i have a ten year old son with adhd and was hoping to find anyone with a child with similar problems to correspond with me and share help advice and support
sam

http://www.cafamily.org.uk/

Try these i contacted them and they were great at a time when i had no support.

As i have had this experience with my child for the past 6-7 years i have a support group and many contacts where i live, i am also a ips independant parental supporter for the local education authority, i was thinking of doing a support network with any CH members and sharing experiences and advice?
sam

Well there are loads of web-based support groups, try msn my older daughter has a very rare condition and i found people to chat to very easily (all american mind ;) ) and my younger one is the one i contacted contact family for.

thankyou i will try and look on msn and hopefully find some contacts,
sam

Hi,

My son was tested for adhd but instead they found it was another condition - for the life of me I can't remember it's name :o - but not even his school had encountered it before :(

Basically he has no 'body awareness'. Eg if he closes his eyes and you raise his arms and lower them he cannot tell you if they are up/down or whatever. It means he has real problems with his motor skills, balance and co-ordination etc and it effects everything! He can't glance away from what he's reading and go back to where he left it, he fidgets constantly to 'register' where his body is, if he is interupted mid sentance he has to start again - even with simple things like the alphabet. There are a hundred things you wouldn't even think of but when I say to his occupational therapist she puts most of them down to his condition :rolleyes:

On the up side we've found that occupational therapy and exersize have helped and learning martial arts has given him better body awareness and boosted his confidence :) He'll never have neat handwriting but he will be allowed a lap-top to take notes etc once he goes to secondry school. Mind you teaching him to type is a hurdle we've yet to face

Hi,  my 16 year old nephew was diagnosed with ADD (Not the hyperactivity element) Dyspraxia, Aspergers and Dyslexia also something with the acronym DAMP (which we cant remember what it stood for).  Whilst not everyone agrees with it, Ritalin has made the most amazing difference to his behaviour and his life.
bye
Gwen

My gp, put our son on ritalin 10mg when he was 4, he had 3 tablets a day and his weight and height and blood was checked every 3 months, i found the ritalin did have a dramatic effect on his ability to be more calmer and be able to think before he acted, hes now 10 statemented at long last at school has 20 hours a week curriculum support and hes doing great, he is now managing on 2 tablets a day morning and lunchtime, we still have alot of behavioral problems but at long last and after alot of arguments the school is now ADHD aware, this is half the problem automatic labelling bad child, badly behaved.study, study study,
The schools new head is an adhd aware, he has re-routed the schools guidelines with teaching and non-teaching staff and i am very impressed and dont sit by the phone waiting for a call anymore.

My friends lad of 14 has ADD, he was on ritalin too.
However I think he has been weaned off this now.
But his school wasn't really that good with his learning difficulties etc
even though they got extra money for assistant etc etc.
They moved out to Eire and they say he's going to a school that specialises
in learning difficulties and he's come on in leaps and bounds.
They really are very good and work hard to help each individual.
He actually looks forward to going to school and doing his homework etc.
Whereas before in the UK it was all she could do to get him to school.
He's also takes Cod liver oil, which does help him.

There has been some very interesting research and press recently surrounding Fish Oils and OMEGA-3, the link below may be of help, be careful with Cod Liver Oil though as the amount needed to assist with ADHD etc, is so high that can cause an overdose of Vitamin A in the body.  You need fish oils that are higher in EPA than DHA (not be be confused with Cod Liver Oil)

fish oils

Gwen - DAMP = Defecit in attention, motor control and perception

Wishfairy - were you thinking of Dyspraxia?

I take my hat off to all of you parents who have children with added difficulties, it's very hard work.  I work in a college for students 16-25 with special needs.

