Sorry if this is a bit long.

I was very angry and upset to see that one of my pups is being abused in his new home.  When the child came with his parents to see my pups he was great and was very gentle now however I was astounded to see that the child pokes the pup in the eye and kicks him :( the child (aged 3) then wonders why the pup growls and bites him.  The pup has even drawn blood.  I have tried giving them tips (for the kid as well as the pup) but they just don't seem to be able to take it in.

I so much want to have my pup back from them and rear him myself or find another home.  They have only had the pup 3 weeks and when I go to visit the family (the mum is a friend of mine) the pup comes running over to me and goes to follow me out of the house.  He only seems to be quiet when I am around or if I am holding him.

I am worried that he may become child agressive because of this kids behaviour and so much want to kick this kid right up the a***e.  I did mention on the sale of the pup that should the pup become too much then they were to return the pup to me and I will rehome it, I know wish that I had mentioned that if the kids become too much for the pup then I will take the pup back.

I am so angry with myself for letting the poor animal go through this and that there doesn't seem to be anything I can do about it.  Can I really go to them and ask for my pup back as I don't like the attitude the kid has got with him?  I am half tempted to phone the RSPCA about it because all he ever does is howl until I go in through the door but I doubt if they would do anything as he is feed and watered regularly.  I can hear him crying as soon as I draw up outside the house god only knows what the neighbours are thinking.  I have recently found out that did own another staff before but couldn't control her so got rid of her.  Anyone any suggestions?

You could start placing doubts in their minds
IE God isnt he a naughty pup doing that ,youll have to watch him when he gets older
or ohh he shouldnt have drawn blood lets hope he doesnt turn in to a biter later on.
I know its not the best thing in the world to do but if they begin to think the
dog may be a problem later on (which he may be if he is being treated like that)
then they may have doubts on keeping him and let you have him back sooner :-)

I have started doing that.  I have told them that I don't like the look of him when he starts growling and barking it looks really agressive and that they need to stamp it out NOW.  They just seem to laugh it off by saying that it's his age he's only finding his feet.  I told them that it is now 3 weeks he has been with them and he should know his boundries by now.  I'll keep up with this and if I feel that he is getting too aggressive I will have to be a bit more blunt.  I have even told her husband that he needs to alter his speech as he is very loud spoken almost shouting and he keeps calling the pup a little f***ker. 

He even told me how a boy he knows can do fasle papers.  I absolutely flipped.  He backed right off when I told him the problems this could cause not only for the breeder of the cosher bitch but what it could do to the whole stafford breed.

i think you will have to be straight with your friend and tell her you are not happy, it might involve a full refund ,tell her you want the dog back

I'm afraid I would be really sneaky. I would go round and suggest that I could feel a lump when holding him in his stomach...and that it could be something serious (and costly). I would apologise profusely and over the space of a few days say that i felt terribly guilty of the possible costs and should I have him back a while and take him to my own vets.... you see where I am going? Offer them a full refund because the vet is unable to find out what it is etc etc.  Move fast though before they get more attached - and of course, they may take the pup to thewir vets...but so? And if they are the usual rubbish owners they will want rid as soon as they think pup is going to cost them ;)

RSPCA won't do anything, tell the owners how you are feeling, tell them that what their child is putting the pup though is unfair and as the breeder you will not have one of your pups feeling that way.  Ofer a refund if you have to, anything to save this poor little puppy, if anything before you kick the child up the ar**e and get into trouble yourself!!!!! ;)

Rox

If you criticise their child then you could really offend them.... parents can be very protective of their "little darlings" :(

Thanks guys, I am definately going to have to do something.  She's comming over later so I might have a quiet word in her ear about how I feel then take it from there.  If I lose a friend then so be it.  I'd rather lose a friend than be known for breeding an aggressive dog.

