This is my second (and last) ever litter, my first being around 12 years or so ago. I'd forgotten the stress and worry about finding new homes for the puppies. A lady came to view today and I liked her, and I feel confident she is capable and knows what she is taking on with a puppy and is in for the long haul. I so badly want excellent fabulous homes for my puppies and I am worried that all the buyers won't live up to my standards.

How do you cope if someone turns up and they 'don't feel right' - nothing concrete you can pinpoint but you suspect they aren't telling you the whole truth or oh I can't find the words, just an uncomfortableness about them that means you aren't happy. Do you tell that person you are not willing to sell a puppy to them? If so, how do you do that? Or do you accept that they have the time for the puppy (don't work), have a safe secure garden and have owned dogs before so they must be ok? That said, often you are taking that info at face value and can you check all they say is true?

There is someone coming on Saturday that I just don't feel right about. I haven't met them face to face and I'm willing to be wrong but what if they turn up with the deposit money but I'm not happy for no reason other than it doesn't feel right, what do I say? I would rather end up keeping the puppies than let them if I'm not happy.

You've already said it - the buyer doesn't live up to your standards!

You just have to say, I'm sorry, but I don't think that this puppy is for you - and no, I won't take a deposit.   You don't have to make excuses, straight to the point and keep repeating it - don't have to give explanations/apologies - you want the best for your puppies and if you have to be a broken record .."I'm sorry, but I don't think that this puppy is for you" then you do - and show them out!

But they may be wonderful people, and you may well be worrying unnecessarily!   And don't forget, Google can be your friend these days - google the address and you will be able to find out whether they do have a large garden or live in a tower block!

Edited to say - you could always phone and put them off on the phone if you are really getting bad vibes!

Go with your gut and say no.  I had a potential puppy owner, had spoken on the phone, and exchanged emails.  She sounded ideal, and had all the right answers.

I had not taken a deposit, and always tell people that when they come to see pups, that we can see if we are both happy with each other first.  Talks had seemed that their was no doubt that she would be having one of my pups.  She had taken 4 hours to get to me, so very much wanted to take a pup home.  After 3 hours with me, she had contradicted so many of her previous statements that I was getting the jitters. 

I didn't give a reason.  I just said that I was not happy for her to have one of my puppies.  It may be uncomfortable for you, but only until they have left the house.  And you won't be seeing them again.  I admit that I have had to do this more than once.  My answer to folk would be "well don't lie to me then!"

Have refused before, and would do so again (although no breeding plans at the moment.)

It's such a massive responsibility, I know how you are feeling. We were in your position at the end of last year and like you, my main priority was the best possible homes for our puppies but we did say no to a couple of families. I had a telephone conversation with a man and agreed he could come and see the puppies but there was something that didn't feel right so I called him back and chatted again and it turned out my feelings were right (long story) but I had to say no to him. We also had a family drive quite a long way to visit us and there was something again that made me feel it wasn't right, I just told them I didn't think they would make the best home for one of our puppies. I may have misjudged them, I don't know for sure, but what I do know is that the  families our puppies are with are the best possible homes where they are all happy and loved. Go with your gut feeling would be my advice.

Easy answer, don't take a deposit. I had someone who had been on my list for ages. They had been once to see my dogs before the amting and had booked a puppy. Just before the birth the e-mails were just a little strange but I gave the benefit of the doubt as I don't mind answering any questions thrown at me. However, when the second visit came I just knew that no way could one of my pups go to them. I telephoned the next day and told them that there would not be a puppy for them. They were so sorry that they hadn't paid a deposit so that I would have had to sell a puppy to them. However, I NEVER accept deposits so that I can be absolutely sure 100% right up to the day of collection that my pups are going to their correct homes and I have 8 weeks to make that decision.  I am so glad that I do it that way.

Does that mean if I do take a deposit I have to sell them a puppy? Not possible to return the deposit?

Yes, technically when you take a deposit then you have entered into a contract to sell them a puppy. If they won't accept their deposit back from you then they can follow it through. Much simpler to not take the deposit unless you are 100% happy that you have found a good home for the pup.

