We adopted a shepherd mix (female) from the local shelter about two months ago. She had been a stray, and the people at the shelter told us she was approximately 7 months old. We chose her because she seemed calm and self-contained. She wasn't barking and jumping like the other dogs in the cages. And, after two months with Sasha, I have to admit, she has many positive traits. She walks on a leash without choking herself, although she does pull. She was completely house-broken when we got her. She's never tried once to jump on the furniture. She has been fairly easy to train: she sits, lies down, and comes when called (unless she is VERY distracted - we're still working on it). Compared with some of the problems I've read on this board, I should be counting my blessings, right?

Maybe I'm the one who needs help, mental help. Sasha drives me crazy. She makes me wish we'd never gotten a dog. I hate her sometimes, I cringe whenever she brings a toy for me to throw, yet again. I can't fully concentrate on anything. Sometimes I just tie her out back and ignore her little plaintive yips by the back door, because I need some time to myself, without looking down and seeing a pair of brown eyes looking at me hopefully. I'd like to go to the bathroom without opening the door to find her lying there. As an unemployed mom (for now), I realize she's just velcroed herself onto me because I'm around more than anybody else. I walk her, at least 3 or 4 long walks a day. I do most of the training. But she just seems insatiable. As much attention as I dish out, she just seems to want more and more.

Will she outgrow this neediness? Is there something that I'm doing wrong?

from what your saying....it sounds like your puppy is just acting like a puppy. ai think she is just craving the atention that she missed out on as a puppy. I think she is jsut trying to make a bond with a person that she can hold on to forever. She is jsut trying to find someone that she can run to when she is scared and someone who she can be loyal to for the rest of her life. ALthough it may be tireing at times, putting her in the yard once in a while is not wrong. She will need to spend some time alone but she will always need the loveyou are able to give her. The fact hat you have an animalt hat pputs her love and trust into should be something you cherish and not reject. She will love you no matter what you do , a dog is an animal that will love you and see past your flaws and look at you as an absolutly amazing being. She seams like a good dog and putting her in the back yard is not wrong. You are right nd you do neeed some time to yourself but when u c her following you around, u nee to remember she looks up to u and loves u undoubtedly and her ongoing love will always be there when you need her. As she follows u around she feels as if she is pleasing you, not annoying you, I hopw this helps you,
Samantha

Hi judy

I think you will have a great relationship with her, but it maybe needs a little "fine tuning" to tweak the bits that are making you feel irritated :)

I agree she is trying to bond with and hold on to you, to be a stray and in a rescue as a pup must be very hard and so she has not had the benefit of guidance until you got her. She does sound really good, but what you need to donow is to just take a little bit of control.

For example, when you have finished playing ball with her, stand up straight and say "That's enough" in a normal voice, then make sure you totally ignore any of her efforts to play. As she is a rescue and may be a bit sensitive over this kind of thing, i would perhaps engage her attention in a different way, such as giving her a stuffed Kong toy so that she doenst feel too unnerved by your firm insistence on not playing.

Eventually she will come to realise that those words mean she will not get to play again and she may as well just chill out ;)

She may offer an "extinction burst" where she seems to get a lot worse, but this is just because she is trying harder than ever to get you to throw the ball. Keep strong and she will stop, but don't reward her with too much attention - just maybe another calm but firm "That's enough" and turn away.

YOu do have to be careful with rescue dogs because they can get so disheartened and can be sensitive. I would also recommend buying "The Perfect Puppy" by Gwen Bailey, this will give you real help and also one of the recent rescue dog books which details problems such as neediness and how to overcome them, there is one by Gwen Bailey and also one by Carol Price.

Lindsay

Hi Judy,
Remember you haven't had Sasha for very long yet, and she's still trying to find out her role in your family. She's doing all she can to please and appease you. Remember, in a dog's mind, the worst punishment ever is to be isolated and ignored, so afterwards she will feel she has to cling even closer to 'apologise' for whatever it is she's done to warrant it.

As she gradually starts to feel secure she will relax, little by little, and loosen her desperate attachment to you. If you handle this right, you will be rewarded with a devoted, loyal family member. Good luck. :)

Sounds a lot like I felt with my first breed which was a Belgian Shepherd, I was always tripping over her, and it was like she never rested. Much as I loved here my current breed is just a much better fit. Don't get me wrong they love affection but they don't have that neediness that I found wearing. My freind owns Welsh Springers, and I have looked after Cockers, and they are the same, wouldn't choose to live with that sort of slavish adoration!

Shephereds tend to be very attached to one person in the family, and with her being a rescue the trait will be even more noticeable. You may be a ble to cool the relationship a little, but not much I weouldn't expect.

A good freind of mine has a houseful of dogs belonging to hubby and herself, and the GSDs are hubby's and they cry when he leaves the room! Again as they have all been rescues it is probably accentuated.