Thanks for your advice guys and keep any suggestions coming forward I am really going to need some help on this one.  I don't mind losing one friend when I have loads at champdogs :)

But what if you lose the friend and the pup :(

You're right not to worry too much about losing a friend, but as Chloe points out, you need to get your pup back asap.
If you can get to see the pup this afternoon perhaps say one of the litter mates has developed a problem like Chloe suggested, and you need to check their pup too..........

Let us know how you get on.

liberty :)

I am sorry about your puppy and the situation you are in Take the puppy home I think your freind might know her wee one is being unkind to it. Maybe she will even be relieved when you take it away

Jean

I think that you know what the outcome will be if you do nothing, I doubt that your friend would give her child a grenade with the pin out to play with....
If he were my pup I would want to get him back, I hope that you can do so without losing a friend, good luck :)

Hi Naomi, this is such a sad situation.  Why can't people with children see what their 'little darlings' are doing at times like this?  Don't they realise that puppies / dogs are not stuffed toys?  :(  If I were you, I'd want to take the pup off them before he's harmed or he harms someone else (in self defence).  It will be awkward with it being a friend and all, but I think the pups welfare is more important and maybe your friend will understand.

Let us know how you get on.

I feel for you naomi,  you are not a failure if I had the power of foresight there are many things in life I wouldn't of done.  Its how you deal with the situation which is all important. You need to get the puppy out. Only you know what type of friendship you have, I personally would air my concerns,  be honest and direct.  Good luck

Naomi
just be careful that whichever way you play this, that this family dont rehome the dog to someone else instead of returning him to you

I agree with everyone else, you should try to get your pup back by whatever means you feel will work best.  However at some time in the future they just might get another pup and it will suffer the same fate unless the child is actually taught how to be considerate to dogs.  Maybe the parents need some help to teach the children.  If the father is as you describe him then he probably isn't setting a very good example to the child so it may be a lost cause in this case.  In my dealings with families with pups I so often want to yell at the child not to do that to the dog but I get much better results by teaching the children HOW to be nice and encouraging the parents to do the same than I do if the parents want to keep telling the child off. That usually results in the child doing it even more.  :(  Maybe you could offer to take the child for an hour or two and teach him with your dogs how he should treat them.  Then if he doesn't behave you can knock the little b******d's head off. :D
Sally

lol@Sally :D :D :D

Get him back out of there.  Don't let the poor dog be miserable and poked about...oh and poke the kid too on your way out with the pup, the nasty little blighter!

If the mum is a friend, just say that you don't think it's working and as a responsible breeder, you are taking him back before there is a serious injury to the kid or the dog.

Poor thing :-(

But legally she cant just take him back without their permission :(

she could attempt too at least.  The mum might hand over the pup and agree with her.  Worth a try?? still poke the kid though!

Don't poke the kid!  You will only end up causing more of fall out with mother!!!

Insted just give evil looks while kissing the puppy and if questiond "evil looks? what evil looks?" and smile sweetly!!!! :)

Rox

lol Ice Queen I was just jokin about pokin the kid! Although no less than he deserves!

The evil looks sounds good!

Lab mad, the child needs more then a poke!!!! ;) 

If someone accused my child of being cruel to my dogs (which they are not I hasten to add) it would immediately put me on the defensive and the person who made the accusation would be swiftly removed from my presence! Far better to take a more subtle approach. Remember, its not the childs fault, its the parents.

I'm afraid I wouldn't have a clue what you should do, but I just want to wish you good luck in getting it all sorted out :-)

erm i know this isnt an excuse but you said the child is only 3, practically a baby himself...so it sounds like its the parents that need educating, if they are letting the kid get away with it then the kid wont know any better, whenever we have had small children around our dogs and they have started poking the dog ive explained how you should treat the dog and they do do it for a while but they do forget and don't realise its hurting the dog.... personally i wouldnt have a puppy with a small child, their teeth are soooo sharp and the child can get hurt just by the puppy being playful but i guess thats up to them.
Could you find out if there are any puppy training groups near by or anyone offering puppy parties, where the child could go along and be educated as to how to treat the pup? then suggest that they take the dog along, even if they want to go you could offer to take the child along?

