hi,

i don't know what to do, i have a weirmerana cross dalmation (zak). I have had him since he was 6 weeks old and he means the world to me. He is not a well behaved dog. He empties the bin everytime my back is turned, he will not heal, he sits on the furniture and jumps up people when they come to visit. I have tried to train him since he was a pup and even took him to classes run by an ex army dog trainer. I was told it is just the was he is, he is untrainable. He is not a stupid dog, he understands but just doesn't listen. Although he is naughty he is soft as a brush and loves people. That is until i had my daughter. She started crawling a week ago and he has snapped at her twice, if he had caught her he would have definitely hurt her. I have tried prasing him when she is around and he behaves to reinforce good behaviour and got her to give him treats so he will associate her with good stuff. None of this has worked. I have been told i have to rehome him, but who would want a 9 year old dog who misbehaves so much. I cant express how much this dog means to me and i know that if he was in a kennels he would be so miserable, he refuses to eat if i go on holiday and he is at my parents and he knows them and their house well. I tried to leave him in the garden, but after 4 hours of crying and scratching i had to let him in, Keeping him and the baby seperate is not a practicle option. Please please someone tell me what i should do.

Jennie

oooh Jennie - sorry ! what a terrible decision for you -but I think you have to put your daughter first ,I'm sure with training he might come around but its the time inbetween thats the worry :(
I'm sure someone with more knowledge of weims will come along and hopefully help you
Liz

Poor Jennie, what a horrible situation for you. Zak, being the cross he is, must be a real handful! It would be nice to be able to see him and your situation, but judging purely by what you've said, it sounds as though he is very jealous of your daughter. He has been your "number one" for 9 years and now his place is usurped. Understandable, but not acceptable.

You say the trainer said he is "untrainable". Neither any of the many dalmatians I've known, or the few weimaraners, have been amenable to "army-type" training. It's also possible that he is deaf, which makes training much more difficult.

I think you are going to have to get professional help on this because it is potentially so serious. Are you in the UK or overseas? We should be able to find some contacts for you.

he is definitely not deaf, infact he can hear a pin drop!! i am in the midlands not too far from birmingham

Whereabouts, Jennie? I'm in South Warwickshire, and it's possible I could get over and see you.

i'm in wolverhampton

That's quite a way from me...there's trainers at Rugeley who you could contact: try http://www.scallywags.f9.co.uk/. I'm not recommending them because I've never seen what they do, but they are in your area and may know of someone else. Or ask your vet for a recommendation. This is a serious problem and we don't want to mess it up!

Good luck!

thanks

You could also try http://www.k9phoenix.freeserve.co.uk/training.htm

HI Jeangenie,

Did you know that is Joyce Stranger's site? Did you ever read any of her books?

Apart from her animal fiction stories, she has written several about training dogs. (And she has helped me with my sendaway technique ) A really lovely and knowledgeable lady :)

Lindsay

Hi Lindsay,
No, I didn't know it was her site! I read all her animal fiction when I was younger, and thought they were great - she really seemed to empathise. I'm not surprised she is a good trainer, then! :)

Hi Jennie

I can't offer much advise but can totally understand where you are coming from.

I had to rehome my 9 year old dog last week because a) he kept fighting with my other adult male and they ended up seperated in closed rooms and b) he snapped at my son (now 3) several times and really didn't like him.

It started when Christopher began to crawl with backing away, then when he toddled, snapping. I never left them together and got through 3 years, but now we are at the bringing friend home stage I could no longer take the risk. It was bad enough risking my own child.

I was lucky in that he was taken back by his breeder, who reckons there is a good chance of a good home for him, she may even keep him herself. I know that doesn't help you, but I sympathise. It was a dreadful thing to take him back after so long, I felt like I was stabbing him in the back.

Please don't put your baby at risk, a dog that big will cause serious damage and you would never forgive yourself. At the end of the day you can replace the dog, and HE WILL GET OVER IT. You can't replace your child.

Welcome to the forum Jennie. When your dog snapped at your child, what exactly did he do and what was she doing at the time? How did you react?