Ok, that's useful to know. So if you want to check people's addresses you need to ask for their full postal address before they view the puppies in case they want to pay a deposit and have one? The chap I'm not sure about who is coming on Saturday, I do not yet have his address.

eta, I've now asked for it!

If you are unhappy with the man during the visit, you could always suggest very firmly that he goes away and thinks about it. If he then comes back to you and says he still wants the pup, I would tell him that, having thought about it, you don't think the pup would be right for him and that you don't want a situation where both parties end up being unhappy. This way you don't get into any unpleasantries during his visit, you're not implying that he's not good enough for one of your pups and he feels you are putting him/his family's happiness joint first along with the puppy's. Sometimes it's just easier to say no over the phone rather than face to face. Of course, if you feel he is definitely wrong for the breed/any breed (lol) it's up to you whether you try to explain why so he doesn't just go off and buy another pup instead.

BenjiW

Taking a deposit is entering into a contract.  Unfortunately puppies come under the sale of goods act (yes I know!)

If someone visits that hasn't given me an address, it's not such a big deal if they're not suitable.  If people seem fine, even though I won't ask for a deposit, I just pass a notebook to them.  I say please can I have all your details ready for insuring the pup.  It's an easy way to get at  least address, postcode and phone number.

I have a prospective puppy form . When the serious purchaser enquires I take name , address , phone no .Whether they have children or grandchildren .Do they have other dogs / cats ? Is their garden is fenced .Have they had dogs before and what breed ? If they have I ask for the name of their vet and would their vet give a reference.There are ways to check addresses . Ways to look at where they live (google maps)
I ring their vets and state quite openly they are coming to look at my puppies and I want references. I have never had a problem with vets /receptionist/veterinary nurse obliging.I also have done homechecks.

Thanks everyone. I think I may well do as Marisa suggests on Saturday if I'm unhappy with the people. They gave their address ok when asked and I can see via google that though it is not a great area, the house has a fenced garden, if not large. I can't discount people because of the area they live in though, lovely people live in not great areas. His response to me wanting his address though was that he is definitely buying a puppy and will be bringing the deposit on Saturday, again that slightly concerns me. The lovely lady yesterday wanted to reassure herself that the litter is the right one for her and had many questions, which reassures me.

I do volunteer work with breed specific rescue and we always homecheck prospective adopters and fosterers. Always. We also have forms/applications to fill out. I am in the process of buying my first show pup from the same breed and as the breeder is in a different country the homecheck possibility is out for her (not sure if breeders tend to do it though, i think they don't from what I hear which is strange?) but I wouldn't have minded that in the least. I do not envy breeders the job of picking people for a litter. It's very hard indeed.

Something my breeder said to me made sense too - that having the facebook accounts of your prospective buyers is a great help because you can see how they are in 'normal life' ie not just when sending you an email - you can see photos of their dogs and them, often from years past, and how they talk about them and what activities they get up to. It's a lot more helpful than just an email from a stranger attaching a photo they say is of their home.

I have asked her bunches of questions and we keep in regular email contact but I'm now trying to leave the poor woman alone a bit haha :D

Yes, I've had a few which are adamant that they ARE buying the puppy. My response was that no, they are coming to view, I have to be happy with them as owners and they have to be happy with me as a breeder. Nothing is decided with one visit, and definitely don't take a deposit.

BenjiJW, tell him you are not taking deposits from anyone as so much can change (including the buyer's own circumstances) between now and the puppies being ready to go to their new homes. If you feel he is being over bearing it might be a good idea not to even allow the visit to go ahead as how do you know he will listen to your advice on other things if he is being so determined over this? Just a feeling I get, and I could be wrong. Perhaps he has been let down over other litters and is determined to stake his claim, as it were (sorry, poor choice of words but in the middle of a terrible cold at the moment so brain full of cotton wool).

BenjiJW, tell him you are not taking deposits from anyone as so much can change (including the buyer's own circumstances) between now and the puppies being ready to go to their new homes. If you feel he is being over bearing it might be a good idea not to even allow the visit to go ahead as how do you know he will listen to your advice on other things if he is being so determined over this? Just a feeling I get, and I could be wrong. Perhaps he has been let down over other litters and is determined to stake his claim, as it were (sorry, poor choice of words but in the middle of a terrible cold at the moment so brain full of cotton wool).