If all else fails say you want the dog back because it is unfair on the pup and if you loose your friend you loose her, just make sure you don't loose the pup in the process so i guess its all going to be by putting ideas into their head that the dog will become bad in some way and convince them they dont want their child to get hurt..

i wouldnt suggest this but oh's parents were told by one breeder that she had given a dog away and thought the owners were being cruel so she sent her large son round who stole the dog back when it came to the door.......but as i say i wouldnt advise trying that one lol

GreatBritGirl you are brave!  Get ready for the onslaught!:-D

Some great ideas guy's!!

My children are aged 3 and 4 and they know how to handle the pups and the adults.  I have even tried, in our own home, to show him and his mum how to handle the pup and what to do if he starts chewing on something he shouldn't.  The mum is trying her best but her husband, after about an hour of seeing how he interacts is completely different and he encourages the dog to nip and mouth especially when rolling on the floor, so I suppose it is inevitable that the pup is going to think that whoever/whatever is on the floor is a play thing.

I have decided that I am going to speak to all of the family together and see if they are willing to take my training advice and see if they will allow me to teach the boy how to handle and respect the pup before I do anything else.

By the way, this afternoon I was on the phone to the mentioned friend and she told me about her son poking the pup and kicking him.  She knows that there is something going on and hopefully we can work things out.

Kicking the pup!  :(  It's not the pup I'd be kicking!!!  Didn't she think of telling the child not to do it?

i don't see how im being brave.... i mean i dont think everything is always a parents fault and i dont think all little kids should be banned from having animals, my parents got our dog when i was 2 but i didnt do anything to hurt her. I am just saying that in this case im not sure its the kids fault hes hurting the dog, he is only 3 years old after all and if its not up to parents to teach a child, who is it up 2????

If its just one parent then its difficult, i know how you feel i would want the pup back i was just trying to think of ideas incase you can't bring yourself to demand the pup back or if you think they are likely to stop talking to you and keep the pup

I'm not trying to offend anyone and im not saying all situations are like this

I have just spoken to my husband about this situation and he agrees with you lot.  GET HIM BACK.

If I fall out with my friend I don't really care right now as I am more concerend about the pup.  Okay it will cost me more in feeding and rearing and we have also looked at the possibility of not being able to rehome it because of how it's been treated so far but there is going to be a loser in this battle and it's NOT going to be a 9 week old pup!!!!

Thanks for all your support and I will be seeing her tomorrow morning so will let you know how I get on with her.

Wish me luck.

I really appreciate your views GreatBritGirl as we can see both sides and it was really helpful.  I would agree that yes it is partly to do with the parents so don't feel like your offending me or anything I didn't look at it that way.  Being a parent myself I can see your view point.

Good Luck.

You are doing the right thing by that poor little pup.

You go get him and give him a bit of love it's what he deserves.

Let us know how it goes.

Best wishes, 

anyway good Luck, i really hope you get your pup back im sure with a little bit of TLC he will be great and forget all about the problems hes had.

Good luck Naomi.  I hope it goes well.  Let us know how you get on and give the little pup a kiss and cuddle from me.

If he is only 9 weeks old then you will still be able to influence his temperament by positive experiences with your kids.  I'm sure he'll turn out just fine and be suitable for rehoming if that is what you decide to do.  Good Luck
Sally

Unfortunately, unless you have some special agreement with your friend that we're not aware of, you of course have no legal right to remove the puppy so need to tread very carefully.  Perhaps it would be best to try talking nicely to them first?

M.