The first time he snapped she was crawling past him, he was just lying on the floor. He was definitely awake. She wasn't heading towards him. When he snapped i reacted by smaking him, i never smack him, but i thought maybe it would be such a shock that he would know that it was really wrong. I then left him for the afternoon. After that i made sure he had lots of attention over the coming days, i even brought him a big mac burger!!! when he came near my daughter for fuss i praised him for being good. The second time she crawled straight for him, i ran after her but he snapped before i got there, I just told him off. I didnt see the point in smaking him if it didnt work the first time and i am not really happy about hitting him in the first place.

hi jennie

sorry to hear you having problems - you don't need to tell me you have two independent willful breeds combined into one!

what happened immediately before he snapped at your baby... did she go up to him? how did you introduce them at the beginning when she was born? can you give a bit more info?

i don't know enough about weims, but dalmatians normally love children...although the older they get the less tolerant they can be. it sounds to me like you need to put some distance between you and him, and go back to basics....but its a risk :( more people to help will be along soon i am sure

best of luck
chloe

when i brought her home, i let him have a sniff and see her, he barked when she cryed but that soon stopped, she didnt seem to bother him at all while she was unable to get about, i have made sure he still gets lots of fuss, but as a single mum its even harder to spread myself between the two!

I expect you have thought of this, but would it be possible to leave your dog with your parents whilst your child is at the crawling stage? I realise this is difficult and you need to be so careful, but many dogs are accepting of babies but occasionally become worried when the baby starts to crawl. If they have normally been OK with children generallly, and especially when the baby was tiny, they are often OK after the crawling stage.

Obviously you have to put the baby first, but perhaps the situation could be managed for a while, and then maybe a sympathetic trainer could help with ensuring the dog is happy with the baby later on. It's difficult as i know you said the dog pines for you, but IMHO it is likely he would settle eventually. If your parents are close, perhaps they could babysit for an hour each day whilst you take out the dog?

Sorry if these are silly suggestions, I do sympathise, you are in a very difficult situation.

Best wishes
Lindsay
X

Hi

I was in a similar situation with my 9 year old Dobermann who started to snarl at my little girl when she began to crawl after paying her no attention while she was a baby. My dog was on her last chance to stay with us when we tried letting the baby feed her, we would put the baby in her high chair and let her throw food on the floor for the dog (became babys favourite game) after a short time (my dobie learned quickly were food was concerned) she came to see the baby as the best source of food possible and though she would never take food from the baby she knew that all she had to do was wait and at some point the baby would leak food from somewhere and it would fall on the floor. Very gradually we led up to the baby feeding her from her hand and we were lucky enough to have 3 1/2 more years of a contented family life with dog and child being the best of friends.

I hope you find a solution.

Nikki

she does feed him bits when she is eating (even if i dont want her to!) Zak knows this. I just wish i could make him understand that what he is doing could result in sadness for him!
I know that if anything happened to my daughter i would never forgive myself, do i wait till he bites her and scars her for life. How would i live with that, do i go with the training. Or do i try and rehome him. I dont trust people when it comes to animals and i would be so fearful of him being unhappy (that is if i could find someone to take him, which i think is unlikey). It just seems he is happy with her when it suits him.

I feel i am in a no win situation. It is causing a lot of heartache. For the past 9 years he has been my best friend and has been the only thing that was always there with me. Obviously my baby comes first, but i really wish that i had waited till he had lived his days before having her.

I would advice anyone who loves their dog as much as i do to seriously consider the consequences of having a child when a dog has been number one in your life for so long.

You could crate him when the baby is about so that he has a safe retreat, and she is safe from him. At this age they sleep a lot so you could have him out when she is having naps.

Once she is walking well he may be less worried about her. I would tend to think he is more worried about this strange dog/human crawling about than jealous. Some dogs don't like young puppies, but are fine once a pup is a bit older.

I would not take the chance with my child. The damage that can be done from one snap that occurs in an instant can affect your childs life forever. My child was bit by a dog. She has a scar on her face from her eye to her mouth. She was bit at 18 months of age. She was crawling by the dog at the time. The dog had a bone and instinctively snapped at her not to try and get it. He didn't even realize the damage he had done, he gave no warning. She had over 100 stiches to her face. It was a nightmare. Don't chance it.

