Does anybody know whether there is a difference in being a Guardian or a legal Guardian ??????

My second husband has just signed a document from my daughters school as it asked for a parent or guardian not legal guardian.

My ex husband has seen it and has lost it saying that he has no right and he will take me to court to make sure he is never allowed to do it again. There is alot more besides what he is trying to do this but won't bore you with it but just thought if anybody knew anything before I have to get in touch with solicitors etc !! Could well do without this at the moment but thats life for you !! :)

Lucy

I should imagine as mike is now her stepfather he has the right to sign a document as guardian but a legal guardian is the one on the custody papers you will have got from court are you joint guardians of your daughter? or sole custodian? I had this with my sons father he was granted joint custody with me those I had residence we have only had a couple of disagreements but the thing is to try to keep things as amicable as possible through gritted teeth.

I am absolutely seething :(

It is a SRB ( school record book) to sign every week to say she has done her homework !!!

We are joint guardians!!

I have rung the school and had a chat with Matron and apparently he has upset a few members of staff ! She has said to ignore him as he is wrong and not to worry about it as I must have enough on my plate having a new baby !! LOL They say you can never pull the wool over Matrons eyes !! LOL

I have mailed him and put him straight as can't speak to him face to face as have an urge to tell him where to go which is not good !! It would make me feel so much better though !! :D

Lucy

Have you seen Carla' e-mail by the way ??

I will send you the link to waht the prob is.

Lucy

well we are my grandsons legal guardians now. this means we have the final say in anything regarding him. if his mother ever turned up again she would have to take us to court to have any say in his upbringing.

We have been finding out about this recently. Just because you have remarried doesn't (unfortunately) give your new husband any rights, for example, signing documents at school, hospitals (when you need parental permission etc). We are now applying to the courts for my new husband to have a residance order put in place, which will give me, my ex and my husband equal control. We outlined to my very awkward ex that if he cared about his kids then it makes sense to allow this as things could be difficult if, for example, I was out and my ex was unavailable and there was some kind of emergency. Hope this helps. Good luck. PS you can do this through the county court yourself for £90 providing you have in writing that your ex has agreed, otherwise we were quoted £300-£500 to do it through a solicitor!!!

Lorraine

Thanks for that as it sounds like a v good idea.

I am sick and tired of him now.

It has been six years and he is still there. I moved half way across the country and he followed to make sure he was still in my face. I know he loves my daughter and I will never deny access but I am not his property now and he needs to move on.

I think the prob is I chucked him out and he still has never let go. Still show her photos of our wedding :( Bit sad really.

Lucy

Its been 2 years for me and my ex ios still very bitter and twisted. He can't stand that I am happy with Jon.

Not a day goes by that we don't have a row, including today

Took my ex 13 years to get over it :D :D Even now ..16 years on , he still has a dig every now and again ..he is in the process of getting his 2nd divorce too ;)

Lets hope his second divorce will take his mind of the first !!LOL :D

It is the only thing that really does wind me up. Why can't ex's get a life ?

cos they are too busy trying to ruin ours :rolleyes:

they just can't stand for us to be happier now than when we were miserable with them. another blazing row this morning with mine...its just like still being married :rolleyes:

Hiya Lucy

For some men there is no hope.

My parents were divorced for 26 years before my Dad died. Every time I or anyone else saw him, all he talked about was "the old days". Mum, her family, the rows etc etc, etc. He never went out with another female. Even at our wedding he had to be told to behave, and when i cleared his house, he still had all their wedding photos.

My mum never stopped access, but I wish she had. He was the sole cause of my heavy drinking at 16. Luckily I had enough brains to stop.

Sounds like lorrianes suggestion might be the best.

Some just can't let go. Just remind yourself he is a sad, lonely little man, whilst you have a wonderful husband & fantastic kids.

Julia & Hooligans

What is a bit worrying Flo has before come back from daddies and said ' we were looking thro your wedding photos:(

Oh Julia it must have been hard, what is Flo going thro ? :(

Lucy
xx

So glad you have that right ! He is a lucky boy. :)

I do however dispair that my ex husband can be so silly on this when my husband now is one of the nicest and most genuine people I could have ever met and treats my daughter although she is his own but has never lost sight that he is not her father and my ex husband is and will say nothing but praise about him to her face. A different story when she is not about as he can see what a misery he made my life and unfortunately can still do now :(

Why can't he just give up and let us live our lives in peace ?

A very pissed off Lucy
xx

If you are living together as a couple (married or not) the partner of the mother or father of children is automatically a guardian so he has done nothing wrong in signing the book, tell your ex to sling his hook, sounds to me like he just wants to make you both stressed over silly things. I 've been in this situation myself but me and my now husband decided from the off that we would never get stressed over an ex, they get satisfaction from making your lifes stressful, ignore him, don't waste money on a solicitor enjoy your now family and ex will eventually give up when he gets no joy :)

Not when it comes to things like consent for medical reasons etc .

If I let rip and started arguing then it would end up in a very big legal battle and I love my daughter too much to go there. She is the innocent one here.

Lucy
xx

thought you was talking about a school homework book, soory didn't know you were on about legal stuff

unfortunately it is all over a school homework book :(

That is why I am so peed off.

Aren't exes such a pain?
I am a member of NACSA (www.nacsa.co.uk) and there is loads of advice on the site to do with child support and access issues, but you can by posting on the board get info from other users re the legalities of this. I'm sure your ex is confusing 'guardian' with 'parental responsibility', though I've recently found out your current hub can go to court an apply for PR. My kids want hubs to adopt them (and hubs wants to as well)but we know my ex won't go for this though he never sees them or supports them so we've decided to go for PR as a start.
The only problem with the site is limited access to non members but there is some info and a help line number. If you need any more info or would like me to post a message on your behalf let me know.

Hi jesseann,

My new husband also wanted to adopt my children (as my ex doesn't really have much to do with them) BUT for him to adopt them, we have to bascially 'throw' their birth certificate away, and I have to adopt them aswell, leaving them with only an adoption certificate....crazy as it sounds. My solicitor explained that they are trying to lobby against this legislation but for the foreseeable future it will stand. I would also have to go through social services and have assesments to see if i am capable of looking after MY OWN CHILDREN. So we have decided to stick with the parental responsibility/residance order in the meantime and hope that one day the government will enter the real world of 'life after divorce'.

I have just had to attend court re: access and parental responsibility by my ex .
It makes me mad that after three years when the novelty of his new girlfriend has worn off that he wants to come back into the childrens life as though nothing has happened :(
I was the one that sorted out my boys schooling etc ( even winning an appeal to get into the right schol) while he wasnt even interesed where they went and never even asked and then he has the cheek to tell the court he misses them !!!
ooo I better go before I get all wound up again .

yes...we would love to legally adopt our grandson. but according to the courts his mother (who abandoned him at 8 months) would have to give her consent!. as we couldnt find her after my son died that would be difficult.

It amy be worth looking into though, as if she's not around and can't be found surely something can be done
Fi xx

my dad (step) adopted me and my brother, but my mum had to aswell, now when we are asked for a birth certificate we give the original, and the adoption certificate