Stop going out with friends.  We have a monthly meet up for several years now, but I have nothing in common anymore with them. We have grown apart and I really don't enjoy the nights out.  However, how do I get out of them? I make up excuses sometimes but feel obliged to go.  Would it be so wrong of me just to say I don't want to come out with you anymore?????

HELP !!

I wish I had some friends to go out with !!! Maybe I should go in your place.
The only thing I can say is that honesty is best. Good luck !

Aren't you even close with one of them ?. If you honestly wouldn't care if you didn't see any of these people ever again then just tell them you don't feel you fit in any longer and stop the contact.

Why not suggest doing something a little bit different, maybe a pub quiz or bowling.That way there is less time for conversation and having some fun may change your mind. You are possibly not alone feeling the way you do so it may be a welcome change for all.

Well you have done very, very well to keep up with doing this once a month for several years, how on earth have you all managed to do that for several years, that is dedication.

Old school/college friends and work colleagues are great to meet up with once a year or so or at weddings, births etc but every month is a lot to ask, I take my hat off to you, with the lives we all lead today with work, family and always new friends you have done really well.

I would simply say words to this effect, that I think they are all great people and the last few years have been wonderful but it is now time for you to move on as you don't feel you have a lot in common anymore,  you'll stay in touch but no longer wish to meet up every month. Say it in a nice way......... and don't let it sound like "I am so bored with you I have to run now" :-D

Do keep in touch though, you never know when you may need them again, you must have been a pretty tight bunch at one point to still all continue with this, so don't completely shut them out, send Birthday and Christmas cards and invite them to special occassions you can never have too many friends. :-D

If you're still not sure about how to handle it, why don't you just reduce the frequency and see them every other month, or even less.  You don't have to stop completely, immediately, and you could simply say you're trying to save money...

At least this way it'll take the pressure off whilst you have a think about exactly how much contact you want to maintain :)

Call it off, if there are a good few of you it shoud be fine. 
May be you are not alone in feeling like this, you could suggest making it 3 monthly and slowing down to ease it off instead.

Karen :)