Hi

Perhaps its not the dog...perhaps its more a case of the whole responsibility of what you have taken on is just dawning on you? To be honest, no-one can really prepare you for a dog, same as a baby... and the initial months with either a puppy, or an adult rescue can be very testing and tiring, and even someone who absolutely loves dogs (ie me!) can find it hard when the dog is demanding/destructive/insecure...

I would get some time out by implementing what the other posters have advised, and get some space between you. She is going to cling on to you - you are the best thing she's come into contact with :) How is she at being left alone?

CHloe :)

What you have is a normal rescue from my experience. They do tend to be more clingy & once they bond they do seem to be a lot closer to their owner. I have 2 rescues at the moment, one a GSD and it took him ages to accept that he was perfectly safe in another room, still doesn't like to have the door shut though. The other one a GSP still follows me everywhere after 2 years, and both when out for walks never wander off very far, they don't like to be out of sight.
You aren't doing anything wrong and yes it can be annoying, when she pesters you just ignore her, she will soon learn to settle.

Ingrid

Ingrid,

When we walk Sasha, she never leaves our side if she's off the leash. That's a very good quality. It makes me glad then, that she clings so closely. I'm starting to think rescue dogs really are special. I'll try to appreciate her more.

Oh that is lovely. I think our spoilt homebred darlings, like our kids can tend to take us for granted, LOL :D

Yep sounds about right, polite to everyone but absolute devotion to their person, that is pretty much and adult shepherds perspective. :D

Samantha, thanks, you know I do feel sort of like a witch at times, that I'm complaining about such devotion and not appreciating how quickly Sasha got attached to me. I think I need to stop whining. You're right, I should learn to cherish her love, and not reject her.

Lindsay, that's great advice about saying "that's enough" as a cue that playtime is over. I've been lurking here for a few days and have noticed that Gwen Bailey's "The Perfect Puppy" gets recommended quite a lot. I'll have to find a copy. And one of those Kong toys as well!!

Jeangenie, I think you're absolutely right, she is trying to find her place still.

Brainless, my dad always had shepherds, Belgian and German, and they were always independent and not at all clingy. But come to think of it, they were always completely devoted to Dad, and treated the rest of us very politely, but coolly.

Chloe, I do suspect the implications of the responsibility I've taken on has probably contributed to my feelings. The daily walks, the knowledge that no matter where I go alone, there is always someone anxiously awaiting my arrival back home, etc. You asked how she is when left alone - I blush to tell you that she's been a perfect angel each and every time she's been left alone, even for several hours at a stretch. She doesn't bark or scratch at the door, and the most destructive thing she's done is go upstairs and bring some of our shoes down. She doesn't chew them up, just collects them.

Sasha got spayed today, and as soon as I dropped her off at the vet's, I began missing her. She's home now, groggy, but still staggering around, following me wherever I go.

Thank you all so much for replying.

Hi Judy

She sounds great - give yourself, and her, some time...keep us all informed :)

You never know what you've got till its gone... its just a life-adjustment having a devoted dog

Good luck
Chloe

Hi Judy,
They're so like children - they get under your feet, but you miss them when they're not there!

It will get easier when you all feel more confident with each other, and have learned each other's little foibles.
:)

Gwen also does another book you may find useful called The Rescue Dog - full of good advice specifically aimed at rescues......

She sounds absolutely wonderful, I am sure you are just going through a bit of a change in your life and routine because she is a new addition and in a way it isn't unlike the "puppy blues" ..... you sound so sensible and caring i am sure it will all settle in to a routine you will feel comfortable with :)

Best wishes
Lindsay

Lindsay, I've read countless posts on this board from people who are having trouble adjusting to a new puppy. I agree, I believe I've come down with a bad case of the "puppy blues" although Sasha's not exactly a pup. I'm going to try to be more patient and not expect everything to conform to my idea of what having a new dog should be like.

Digger, that sounds perfect. I will look for "The Rescue Dog" book as well, thanks!

Hi I am new to this, so please bear with me:) I need help! My husband and I adopted a 6month old puppy about two weeks ago. She is beautiful, 43 pounds, German Shep/Husky mix. Her name is Sheba. Sheba has a few lil problems. She jumps fences, digs and we are trying to control that, but the main thing is she jumps all the time when we are with her and if she is not jumping she is gnawing on our arms, legs, noses, etc. She also turns her water over every day and I go home in the middle of the day just to give her more, cause I know she has turned it over. What should we do? We have enrolled her in obedience classes and I can hardly wait until the instructor holds the treat at her nose, she may not have a nose left. Sheba is not mean, she is either teething or thinks we are her toys. We have tried the ignoring and when she stops we praise her, but as soon as we talk to her and try to rub her head, she is back to her mouth on our parts. HELP!

Thank you

Sharon