My partners little boy, lives with his Mum but we have regular access, has learning difficulties.
He also has problems with his motor skills, speech and hearing and socail skills.
He is 6.5yrs old but the psychologist has said that he is on a par with a 3.5yrs old.
He is at mainstream school but the Education Authority want him to go to a 'Special School' miles away.
My partner Dave, Karen his ex and I don't want this and don't think he would benefit as he is so shy it has took him all this time to start talking to the teachers at his school.
The teachers say they are happy for Michael to stay at the school.
The psychologist has banded him a D. The school think he is an E band. How would this affect his learning abilities?
Michael is so quiet it worries me, although his Mum & Dad are used to this.
Since my partner and I have been together, 3yrs, Karen says she has seen a great improvement in Michaels speech and social skills.
I helped her get him out of nappies which at the time she thought of as interfering but has since thanked me for. She has on occassion asked Dave to ask my advice, I don't interfere on purpose, I have always said Michael is Karen and Daves son.
This ,I think, is because my son who is 14 now helps him. Teaching him how to work his cars tracks and playing ball and such things.
The problem I have is with my eldest daughter who has 4 daughters. She is lucky enough to have 4 very, very intelligent girls aged 8,5,2,1.
Often the 2yr old will show Michael how to do something, I think they help each other.
My 5yr granddaughter takes Michael under her wing. When they teach him something new it really builds up his confidence.
The thing is the kids accept Michael for who he is but my daughter is always saying that it is the way we treat him.
She always has a reason for why he is how he is.
I don't want to fall out with my daughter but I have become very attached to this little boy, he is so loving, it is starting to p**s me off the way my daughter goes on aabout him. Her little girls can accept him so why can't she.
My other kids are 14,16 and 21 and they don't have a problem with Michael.
At first it was difficult for me when we took Michael out because when people stared I wanted to tell them where to get off. I am getting used to this now.
Sorry for been so long winded but if I talk to Dave aabout this he gets upset.
D4wn

Perhaps your daughter is both embarrassed and jealous of the little boy, she'll never admit it but i think she may feel that you aren't giving her and her children enough attention.
When a child has a problem it isn't the parents (or you) that notice it, it is others that see it more.

i take it that there is a statement in operation, next review meeting demand that the lea dont name a special school and insist that he stays at the school he is used to and knows the routine
If you need any help contact IPSEA they are on the net and are very very helpful.
sam.

Just seen mygirls post, she's right our other child suffers because of all the attention our son gets at home and school,her behaviour suffers at school just so she can get attention, she also mirror copies the behaviour she see's our son do.

Mygirl,
I thought of that as soon as Dave & I got together. I am very close with my daughter and the kids.
We have discussed it and you are right she wouldn't admit jealousy.
I thought that at 23yrs of age she would understand, after all when Keirah-leah 2yr old was in hospital at 7weeks old with whooping cough and double pneumonia we rallied round. Mandy was told that her baby would be severely handicapped, blind, deaf, unable to walk, she is so lucky that this didn't happen. If it had would she feel this way about Michael????
Keirah-leah was in hospital for 9 weeks and was given a 10% chance of survival. When she came out at 16weeks she weighed less than her birth weight.
Mandy just doesn't appreciate how lucky she is to have her baby and her not to be affected in any way.
You are right we don't notice Michaels difficulties, although I was very aware at first.
I also have a 16yr old with a 'none-visible' medical condition so maybe I came to accept Michael a bit easier.
What gets to both Dave & I is that the kids accept Michael and ask for him every time we see them, we don't want their mothers attitude to change the way they feel about him.
Mandy did at one point say she didn't want the girls to come to our house when Michael was there but I put her in her place on that occassion.
What really makes me feel good is the way Dave and Michael are with each other, they adore each other. Michael is Daves life. He 'phone Michael every night, even when Michael is not very talkative, and sees him at least twice a week. We live 30 miles away and Dave doesn't drive.
A lot of Fathers walk away. Maybe this is a problem with Mandy as her father just left one day and never got in touch again. She was only 4 at the time.

gsd sam,

Thanks for the info I will tell Dave & Karen, as I say I don't go to the meetings yet, they put me in the picture when they come back and we discuss it then. 

D4wn

It is a very sad situation, and all i can suggest is make time for your daughter and maybe she would appreciate that you also have a seperate life from her, she has probably had your undivded attention and then this little boy comes along.
Unfortunately in this world there are an awful lot of people out there that are not tolerant and understanding, i wouldn't fret too much as i'm sure she will get used to the little boy eventually you just have to help to bring her round.
It makes my skin crawl sometimes when you hear of how children as young as 2 can accept just about anyone yet a grown man/woman can't ! :rolleyes:
My daughter can't run with her school friends and do they care? Do they heck! and does she care? Nope! :)

Mandy has 3 younger siblings. The youngest was born when she was 9. I would have thought she had got used to it.
Although we are very close we don't interfere in each others lives normally, we are just there to help each other when things go wrong.
Another thing came to mind. I was very young when Mandy was born and we have often felt more like sisters/friends than mother and daughter.
It does p**s mes off with adults though.
I have a friend, both she and her 11yr old daughter have cerebral palsy, when we go out Linda holds on to me and Jessica goes in her wheelchair.
We have it down pat when people stare. Jessica wheels over to them and says. " Me and my Mum are like this 'cos we stared at someone just like you are doing".
Jessica says she would rather come over for a chat and ask what is wrong with her.
On one occasssion we were looking for shoes for Jess when this little boy came over and said hello. His mother called him away and when Jess was trying shoes on we heard her tell the little boy that "The little girl doesn't need shoes after all she can't walk". I was furious. Jessica can walk, just not far.