Carissa

Hi Jennie
Sorry if i've missed it some where,but how old is your baby? Has she been in a baby walker?
Now the only reason I ask this is because, When I got my dobe last year(he is 2) my little boy was about in his baby walker. Now every time declan went near bob ( no matter how ahrd i tried to stop him ) it mean't he would bang the dog's toes. So bob associated declan with his feet being knocked. After a few days of this happening declan got no where near bob,as soon as bob saw him coming he got out of the way or i stopped him.
So now declan is walking we've had to in a way reintroduce them both so bob know's his toes can't get hurt anymore.
However bob now associates Declan with food, and is now his best friend, follows him everywhere.

Alison:)

she is 9 months, i dont have a walker for her but she crawls. I wish they could get on as well as yours do!

My Lab x Collie (now over the Bridge) did this with both my boys as soon as they hit the crawling stage - she was terrified because this 'thing' which had just laid there was now moving towards her! I watched her like a hawk for about 6 months afterwards - and like you praised her when she was 'good' around them - never punished her for moving away, loooked for the signs that she was stressed by the childs presence (lip licking, pulled back eyes)and encouraged her to make the desision to move away. NEVER EVER take risks with your child - this may mean the dog comes with you where ever you go rather than the child sometimes. Harriet lived for 4 more years happily with two boisterous little boys and became their loyal protector...........

Would it be possible for you to build a kennel and run for the dog to go in during the babies active times? Then you could keep him with you but your child would be safe. I understand your concerns about being able to rehome a difficult dog, and the anxiety that would cause you. Good luck
Ted

From one mother to another NO dog is worth risking the safety of your children for.
One member has already told of the scar her daughter has from a dog and the upset it causes.
Maybe with training............. do you really want to take that chance as if he has snapped once no matter how much training the potential is still there.
What if you keep him and the worst happens? Scarring for life of an innocent child cannot be put right with if onlys.
I know it will be upsetting if you have to part with your friend but not as upsetting as for the next 40+ years looking at your childs possible scars and knowing you could have avoided them :-(

Iam with you on this one Staffie apart from the fact that this dog may scar the baby worse still she could be killed.
all it takes is one mistake on your part and as a lone parent you cannot be in two places at the one time all the time.
I am sorry for you but your child needs the freedom of her own home ,and she needs to feel safe secure in her home .
So unless you can rehome the dog I think you have a decision to make
Mari

jennie, I'm so sorry for you as I have a dog who is not childfriendly (fortunately, I have no children) so I know what a constant worry it can be. Could I suggest that you buy a muzzle for him and make sure he is wearing it whenever your baby is in the same room. Also, when he is out on walks so he wears it for "good times" as well. That would give you a chance to consider your options more long term. I would support you in not re-homing unless it is to someone you know well and are in close contact with because no one else is going to have your patience in dealing with the problem and problem dogs frequently get into a cycle of being rehomed, to their increasing distress. In your situation, I would save up for the biggest crate I could fit into my home and just get zak used to living in it whenever your daughter is up and about. It is going to be for the rest of his life but at least, you will still have your best friend. If you choose to part with him, please be absolutely sure you are not going to hold it against your daughter when times get tough that she caused the loss of a dog so dear to you.
Good luck
Caro

What about the training schools where they take the dog for a few weeks? This would give you some time away from the dog and hopefully you could explain the problem to them and they could design a training programme specifically for him and you? There's a company advertised in 'Your Dog'.

Stinkypup.

What an awful situation to be in, it must be so difficult for you.

There's a lot of good advice on here, caging/crating, muzzling etc.

I would definitely consider getting specialist help though, unfortuanetly, although I'm from around your area (solihull) I've now moved to Wales and don't know of anybody. You could try your vets notice board though.

Also, there's a book, called 'the dog listener' by Jan Fennell, I don't agree with all of the things she says, but there is a lot of good stuff in there, and from what you've said about the way your dog behaves, it seems he's trying to be the dominant one in your house...this book explains how to deal with dominance in dogs.

But, I would definitely try to find specialist help.

Sorry I can't be of more help.

Hope everything works out for you

Lisa :D