> His response to me wanting his address though was that he is definitely buying a puppy and will be bringing the deposit on Saturday,

BEWARE!  I had a lady who, on the phone, said that she wanted to come and collect a pup right away!  I made it perfectly clear that the visit was to meet us all.

She arrived with a man who stayed in the car outside (not on the drive - in the road.)  Ready to make a getaway?  Or do I just not trust folk?

After less than 10 minutes, she stood up with the two smallest girls, and told me she was taking these, had the money with her, and was taking them NOW.  She didn't know what I fed - nothing.

I live alone, but had asked my dog sitter to come round.  I ran to fetch him, and he snatched the pups off her while I opened the door for her.

Be very careful.

Don't think I've already replied, did type a response then thought nah! Anyways doing another one ... or maybe it's the first!! I vet most buyers before a mating takes place. I don't advertise, so enquiries come via other people, many I know. That helps! What might not seem right on the phone might turn out to be perfect face to face, you'd be surprised how many adults are not that great on the telephone ... and there's a whole new generation just joining them (I'm a teacher :-( ), On the other hand they might not turn out to be right. See what they're like on the day.

If you're not sure after meeting them ... there are many options without hurting feelings. You could say right out you don't they're suitable for one of your pups, or you might not think the breed is right for them (it might not be ... mine isn't always the best breed for many people) and they'd be better looking at something else. If you've already got pups you could say that you don't have the right pup for them - I place my pups to the home, it's not a case of someone turns up and says they'd 'like the pup with the spot on it's head' ... if I don't have the right pup for the right home then that's it.

I ask all prospective pup owners to put their name, addy, phone nos, e-mail & vet contact info into a book. Why? So that I have all their contact info. I also tell them I'll contact their vet for a reference - course, not everyone has a vet ... first time buyers!

I never take a deposit. I understand why some might, but I wont. I have been asked if I'll take a deposit, I tell them straight, the pup is mine right up to the point of purchase.

By all means use google to look at where people live. One person's idea of an undesirable address might not be anothers. I live on an estate. I used to live slap bang on the edge of it until the stupid planners passed planning to build on open fields. So now I live slap bang in the middle of an estate. OK, it's actually a very nice estate. There are other estates in my town I wouldn't like to live on ... but I know some people who do live on these and actually say they're brilliant! I also have a small garden (but well fenced :-) ), I am sure there would be some less educated/knowledgeable people within my own breed who would say I couldn't possible have 6 of my breed in such a small house and garden. Well I do. What's more they are exceptionally happy and healthy ... they get out lots. They're trained. If I go to my friend's place, with 6 acres of field adjoining her yard ... if I'm not in the field with them, they're sat by the gate. If I go in the field with them they use the entire 6 acres. Size isn't everything! It's what you do with your dogs that's important.

It may be he's been 'booted' off someone's list for a pup and thinks a deposit is going to guarantee a pup. One of my prospective owners was booted off a pup list ... he'd even been told when the pup was 2 weeks old which pup was his (sorry, that's wrong, but that's another subject). He was gutted when at 4 weeks he was told he could no longer have a pup. I've found out through contacts that the breeder's mum decided she wanted that pup :-(

Keep an open mind, he may be wonderful ... but if he's not, then you go with your gut instinct, even if you can't quite put your finger on why you're not happy. I hope it works out well!

Edited as I've just seen Jean's post. That's a worry, and not the first time I've read about such a happening. If someone turns up with a view to a pup after the pups are born, I always keep the pups away from them. They get the same grilling as people who came to us pre-pups ... this includes meeting my dogs and seeing how they respond to them. They entire family are asked to come along. If there are young grandchildren, then they have to come to visit too, even if after pups born. But see how they are with your dogs - I entirely trust my dogs, and I can tell if they are wary/don't like someone. There senses are much better than mine!