Oh Dawn you get used to it, and you get hardened by it which i think is the awful thing. Years ago you wouldn't get me saying anything in public, Now? I never shut up lol and will always say my point.
My daughter was in plaster casts (another great idea from the doctors :rolleyes: ) and a woman said to her child "That's what happens when you are naughty" I can't repeat my reply!
Unbelievably a woman at nursery said to me once why can't she walk and i explained she had had botox injections in her legs and she said "why on earth would you want to do that when it's only for vanity reasons" ?????
The ignorance of others is mind boggling ;)

But the good people well outway the bad people (or ignorant ones)

Sarah

Mygirl,

Are the 'Botox' injections the treatment they offer for Cerebral Palsy?
If they are I think that must be what Linda was offered for Jessica. With Jess been 10yrs old at the time Linda and her husband discussed it with Jess and allowed her to make the decision whether to have them or not.
Apparently there is quite a risk??
Jessica decided not to go ahead. She said she was happy the way she is. Quite a few of her family members suffer to varying degrees with CP, her cousin Jordan cannot walk and also has mental handicap on top of it, so she has been brought up to cope well. As she says she can walk a lot of the time and she uses her chair only for long journeys.
D4wn

Yes botox are offered for CP but my daughter has spina bifda (mild) and her spinal cord was tethered making her feet turn inwards and upwards.
The botox was used to relax certain muscles, which it did to a degree but her bones were forming (or going solid) so they had to operate in the end before it got worse.
My daughter is the same, she can walk alot but gets pain on long walks so relies on her chair then.
:)

Have you tried cod liver capsuls? I was told to try this with my son when I was talking about this awhile back on here cause I won't put him on any drugs...The teachers said that he had ADHD and did a number of tests, went to the doctors and he said it sounds more like boredom then ADHD...Now my son is in another school to work on his behaviour...he was bored in class (grade 3) he was alot more advanced then the other children and this teacher wasn't willing to give him grade 4 work in certain subjects...The school he is in now works on the compulsary subjects only and how to act in the classroom (raising hands, following rules, ect) and on good behaviour they do something fun every friday...Eventually the goal is to get him back into his other school but he really likes this one but this one is only for problem children so to speak.....

I thought it was Fish Body Oil that was recommended for ADHD rather than Cod Liver Oil?  A homoeopathic treatment for ADHD is Tuberculinium which may be worth exploring.

It certainly is Fish Oil and NOT Cod Liver Oil though as the amount needed to gain the level of EPA's needed to assist with ADHD etc, is so high that can cause an overdose of Vitamin A in the body.  You need fish oils that are higher in EPA than DHA (not be be confused with Cod Liver Oil).  I did put a link in my post a bit higher up, to some interesting research being done on this subject. 

At my nephews previous school (expelled due to bad behaviour, unforutnatley) they specialiised in Dyslexic children, and also accepted associated behavioural problems (just not as much as Johns!)  they insisted that the kids kept drinking water throughout the day, saying that research had shown that keeping well hydrated had significant benefits on ability to learn and behaviour.
bye
Gwen

Hi All, i have 3 children, taraus who is 8 nearly 9 as he says, ryan who is 7 and tanisha who is 4. Ryan has adhd and was diagnosed at 4 after i threatened to leave him at my gps surgery' sounds cruel i know but no one would listen to me. I had said from 18 months that something was different with him and by the time he reached his 2nd birthday he no longer slept. He was always climbing out the top floor window and dangling off the window sill, we lived on a very busy road then and he thought it was funny because all the cars would stop and people would get out. He would jump off the top of the bannister rather than walking down the stairs as he thought this was quicker, and so the stories could go on :-(  The final straw for me was when he was 3 1/2, he would have terrible rages and was so strong, anyway something had triggered one of these rages off and i had to lock my son and daughter who was only 6 months then in a room as i could'nt stop him and ended up with a black eye and bruised ribs. That was when i made the decision that the doctors would either refer him or they would have to get social services in to take him as i felt i was letting him down as a mother as i could'nt get anyone to listen and i was letting my other 2 children down as they were in constant danger from him. I pointed out to my then gp, that gp stood for General Practioner and not specialist in ADHD and if they told me he did not have it then he would never have to hear from me again. Well needless to say ryan did and does have it as well as a very unusual sleep problem. He is currently on ritalin and 2 lots of different sleeping tablets, which has just been increased to 5 nights on and 2 nights off, but like most my biggest problem is now the effect all of this has had on my other 2 children. Taraus is now having to recive counselling as he as had break down due to the way ryan has treated him and the way he has had to cope with all the attention he demands from me. Tanisha has grown up watching ryan and is also mimicking him down to a T and so all of us are now having family threapy. All sounds very dramatic but you do learn to live with it and make the most of what you've got. Ryan has many other qualities which are easy to over look, he can be extremly loving, highly intelligent and adores all animals. My hope is to get him through school as best as i can and hopefully be able to support him in the life he chooses to follow from there, emma.

