If you've lost a much loved companion, how did you deal with the grief and massive hole that was left?
I am trying really hard to keep it together but I keep crying, I just miss him so much.  I can't bear the thought of not being able to hold him or touch him again.  We went away for a weekend, which was planned before we lost him, and I tried all weekend to keep my emotions in check as I didn't want to spoil it.  But the moment we came home it all came flooding back and I can't stop.
I read somewhere that grief is just love with nowhere to go.  This feels true, I loved my boy so much and that love is consuming me.  Everyone has been very understanding and I know it's still early days but I feel that I should be moving on and feel that's what is expected of me, but I can't. 
Sorry for the rambling but I just needed to get this out.

No such thing as moving on .each of us deal with grief in our own way and of u need to cry that's fine. Grief is grief regardless of what the loss 
As much as it doesn't feel like it now time does dull the pain and we go through different stages but that loss will always be with us just in a less acute way   don't beat yourself up with expectation of time or your behaviour .

I feel for you!  I lost three dogs within five months and I cried for all of them, but the last one to go was my "heart" dog. I was completely devastated and couldnt stop crying.  I would just break down when anyone said they were sorry to hear about it.  We had them all cremated and they came home in an oak casket within a lovely cardboard box with a rose on top.  When the last one came home I couldnt even take the casket out of the cardboard box .  In the end my OH said he would do it when I had gone to bed.  Its been four years now and I still cry for them sometimes.  I say goodnight to them every night too.  Cry as much as you want. It will never go away completely but eventually you will remeber things they did that made you laugh!  I love the phrase "grief is love with nowhere to go". Dont feel you have to hold it all in. Xxx

I am very sorry for your loss.  I lost my BC boy in March.  He was my heart dog and I can't explain my devastation.  A longstanding CD member contacted me with condolences, and told me of her own grief over her losses.  To know that she still cries, years after losing a dog helped me to feel "normal" for crying a million tears.  It meant so much to know that I'm not alone in having such strong feelings for a dog.  Just to know that I wasn't expected to move on, and that sobbing on a daily basis was ok.

I'm not crying every day now, but do admit that, out of nowhere it hits me again that I'll never see my precious boy, and I just can't stop the tears.  Please believe that there are plenty of others, like you, who love a dog with all their heart.  You're normal, allow yourself to know that what you're feeling is normal too.

Thank you all. I'm so sorry for your losses.
I know we all love our companions very much and it hits us so hard when they have to go.
It was only 2 weeks ago yesterday so it's all still very raw, and I'm still meeting people on our regular walks who don't know, so i have to say it out loud again. 
I know that i will never experience a love like this again, we had such a special bond.  Many non-dog people wouldn't understand the strength of the feelings that we have for our friends.  He was such a tactile dog and I miss the cuddles that we shared.
I'm currently backing up all my photos of him and we have some lovely memories, so I will keep those in mind.

I'm so sorry for the heartbreak you're going through. Every loss is different, but they all hurt just as much because every dog is an individual. There's no rule as to how long each stage of grief takes to pass, but you won't be able to 'move on' until you, personally, are ready to. Be gentle to yourself, let out the grief. You might find the Blue Cross Bereavement Service can help you a bit. Take care. x

I lost my Summer four years ago and I cried for weeks. It just hurt so much all the time and I couldn’t stand the thought of never seeing her again and that she’d never do all the funny things that I loved her for ever again.

She was my first and only dog and I think I also struggled with just not having a dog in the house at all - it felt so empty without her.

I tried to remember the good things as much as I could even though it was painful. Eventually I could smile at the memories as well as cry, and the pain slowly dulled.

I don’t think you ever stop missing them and mourning them though, and it can take a long time to get to the smiling-without-crying stage. There isn’t a timetable though, it’s not a case of “wait 57 days and then you’ll be over it” or “you should be feeling better by now”. It takes however long it takes.