If you are on your own have someone else with you, a 2nd opinion is great. I am greatly spoiled in that my breeder is my mentor, and now friend, she's encouraged me to continue with her line ... she therefore gets in on the 'grilling' visits ... plus I've had a number of years vetting people for her pups - she's always asked what I thought before saying what she thought. That's been so valuable. I've effectively been able to vet people when it doesn't matter, ie, they weren't for my pups. Granted, not everyone benefits from that extent of mentoring. If you're concerned, then don't feel compelled to introduce them to the pups! I hope it works out ok ...

Go with your gut instinct. If you feel someone's not right, don't let them have one of your puppies. It's better to have a short time feeling uncomfortable about having to refuse someone than a lifetime worrying about your puppy's welfare.

I think they will be ok in the end, he seemed very knowledgeable about dogs and training, handled them well and their situation is good. I don't think he has the highest IQ (am I allowed to say that? Maybe that is why his manner seemed strange on email) but is obviously very caring and has owned dogs all his life. The only thing I didn't challenge but didn't like was when I asked if he had had a puppy before (very different prospect than having an older dog or even an older puppy) he said yes he'd had one from a 'month' - well I hope he didn't! My dd thought he just meant from young and was confused at the age as his dog died recently aged 17 and so it was a puppy a long while ago. He has an elderly cat which he has had since a kitten so obviously has pets for the duration.

I have just updated an advert on a site online and saw an advert for a 12 week old Golden Retriever who needs a new home as "sadly we can no longer offer her the home she deserves". Please tell me someone didn't buy this pup and then a month later things changed?!! I absolutely dread that happening to one of my pups. The poor wee thing.

sadly i think some ppl dont realise just how much hard pups are and just how playful, plus worries me when i read/see because the breeder might not know :( poor puppy

> I have just updated an advert on a site online and saw an advert for a 12 week old Golden Retriever who needs a new home as "sadly we can no longer offer her the home she deserves". Please tell me someone didn't buy this pup and then a month later things changed?!! I absolutely dread that happening to one of my pups. The poor wee thing.

Our GR came to us at 9 weeks old and we were his 5th home - breeder, purchaser, member of purchaser's family, rescue kennels and then us. He will have been with us 7 years this year and is an amazing dog :-) Hopefully that poor puppy will also find a great forever home.

Gah got another enquirer which places doubts in my mind. At the moment just spoken through emails. He's in the army and says he will be taking the dog into the office each day so the dog would need to be sociable (which of course Goldens are). Offices aren't great environments for young puppies and I have said so, and I wonder if this is true and whether it will in fact be left at home all day?! Knowing what I know of the army, I am not sure people can really take pets to work? Also though he has a mobile number for me, twice he has given me his but not phoned me - if he can't afford to phone a mobile number then he can't afford a dog. In his favour though he has a family so maybe the pup would be able to stay home until it is older when it may join him at the office. Also his use of grammar and his spelling is excellent throughout his long emails and so maybe he is higher up the chain in the army and does indeed have an office. But I have asked several questions even before I will allow a viewing including the permanance of him being stationed at his current base and the likelihood of him moving bases. Lots of questions need answering in my mind so far and I need to talk to him on the phone and I want him to phone me. I would rather keep my pups than be less than happy about where they go. This is SO stressful!

I am not someone who finds being assertive easy so if I am going to discount someone due to their circumstances ideally it needs to be by email or phone perferably rather than face to face. Pointless someone coming to view if I am going to turn them down. I know though that I may have to anyway if I decide they are ok over the phone but just aren't happy when they turn up. Dreading that though, so glad this is my last ever litter!

My father was in the army, and we have a military base nearby now, and yes, lots of officers take their dogs into the office with them. Army bases tend to have masses of land for dogs walks, so from that point of view dogs owned by forces personnel are much better off than civilian ones. Moving? No problem.

Have you given him your landline number? I personally wouldn't phone a breeder's mobile number, not because I couldn't afford it but because the lack of a landline number makes me think "scam". I'm sure you're genuine, but a landline is more traceable and so seems safer.

Maybe this guy doesn't want to bother you by calling all the time. What are you expecting him to call for? I'm a bit confused by that. I know some puppy owners or potential like to call breeders all the time when the litters on the ground, I like to leave them to it and call a couple of times so not to bother them as they'll be busy. I prefer everything face to face as a puppy buyer, it's also harder to lie when face to face.