Sorry sorry sorry :( ment to put fishoil, hubby was talking to me....Thankfully someone corrected my post :)

Emma are you getting plenty of support from external sources?  Do you belong to support groups or get respite care, etc?

Has your child seen a member of the CAMHS Team? or get support from a Child Psychologist?

It's not easy to find help or ask for it, but it can be done and it is absolutely essential for the sake of your sanity and the wellbeing of your family.  It sounds like you have had a traumatic few years and I wish you the very best of luck.

Jacky

Hi Jacky, thank-you for all your suggestions, we are only just now starting to see the CAMHS team and have had our first appointment recently. We do not get any respite or help with groups and unfortunatly no willing family members, apart from my brother and his wife. They are a great help to us but have got their hands full now with my 2 nephews aged 18months and 2months and my niece ellie who is 5, so i do not like to ask but they do offer and i know they are there for us. Things are easier now that ryan has got older but i still feel that the whole system works to slow and is very hard to get help in the first place. We have had a really hard time but i know alot of family's have worse and without my doggies for my peace of mind and husband who takes over, so i get my sanity back i may feel very different. I am starting a new thread though for some suggestions i need so as not to take up all sam's post :-) Emma.

hi guys,
my son has an appointment at the hospital monday to see if he has adhd,will let you all know what happens,
mandy

Tanisha my 4 year old grandaughter has ADHA and I do not think her mother could have coped if we did not live next door, Tanish can go to bed at 11.pm and be back up at 2am she bangs her head on the wall and is always on the go her mum is anorexic and has frequent blood transfusions and they have another child 3 years old, she is on melatomin to help her sleep but nothing else can be done for her intill she is 6 years old they say

My son now 10 has had ritalin from age 4-5 years, the pshychiatrist we see is useless and i want to go to out of my designated health authority to a hospital in huddersfield where i have been told there is a consultant specialising in adhd, i have approached my gp but always get told that if he refers then it will come back as im not under that area? id be prepaired  to cost it myself but im getting no where, the person i see at the moment does nothing to help infact its always me telling her what new things ive come up with the info I have seeked out and the problems associated with adhd I have read up on, i hate going to see her at the child and adolecent unit but looks like ive no choice.even my lad says missing school was a waste of time, he asked her how long do i have to take pills for and was told we'll have to wait and see.
she will just continue getting paid for nothing, so many school review meetings we have had and she has never attended just put in a report of what i have told her never offers advice or help herself???

You can do a search through websites such as DrFoster.co.uk and specialistinfo.com to find consultants who specialise in ADHD.  You can ask for a referral elsewhere.  Sam does your son see a Child & Adolescent psychiatrist or psychologist?  Can you get any backup from local support groups to assist in a referral somewhere more appropriate?  Britney please don't accept that nothing can be done for your granddaughter until she is older.  That is completely and utterly wrong.  There is so much that can be put into place to support her development and assist with her condition.  I would suggest to anyone that your local support group would be the first place to start as the people that run these organisations see the same story over and over again.  Also, it is beneficial to have a social worker or health visitor to act as advocate to you.  Where I work we actively encourage social worker support as it is invaluable despite negative press. 

you might want to have a look here

jolin do you have personal experience of the link you recommend?

i browsed on this link but to tell you the truth i read some very contradictory features about adhd contrary to what i have read medically myself and had info sent to me from an adhd institute in america.

thanks anyway
sam

no I don't have personal experience of the link but thought it might be interesting to read for Sam.
I have a daughter who has special needs and ADHD is just one of her many problems.
So I am dealing with the issues of it on a daily basis. Therefore I wouldn't dismiss something like Kinesiology out of hand.
Haven't yet came across anything that works for my daughter and she has been under the care of ADHD specialists since aged 3 and also undergone numerous types of therapy.
Always interested to read ideas about anything that might help.

