HI,
We think tilly has settled in really well and adjusted to our 'rules' for her. The only thing that is really bothering me that i'd appreciate some advice on, is the way she reacts when we leave her. It's not as though it's for hours and hours - when we first got her i got her slowly used to being left in the hall (with access to her bed and the kitchen) for 10 mins one day, 20 the next and so on. She was ok - reacted as i'd expect, but she's got no better since - she still goes crazy when we get back, a little bit of submissive weeing which i can cope with, but it's heartbreaking the way she squeals and cries and jumps about. Even after 1 hour. Surely she must know by now that i'll always come back? We've had her 6 weeks now. At first she wasnt destructive, but the other week she wrecked my carpet in the hall, scratched it all up behind the door, so now she has to be left in the kitchen, which makes me feel even worse about leaving her.
I cant distract her with treats or toys as she doesnt touch them til i get home.
Any advice? I know she will grow out of it but in july we are away for 5 days and she will go to my mum's (she goes onece a week with me so she knows the house and family) and my mum's had to book the week off work because i dont want her to be left even for those few hours. I've heard i shouldnt fuss her before i go out or immediately i get back, until she has calmed down ? does this work?
Lynz and Tilly x

Hi, you are right about not fussing her, I ignore mine when I go out and also ignore them when I come back in, I dont make a fuss of any of them until ive sat down with a cuppa!!!! they will learn, I found a cage is a great way of having a non-distructive dog, mine used to like chewing wires, so I started to cage him, but, I only give the kong filled with goodies when I go out, so they associate me going out with "good things". Even when I let the dogs out of their cages I dont speak to them, just open the door and let them out into the garden, its hard to do, but I found it has worked for me. Now mine are not that well behaved!!!! my favourite patio tub, is no more!!! Cookie and Pearl destroyed it last night, and it was raining, but, they had great fun and were lovely and muddly and dirty !!!!!!!! they even came in the house with "smiles" on their faces, I was not amused. I still cant find the plants that were in the tub. LOL.

thanks irene... i cant bring myself to cage her, im a bit anti-cage/crate altho i've never experienced using one so my opinions count for nothing much! However at her age and after having her for 6 weeks i think it would be wrong to introduce something so drastic, she will feel she's being punished i think.
Thnaks for the advice re: ignoring her - it's so hard though isnt it, to push them aside and not try to calm them!
But i'll definitely try it.
I doubt the kong tip will work with her - i've tried leaving various favourite toys/treats when i go but she doesnt want to know, including new things and things she only gets when i leave her. I hate to think of her sitting behind the door whimpering and lonely while im trudging round morissons!
Lynz and Tilly x

I heard somewhere that most of the anxiety your dog experiences when you are out is in the first few minutes. I don't know how accurate that is, but with my 8 month Border terrier I always give him a Kong as I am heading out with something tasty (peanut butter, smelly cheese, sausage etc) stuffed into it. I tease him with it then leave it by the back door. He doesn't even notice me leaving and so far so good. The only things he has damaged have been things I have been daft enough to leave on the floor ( and some freshly posted Springsteen tickets!!).
Good luck.

Do a search for crates and my user id and you'll see that I was very much like you - didn't like crates. But at 6 months old I had to crate my girl and in a much earlier post I tell how I went about it.

I also do what Irene does - they get nice stuffed kongs when I go out. A lot of times they'll still be stuffed when I come home, but it keeps them occupied for the time we're leaving and then when we come home if they are still partially stuffed the dogs will go back and finish them or bring them to me to help get the stuck bits out.

Wendy

Hi Irene
I have just joined CD & find it very interesting, I am due to get my Bichon Frise pup in 5 weeks so I am getting prepared. I was interested to read about a cage & think I will be using one for a safe retreat if Molly wants peae & quiet & also for when we go out. One thing I am not clear about is what is a KONG? also any tips for introducing Molly to the cage.
Cheers Pauline

I also was against cages of any kind, have never caged a dog in my life till we got our wee pap, but from the 2nd nite on he slept in the cat cage beside our bed and was really content to be there (no crying and immediately settled down and slept) Now he is bigger (5 months) he has a larger crate that sits in the computer room beside my pc. He goes in there for time out (if hes been nawty) or to sleep at nite and he recognises it as his only little den. He has blankets and toys in there and have started giving him his breakfast in there while I wake up. Best of both worlds really. I get to wake up slowly and he gets breakfast in bed. Having said that..Hes running round free for the rest of the day unless I cant supervise him and then he has short periods back in it. BTW ours is a collapsible one that can be folded flat and taken away with us if the need arises.

Tilly's Mum

Ignoring your dog for a few mins before and a few mins on your return does work. When you come home, go make a cup of tea or unpack the shopping without looking at, touching or acknowledging her. It might sound cruel to ignore your dog but it is only for a couple of weeks til she gets used to being on her own for a while. It is probably kinder than having her crying after you for a long time to come.

Get her used to being apart from you for short spells while you are at home - leave her in another room for a few minutes and build the time up.

Don't worry about her not eating when you are out. You are your dogs food supply. With you gone they don't know when they'll get fed again so they save what they have for the duration. As soon as you get back they know they will get more food so they can safely eat what they saved. They are real smart.

Good luck.

thanks dog behaviour... that explains the eating thing then! i'll tell my mum - mindy is the same even though shes lived with them for 4 years now! Makes sense i guess. plus its not much fun eating alone!
I'm planning to try leaving her for small periods as sugested i really dont want her to grow up nervous or silly over me, shes just very very attached to me at the moment. I think her being a rescue doesnt help much.
Thanks again for the great advice
Lynz and Tilly
x

Glad you think you've got something to try. I've never been without a dog for 30 years now and 6 of the ones I've had have been rescue dogs so am used to the problems you can get.

Although she doesn't eat what you leave her, I'd still leave a stuffed Kong or Buster cube - at least it will give her something to play with until you get home.

Crates are fine as long as they are introduced slowly and the dog in question sees it as a "den" - you can tell if this is so because sometimes it will go into the crate of its own accord.

It isn't IMHO a good idea to put a dog in a xrate and then leave it for a long time, the time needs to be built up and it goes without saying that it is very unkind to leave a dog in a crate for hours on end :(

But they are great for keeping house and pup safe if owner is popping out for a bit, and also for going away with the dog :) I would suggest removing collars when dog is in the crate.

My dog is very good at being left (don't crate her in fact) adn I did build it up very slowly, but also used child gates at home so that she could see me but was not always with me, and she got chews and Kongs during this time. If she whined i ignored her, but when I did bring her out, it was always calmly and when she had stopped whining and seemed relatively settled.

Don't know if that helps at all, it could be that you are responding to her accidentally when she whines so she is learning that it works? Anywy, good luck :)

Lindsay

ohh dear. had to go to the hairdresser this morning at ten, tried everything to get her into the kitchen and she wasnt having any of it, she was cowering under chairs and allsorts, so like an idiot i thought id trust her in the hall for an hour... came back to more carpet excavation.

Ah well.
Lynz and Tilly (in disgrace!)