I don't know if you can help me.

My husband walked out on me and our two children, 1 and 3 just before
christmas, as a result I am unable to walk my two labs during the
working week - mon - friday as I do not get home from work until 7:30pm
and leave at 7am and with two very young children it's just impossible.

I desperately don't want to loose the dogs as well, especially as this
would be too much for the children to go through.

I don't have much money due to my circumstances,does anyone have any suggestions - any dog walkers?

I live near Abingdon, Oxfordshire

Hi,

I lived near Abingdon - on the Barracks... are you close to there?

Chloe

I'm concerned about the children, what happens to them whilst you are at work? Jackie

Jackie,

Sorry, are you asking what happens to the Children or to the dogs?

Thanks

Paula

I am sure she has child care Jackie! :)

Yes both children are in Nurserys during the day.

I just can't face carrying two crying children on the evening walk and managing the dogs in the rain any more and it is hard enough getting them both dressed and in the car by 7am let alone walking the dogs. It's just too hard on them and they don't understand what is going on. It's difficult to explain to young children. I just feel so guilty for both the dogs and the children, Meg and Gem (the dogs) are just so loving and don't care what you do with them as long as they get some love and attention, they deserve a better quality of life.

The dogs stay at home during the day, which they are happy about but they do need to go out and have some human contact during the day.

Chloe,

I actually live in Steventon, which is one junction down the A34 from the Barracks, is that too far?

Thanks

Paula

Yeah, its too far ...I was going to suggest you tried a local person to take them up Abingdon Airfield.

I take it from the email address you work in Reading - poor you if so, thats a long commute in rush-hour :(

Yes I do work in Reading, which doesn't help much as the commute is terrible. I also have conference calls three nights a week so I'm just praying someone can help with the dogs.

Thanks anyway.

Hi,

I have been through similar to you.
If you want to email me on chloe@iscario.com please feel free :) I can advise you what I did in the same cicrumstances.

Chloe

I'm so sorry to read about the things your going through at the moment. I wish I could help you but I live in Bedford not near you at all, though I do have a friend in Oxfordshire she may be able to help? I so please email my andyjulie.miller@btopenworld.com and I will pass on your details if you want to. In the mean time just take each day at a time. Best wishes Julieann xxxx

I presume that you managed before-with your husband's help. The least he can do in the circumstances is to carry on with whatever help he was giving you before, so that you and the children can keep the dogs. Do you think that this is possible?. I really feel for you / I've been through this sort of thing/ poor you /stay strong.
Very best wishes
Jane

I think you hit the nail on the head when you said they deserve a better way of life,I think you all do,it seems to me the dogs are left a very long time who lets them out in the day when you are gone?
The first thing to do is the make sure that there isnt chance of a reconcilliation before you do anything drastic.
I went through a similar thing when my children were young one was a baby and we had 8 dogs I ha d to let some of them go it was very sad but I knew they were better off at the time I kept the older ones but it was a struggle financially anyway things did improve. Give yourself time.I do hope you get help.

I let my dogs go, when i was in similar circumstances. I put them through a proper breed rescue though and that helped a lot, knowing they were going to good homes - better than I could give them at the time.
Was a horrible time, but I know I did the right thing for the dogs.

sorry to hear of your dilema .I was just wondering if you have no young girls in your street as I had a knock on my door from a couple the other day asking if I had a dog for them to walk..for fun..why not put an add in the local paper ..i've seen all sorts..help with walking..anyone interested in a dog for a few hours etc...is there a lonely old age pensioner near you ...

I am a lone parent in a similar situation and its not easy but i promise things do have a way of working out, try not to make any descions in haste as you are probably emotionaly vunerable right now. Way up the info thats been given to you carefuly before you decide as things could be so different in months time.

As I can't even get my ex to visit his children, I feel I am unlikely to get him to help with the dogs. He will not tell me where he is living so I cannot get hold of him.

Although I'm sorry to read that so many others have been through a similar thing, it's a real comfort to me to know that this didn't just happen to me.

I'll keep trying and hope that something will work out and I can keep the remainder of my family together.

Thanks for all your encouragement.

Hi blacklabs, so sorry you are having such a hard time at the moment. Would it be possible to get a job that involves less hours and maybe claim Working Families Tax Credit? They are quite generous with child care payments and single parents get a good deal on it. It depends on your income but if you take a part time job that pays less than about £120 p w net then you will get about £100 a week WFTC plus child care payments. You will also qualify for free dental/eye treatment and free prescriptions etc. Just give them a ring and they will tell you what you would be entitled to, they are very helpful. You would have more time for your dogs and children - and yourself, even if you are not quite so well off. Good luck.

I have no practical advice to offer but I just wanted to say that I really feel for you. I'm sure that you'll work things out. Good luck

I'm not quite in the same situation because I still ive with my partner but as much as he loves my lab he's not a walker at all. I looked into professional dogwalking for while I'm a twork but it was too expensive so I put a note through everyones door in the local area.
I offered £50 a month for someone to spend an hour a day with her and to take her out.
Now the lady across the road has her practically all day becasue she loves her so much.

I actually had 5 people reply to the ad though. THey were mostly teenagers who loved dogs.

I'm sure there will be people keen for a bit of extra pocket money each month if you look hard.

Hi

I work and live in Oxfordshire and have put a notice up at work to see if anybody who lives in Abingdon would be willing to help you out on the walks.

I would offer but live near Chipping Norton so a bit too far out !

I am so sorry for the situation you find yourself in and have been there myself with two Labs and a yound daughter.

It does get better even though you may not feel like it now and there will be something a round the corner that will make things better.

If you need to talk then mail me.

Best Wishes

Lucy

Thanks very much for doing this. I could pay a bit, as someone else suggested I could manage £50 a month.

I don't know how to mail you as your mail id is hidden.

Many thanks

Paula how are you doing today? Any news? Julieann xxxxx

Hi sorry, I've been down with flu.

I'm ok, still trying to resolve the dog thing, how are you?

Hi Paula, really sorry to read your post. I wondered if you have any colleges nearby where there may be some students doing animal related courses. They may want to earn a bit of cash for walking or pet sitting. Our local college do nursery nurse courses and the students often help out women with twins or triplets as its good experience for them and of course it helps harassed mothers. Just wondered if a similar thing with dogs might be possible.
Hope things work out, I'm sure there's light at the end of the tunnel.
Lorna

Hi

Sorry to hear your predicament. I lived in North Abingdon - Peachcroft until last year when I moved up to Lancashire. Where I moved in with my now husband and got my first ever dog. It would have been a pleasure to walk your dogs for you if I'd have still been down there... as I'd never been able to have my own dog where I lived in Abingdon.

I still know a lot of people who might be able to help though... do you want to mail me at jenny@business-is-blooming.co.uk to tell me exactly where you are and I'll see if I know anyone who could help you out. That's if you still need the help of course - I've only just logged on and found the message.

Best wishes and good luck

Jen x :-)