It's not a wasted journey for him if he's interested, you'll learn much more about people by seeing them in the flesh. They maybe perfect then again they may not be.. If they have a preference in sex and you aren't sure then say that sex is fully booked and if anyone changes their mind you'll contact him.

> Knowing what I know of the army, I am not sure people can really take pets to work?

I used to be in the Army and I took my lab and Mali's to work as pups as did my husband, quite often people who work in offices take their dogs. There were about 4 in the corridor I worked in and hubby used to take them into the Military Police Station when he was on nights too.

When they were older and able to they use to sometimes come out on PT with us too.

Yes my friend was round this morning and she had been an army wife and they had a puppy. They were posted to Germany in the days before you could bring dogs back without quaranteen so left their dog with her parents for 3 years and then had the dog back after that but she said its so much easier now and apart from that was no problem. I'm less worried now.

My landline is on the blink, has been ever since I swapped to Sky and it keeps cutting out. It also is 'engaged' for about 20 minutes after the line is in use for some reason. Once my years contract is up I am going back to BT! I have given him my landline number too but explained that there is an intermittant fault and my mobile would be more reliable.

Just be honest and tell him you find it easier to chat on the phone (if he's a typical man he won't be comfortable on the phone but tough lol). My hubby was in the Navy and sometimes took one of our dogs to work (as did others) but this could be at the vagaries of whatever mood the boss was in that week. If he is high up enough he will have his own rules lol. 

Well, they came, couple, 3 kids & one set of Grandparents and they stayed an hour and a half! Very nice family. Dad has had dogs all his life and in fact would only be taking the dog to the office one day a week, the one day the lady works. The lady has never had dogs but fell in love with the one bitch we have left and the man liked one of the boys. After all that time they couldn't decided between two of them so they've gone away to look up the difference in nature of dogs and bitches and will be back later. I'd feel happier if they had the dog as the remaining bitch is feisty, has a lot to say for herself, barks a lot and yet can be nervous and as the lady hasn't had dogs before I think the laid back dog would be better.

It's hard isn't it fitting the character of the pup to the owners? And yet when we got our bitch she was the last one so we had no choice and she is the best dog I have ever had and wouldn't be without her. Maybe I'm just too anxious! Though these people said they really liked the questions I was asking about them by email and that reassured them so they didn't mind.

Think if you feel the bitch would be unsuitable you need to kindly but firmly steer them in the direction of the dog (even to the extent of saying you just wouldn't feel right selling the bitch to them as you really don't feel that her character is unsuitable for their household and you would really hate both the dog and the family to be a mismatch at the end of the day.)

Yep, I didn't go as far as saying no about the bitch but did stress several times how feisty and vocal she is and how she is a different character to the rest of the litter. I've always said to dd this bitch is the one I will be careful about where she goes and it's no coincidence she is the last bitch to be chosen. The family were going to get back to me today but haven't so I am wondering if they decided they wanted a bitch but might look for a calmer natured one from a different litter which is fine.

From what you say, any pup they get will be a very lucky dog. They sound ideal, responsible owners.

Well today has been a blinkin nuisance selling/buyers wise. The army family came en masse again this time to pay a deposit, they've decided on the boy which I am pleased about but they turned up 90 minutes after they said they would despite living 4 miles away. I said when they arrived lightheartedly I thought they'd changed their minds and they replied "oh, we're always late" - no apology or anything. We'd not bathed our 5 year old or fed her as we'd been expecting the buyers so by then she was starving and fractious. Earlier another person had phoned and made an appointment for the afternoon and didn't turn up and when I checked emails later he'd emailed cancelling saying he'd decided against it. So really mucked around today!

How rude of the Army family. If I'm expecting anyone and they're more than, say 30 mins late, I ring and ask if I've got the right day as it's very inconsiderate when I've got 9 dogs who want to be fed/run/looked after etc. Don't let them get away with it lol

Very rude! We were horribly late picking Henry up as I'd totally misjudged the driving time, but I was in a panic the whole way in case the breeder changed her mind due to our lateness and I apologised for about 20 minutes when we did finally arrive!!