Oh, good luck!! I do hope you get the pup back, it must be heartbreaking for you. Legally as Brihow collies said, i dont think you have a good postion, so do think long and hard about the parents and how best to get the pup back, by means fair or foul. Whu on earth doesn't the stupid woman stop her child from kicking the pup? apart from anything else, the pup could get damaged, internal injuries and so on /And the husband is the one causing the trouble.....why do some men love to teach their pups to behave this way?

Lindsay
X

M
I agree with you - I also mentioned this earlier. Unfortunately you cannot just "take" a dog that you have sold without the owners consent :(

Hi Naomi
Just checking to see if you are OK. Any news on the pup or your friend? Don't forget you are not alone there is a lot of support out here for you.
Regards
Pushy

Sorry GBG, didn't mean to upset you!  I meant about the bit about them going and stealing the dog ;-)

I have no intention of just taking the puppy.  If the pup is removed from their care it will be by mutual consent and hopefully no bruises. 

Hi Naomi
I wash just reading through your horror story with respect to your poor pup. One thing, in my humble opinion, however is that you should change your heading of "I feel a failure", you are doing everything in your power and more to difuse a nasty situation. The old saying of there's no such thing as a bad dog, just bad owners comes to mind and your friend falls into that category unfortunately. You have done everything you could possibly do in the circumstances. I do hope that you can get your puppy back. If your friend is  a "true" friend, you should be able to be honest with her. That is what true friendship is, after all.
I just wanted to wish you good luck when you go to talk/get her back. I have not been a champdogs member for very long at all but there are always people here for you with help and support and you have done absolutely the right thing. Good luck and best wishes. Let us know how you get on. I'm sure if you can get her back you will more than make up for her bad start in life and no more talk of being a failure please, you would only have failed if you had been aware of the circumstances and done nothing. Kind regards,
Pushy

I do hope you get the pup back. Be frank with the parents, point out that the puppy is a tiny baby and if they had just had a baby brother or sister for the their brat, (maybe choose a different word) there is no way on this God's green earth that they would allow the 3 yr old to poke or kick it. It's their fault for not getting on the kid's case and for not teaching him how behave around a dog.

Just wanted to wish you luck Naomi. Don't feel a failure!

I wanted to wish you luck too,to leave the pup with this little horror would constitute as animal abuse!
You are definatly doing the right thing by taking your pup back,i would rather save a dog and lose a friend. Your pup is the innocent party in all of this,people like your friends do not deserve to have the responsibilty and the honour of owning a dog.
I have to agree with GBG,i would have sneaked in and taken him back by now :p But i would try the nice way first,i would go down the route of saying the dog has a bad health problem which will cost thousands of dollars,that insurance will not cover(just incase)
My breeder will not sell pups to anyone that has kids under 9 years old,which i have always agreed with,even well meaning kids sometimes dont know how to handle a pup properly :(
Please let us know how it goes,we are all thinking of you.I'm sending good vibes your way ;)
Oh and you definatly are not a failure unless you are physic and could have predicted this was going to happen!

christine

good luck in getting the pup back...

any more news on the puppy yet?  i am watching this with interest, especially as i am breeding myself (well the dog anyways!) soon!

Emma

Update.

Went to see my friend last night.  Discussed the situation and we have come up with an idea.

For the next three weeks I will be going there on a daily basis to try and train the kid to respect the pup.  If it doesn't work in three weeks then I get my pup back and they get a full refund.  No bones broken or bruises and I still keep a friend.  However he nearly came home with me last night as the kid stabbed the pup in the side with a pen but the pup bit him back and nothing was said to the pup but the boy was told it served his own right.

I know it's not a nice thing but I hope he doesn't improve in 3 weeks so I can get my pup back.

Thanks guys, I knew I could rely on you for your support. 

That sounds like a good compromise, naomi. If the child can learn how to behave properly with animals it will be a blessing to more than just your pup.
:)

Thats such a wise way forward  Naomi, I hope it will all work out for everyone concerned, specially pup. She must be a very good friend for you to make such a commitment and I admire you for not criticising their parenting skills. All the best. :)