Hug your other dogs. Be kind to yourself. Cry or scream or do whatever you need to do, but also focus on those good memories. Some people find some kind of ritual helps, like a memorial service. Talk to friends and family who understand (or kind internet strangers!) Maybe make a donation to an appropriate charity in his name or plant a tree. Just give yourself some time.

I’m dreading the time when we say our final goodbye to Isla as I suspect she will be our last dog. She is 6 now so time is passing all to quickly. She should have as many years again, but you never know what’s round the corner.
I’ve had dogs most of my life and it will be dreadful not to have a furry friend nudging me for a stroke.

It’s never easy when your lovely friend dies, some seem to hit you more hard then others. I’m not totally sure I’ve got over my first goldens death.

There is no time limit in our grief for the loss of a dog, some of us may never get over loosing certain dogs, im welling up now thinking of my gorgeous boy which i lost nearly 3yrs ago, i can now smile when i see photos and videos of him but every now and then it hits me and hard. He is still in his urn in my front room as im still not ready to scatter any ashes of his.
One of my fathers dogs who was lost at a young age he too suddenly hits me too.

Give yourself time and do what you need to do to get through the day, even if its crying and hiding away, there is no right or wrong way in dealing with grief, we are all different.
Just be kind to yourself x

I often think that grief is like waves. When we first lose a person or beloved animal the waves are large, they engulf us and just keep coming. You don't have time to think or breathe before the next one hits you hard.
Eventually you get a break between waves and that break gets longer as time passes.
But a wave will always come back when you least expect it, smacking you hard and taking you back to the beginning.

You've just got to to ride the waves, fighting it makes it worse. Let those tears flow, and don't put a time limit or any expectations on your grief.
X

Everyone is different, but after loosing my fist dog at s young age I vowed I would never again have just one.

As you said that love needs somewhere to go, and also to distract you.

Luckily for my new puppy that arrived just a week later (had thought it would be a long wait, but there just happened to be a pup left).

Just as well pups don't know any better, as I did feel that I was betraying my dog of a different breed, but I was busy looking after her and the children, and of course puppies make you smile through the tears.

Now never being left dogless, when one goes, I can have a bit more time to grieve their loss but still have the others, so do not feel that I am replacing them when I eventually have another puppy.

So I would always advise people who plan to keep two dogs to have 5 - 7 years between them in age, so that you always have one left, and add another, so you go from Pup with mature adult, to mature adult with oldie, back to pup and mature adult and so on.  To help with this those wanting a pup with two dogs fairly quickly I suggest if it is suitable for them to consider an adult rescue, and add a pup once the dog is well settled,

Thank you for your post, it's a very good explanation of how we feel.
I'll be find for a while and then it feels as if I've been punched in the chest, the pain feels so real.
We do have another dog, and he is getting lots of attentions and it does help, still having to take him for walks.  However, he is 10, and I think he is more relaxed now being the only dog.  As much as I would like to bring a puppy in, I think it would be unfair on him.  Although I know when he goes, I am going to be hit hard again, but with no distractions this time.....

To be honest assuming it is a breed that lives into teens at 10 bringing in a pup would revitalise him.

Thank you all for your kind words and advice.
In case anyone has the need, I have just spoken with a lovely lady at the Blue Cross Pet Bereavement service (0800 966 606). 
It certainly helped me today.

I  feel for you.  It has been over a year since  I lost my best girl ever at 10 yrs,  a sheltie.  I miss her every day still. I have two other lovely dogs but she was the one.

I suppose it will get better in time but like you,  I still feel the pain and can hardly look at her photos.  Best wishes to you and you must know you are not alone in your feelingsx

Snowflake

Re comment from Brainless -
We had a Cocker /Lab who was about 13 ½ when we adopted another xbreed aged 2½ from someone we knew, We didn't know if she was into 'toyboys' or if he was into 'grab-a-granny' but she lived just over another 2 years with a new lease of life

Thank you Snowflake. Each day is getting better and my other dog is really helping. He has become much more affectionate in the last few weeks.
I will never forget my special boy, he will be in my heart forever.