Way of the world nowadays people just do not think.

Manners don't cost anything and it says something about the person to me when they can be horribly inconsiderate of others. Would they like it done to them?

I hope theyre better at timekeeping when it comes to feeding a new puppy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That thought occured to me, plus '5 minutes left in the car' etc.

Then say that to them, better than worrying for the rest of the pups life!! Tell them it's like having another baby, routine, cleanliness, timing, limiting social life but with lots of upsides too!

Yes I have, and I've a whole care sheet with feed times and care routine too. As the Dad has had dogs from birth to old age more than once I assume he knows these things, it's just his new partner is new to this but I'm hopeful she will take on board what she reads and as it is her that will collect I will explain as much as I can then too.

Very difficult vetting new puppy owners!

With both our litters, I placed the ad on Champdogs when my bitch was confirmed in whelp. By the time the litter had been born, every prospective buyer had visited our house, met the dogs and stayed for a long chat. Some people drove 2+ hours to get here, so distance isn't an issue if they want one of your puppies!

After meeting them and their families (& sometimes going for a walk with the dogs), I had a good idea who would and who wouldn't be getting a puppy. By the time the litter arrived, I had 10 names booked (noted if preference for sex), with 2 - 3 on standby. A few days' after whelping, I would call each on the list firstly to check they still wanted a pup, and confirming there was a pup for them. At this point, it was easiest way to let anyone I wasn't sure about gently down - simply that there wasn't a pup for them.

I didn't take a single deposit, preferring to ask for commitment from buyers, for them to trust that once I said they had a pup, that they would get one! This didn't fail me, and with both litters, the pups booked at birth were all taken at 8 weeks by those people. Perhaps I was lucky or maybe I just managed the buyers well?

One person was quite open in that she had her name down on another list & would make her decision when both litters were around 6 weeks old. I got quite brave by then by insisting she decided which she wanted as I could sell her pup 10x over. She chose ours, had her pup at 8 weeks and is a lovely home.

All buyers had weekly photographs and videos of all the pups, and by 4 weeks were visiting weekly depending on how far they had to travel. Locals visited more often, my house was constantly busy, but for sure those pups were very well socialised!!!

So my advice would be if in doubt don't let the pup go! Remember the puppy is your property until the money is handed over (unless a deposit has been paid which is why I'll never ask for one). also remember that some people don't come over very well, and that they can turn out to be the best owners ever. Even first time owners have to start somewhere - I was particularly forgiving with first time owners and have helped them as much as they need through the various stages of puppy ownership when asked.

Go with your gut feeling, you will rarely be wrong!

Good luck
Tanya
(who is feeling very jealous of all those with puppies  as I'm sooooo missing that herd of puppies right now!)

Yes it is difficult isn't it. I do have some 'niggles' and little worries but I do think part of that is I am so protective of the pups and actually ideally would like to keep them all as no one could look after them or love them any more than I could! So letting them go is a hard process for me.

Several prospective buyers have commented to me that they liked the fact that before they visited I vetted them by asking them questions and they liked the fact I care about where the puppies go, apparently they hadn't met that elsewhere they have looked?! But thinking back and talking with my dd who was very much equal part of the process of buying our bitch, we weren't asked anything either despite buying her from an assured kennel club breeder. We chose this breeder because of the excellent hip/eye scores of the parents and her pedigree and the knowledge of the breeder was very high but I guess it is possible that despite her not asking us questions that we gave enough away in conversation with her that made her happy with what she heard.

What I am finding now is I feel that each puppy is going to a family that I am feeling is ideal for them. Each pup has a distinct character and personality and maybe that is chance but maybe it is because each family have come to see the litter and has handled and played with the puppies and bonded with a particular puppy and it is a particular puppy they have chosen. How then do those who have a list before a litter is born allocate puppies to people, and how can you be sure the right family gets the right pup? With my litter, 9 are typical Golden Retriever types, laid back, playful, and one is playful but more reserved and slightly hesitant and not so self assured. I was so pleased today for that pup to be chosen by a family that I think is ideal for her.

