved to long of oxygen, and had the most terrible fits all week, so it was my decision to have her put to sleep , she was 16 weeks old.