Kind regards,
Linda

I have a four year old who we are sure has behavior problems we started him on the fish oils after reading this site and we seem to have turned a corner I know he has only been on them just over a week but we have a quieter child who settles easier at night and doesnt spend all day shouting our nieghbour has noticed the difference as well so I am hoping that these will help

thats great news maggie.
keep us posted with any news.
kind regards,
linda :-)

My 6 year old has just been to the doctors regarding ADHD- the doctor has referred us to a specialist and we are waiting for an appointment- in the meantime does anyone have any info on what they'll do at the specialists, how they'll test him, and what help and advice is on offer to us?  Also someone has mentioned that he will now be classed as *disbled*?- is this true?  Will he get one to one teaching support etc?  What are the chances of him growing out of this? 

We seem to be at the beginning of a very long road so any information will be greatfully received:-)

Stacey x x x

P.S; I have briefly scanned the net but not found answers to my specific questions.

Hi Stacey, i have a son who has adhd and a daughter who is being referred for further tests. The best place for you to start is the ADDIS site online, i have come across this and it is very useful and also you can contact them and they will help you all they can. My son was diagnosed 31/2 years ago and i still do not have half the answers i wish i had but have met some fantastic people on here recently which have proved to be a godsend (jackyjat) :-D hopefully they will come along later and also give you some advice, all the best Emma.

Hi Stacey,
Diagnosis normally comes from a psychiatric assessment of the child rather than any specific tests. The psychiatrist will ask you questions about you're child and will also observe his behaviour probably over a period of a few visits.
Once a firm diagnosis is in place the family are usually offered behaviour therapy to help with the issues that are being dealt with, at this stage school could call on psychological services for an assessment of what is required at school and open A Record of Needs (Scotland)
A Statement of Needs (England) this would allow yourself and the education authorities to decide on what is required on a day to day basis for you're son to get the best from his education, therapy required, does he need an SEN auxiliary etc.
I have noticed some people refer to people with ADHD as being disabled but I myself regard it as having special needs. The reason I say this is because my daughter has ADHD and many other problems and she is registered disabled with physical problems also.
There are many sites on the web dealing with ADHD some good and some bad, a couple you might find useful are adders and
addiss
You can also find an overview of what a statement of needs are here
I hope this was some help, if I can help you any more pm or email me.
The best of luck with you're little one.
Kind regards,
Linda

For anyone who is reading this board and has an interest in trying the Fish Oils that we have mentioned, please make sure that they contain an EPA content of 500mg and a lower DHA content.  Lots of the "cheaper" brands available have quite a low EPA content.  morEPA is one brand that provides the nutrients in the correct proportion for a reasonable cost.

Stacey, to access the highest level of support for your child it is beneficial (if not essential) to have an official diagnosis.  This will mean that your child is protected by disability legislation. The Disability Discrimination Act (DDA) protects disabled people. The Act sets out the circumstances in which a person is "disabled". It says you are disabled if you have:

a mental or physical impairment
this has an adverse effect on your ability to carry out normal day-to-day activities
the adverse effect is substantial
the adverse effect is long-term (meaning it has lasted for 12 months, or is likely to last for more than 12 months or for the rest of your life).

Personally I feel there is no stigma to such a "label" these days and there is plenty of back up to protect such people from discrimination.  The Disability Rights Commission are amazing at their job.  At the college where I work, the students are described as having 'special learning needs', they range in ability but all need a bit of extra help to support their learning.

Please feel free to PM me.

PS Although Linda is correct in what she says, diagnosis can also come from psychological assessment too, instead of psychiatric, often under the umbrella of CAMHS (Child & Adolescent Mental Health Services).

correct jacky, was a bit late last night when I wrote mine and I've got the flu, not quite with it at the minute.
kind regards,
Linda :-)

Thanks for the info Jackyjat:-) so once a diagnosis has been made will my Son automatically be put on the disabled register (if this is the way it's done?) or will I have to apply for this?  Also how long from diagnosis (approx) will we be talking about before extra help in school is concerned?  At the minute he is already taken out a couple of times a week for special help- will it continue like this or will he have a key worker of some sort to assist him in the classroom?  I ask because I know there is a lady called Wendy who goes into my Daughters class to help out in general but her main role is to assist one of the boys with his learning difficulties (3 full days per week).

Once again thank you:-)

Stacey x x x 

Linda, don't worry, I hope you feel better soon!!  I just wanted to complete the picture a bit more fully, knowing the association some people have with the word "psychiatrist".

Stacey, I will PM you but just for every else's benefit, there is no such thing as a disabled register.  There isn't a list of those people who are "disabled" but rather those people who have an official diagnosis made by the medical profession that then affords them extra help and protection to ensure they aren't disadvantaged by their diagnosis.