I found it quite easy matching pups with people. Everyone visited several times, giving me a good idea what personality would suit them. I asked them to pick two puppies, choice one and two. Perhaps I was good at steering them, but myself and my husband wrote a puppy name next to each person before they had even chosen, and amazingly everyone chose that puppy!!

So whether I steered them or not, they all got their first choice of puppy and all were very happy with their choices.

I think I'm getting more assertive or something. A chap has been phoning me and emailing asking for photos of each puppy and then requests for more photos taken at each angle etc. I sent him the ones I had already on my computer but couldn't find the camera lead to load up more and said so. Then he said he definitely wants a puppy and would I choose him one as he hasn't got time to come and see them and it is quite a trip (2 hours). I said no. I'm not prepared to choose him a puppy, God forbid what if it turned out to have some defect not picked up in my vet check or his but showed later, as far as I am concerned it needs to be his choice. Anyway having said he wouldn't have time for a couple of weeks when I refused to choose him a puppy he said he will come this Saturday, so he does have time then. Also my email asked him what his experience and circumstances are and he hasn't replied to those questions so I have now emailed again asking for this information saying I am concerned that he said he wouldn't have time to visit and as puppies take up a lot of time I am concerned he may not have the time a pup needs and again asking for info about his circumstances and experience saying I wouldn't want to waste his time by him coming if I wouldn't then be happy to offer him a pup. I realise that people can tell complete lies and say they don't work when they work full time and at the end of the day you just have to accept what they say to an extent but I am going to do my damndest (sp?) to get these puppies the best forever homes I can.

Can I ask whether you have spoken to this person on the phone, or has correspondence only been by email? I found that a fairly lengthy "chat" on the phone gave me plenty of opportunity to throw in the probing questions, keeping the conversation light and non confrontational. The next step was to meet in person. I found this very important as one person in particular came across really badly on the phone, it wasn't until I met him and his wife that any reservations I had evaporated & I knew they were just perfect!!

To be honest, I would be inviting him to come and meet with me the breeder, with no expectation that he would be making the trip to "choose his puppy". He would only be seeing the pups after I had met with him. What if you meet him and don't like him? What if then he thrusts the "deposit" into your hands and you find yourself with few options other than to hand over one of your puppies?

It must be doubly hard to reject potential purchasers when pups are already on the ground. After all, all puppies are just too damn irresistable!!

I would just turn him down outright. Too many negatives imo. Not initially prepared to only travel 2 hours (a mating I am waiting to happen later on this year will be a 13 hour round trip to see the litter), asking YOU to pick a puppy out for him (crazy!), not answering your questions. It would be a No for me, I'm afraid.

Whilst I don't like the fact he asked you to choose a puppy for him because he didn't have time to visit - I think for an inexperienced new owner it's actually a good idea to ask the breeder to choose.  They know dogs better than you and they know the puppies better.  We asked our breeder to choose us a bitch and I feel she assessed our situation and our personalities and chose very well for us.

I just wanted to make this point in case an inexperienced person thought from reading this that it was wrong to ask the breeder to choose.  What is wrong is to ask the breeder to choose because you can't be bothered to visit!!!

Turns out he is a farmer and needs to arrange for someone to be at the farm for the morning for his visit this week which kind of explains why he found it difficult to leave. Farming being a 7 day a week job. I had spoken briefly on the phone twice but he is quite brusk (sp?) in manner so it was difficult to get any words in! I am pretty sure he is severely dyslexic because of the one email he wrote and the fact that having been quite firm in wanting answers by email he phoned me to explain his circumstances rather than reply to my email. He has had cocker spaniels all his life and his parents still do but he has decided to change breed now. Life on a farm does sound like a good life for a dog and I am more open minded about meeting him on Saturday now. I have also said that I am not promising him a puppy, that we are just meeting for him to see the litter and we can talk about it then and he seems ok with that. I have no idea why he didn't just answer the questions I was asking, except maybe the dyslexia was a hindrance and he forgot when he phoned. He sounds like a landowner who is used to being in charge so definitely dominated the conversations on the phone, but we got there!