This is a long one so sorry..

I have a 5 yr old neutered male, he came to me at 1 yr old and he was fear aggressive when he came to me.
I felt i was the best home for him as i have time, patience and no children to worry about.

When he came he wasn't too bad as he was just getting his feet under the table but slowly he became worse, if i asked him to sit, or move or for a paw he would growl and snarl at me, the same if i was to walk past his bed as i am here all the time and my partner is only here at weekends i was the one who had to deal with his behaviour and unpredictability.

I made the mistake of using cesar milan methods, of literally pinning him and just general bullying tactics. This as you can imagine just put us all in a permanent conflict it was awful, i even considered re homing him but at the last minute rang a couple to say i had changed my mind even thought they knew what he was like i didnt think i could pass him on to someone else as i felt even though he has never actually bit i couldn't take that responsibility.

I contacted a behaviourist, did research online and even read posts on here and finally came to the conclusion that i was making him worse and changed my training methods.

Roll on 4 years and i cant explain how much he has come on leaps and bounds i am so proud of him, but he is still fear aggressive and doesn't like it if he feels he is not in control of a situation. We manage the situation it hasn't gone away.

Here is the issue, a few weeks back i text my partner to warn him to be careful of him when he is here on the weekend as he has been really growly that week. Which by that to warn him not to put the dog into a situation where he would feel vulnerable.
My partner was here and he didnt growl all weekend. Slowly over time i have realised 9/10 its me he is funny with.
I walk him, feed him, and i am here for him all day every day we haven't used harsh methods for years now (we both did it) so why does he just do it to me?
The thing that i really cant understand is that this dog cant bear to be without me, he is spring loaded when i get up he follows me even into the bathroom, if i go out he is at the window looking for me etc.. If me and my partner were to call him he would come to me.

So why does he just growl at me?

He growls at silly things, if he leans on me for a cuddle and i stroke him sometimes he is ok others he goes tense and moves and growls. Or again if i ask him to do something.
When he growls i ask him to leave the room as he just cant bear to be away from me, i dont want to punish him but i want him to know its not acceptable.

Any ideas? my partner makes a joke of it not knowing how much the situation upsets me.

tillyandangel,

That is such a brave post ad you have done so well to work with your dog and to tell how you changed your training style and why.

I don't think you can ever truly eradicate fear- you do have to manage it. Of course, you can reduce it and various strategies mean that you ensure you don't trigger a full blown fear response.

Sounds like your boy is nervy/wary by nature- sounds also like in his first year of life he either had a few bad experiences or was badly socialized, either would give him a wary scary outlook on life- part of him is always looking for the pooh trap. In addition the Cesar M stuff will not have helped- you know that already. He probably shows a greater range of reactions with you because you are with him more. Does he actually try to get as physically close to your partner? I'm guessing that he wants the closeness but every now and then just loses his nerve a bit so is a bit conflicted. It could be that your partner is a bit more physically distant from him and so this overly close but ambivalent state does not get set up. If this chimes with you then I'd almost consider perhaps cooling off from him a bit, if you can- not in a punishing way, just to keep things a bit less intense.

I think dogs like this can be really tricky and it sounds as though you have done really well. It strikes me also that, if I have read you correctly, he has never actually gone for you but that he just growls- which is good in one way.

It could also be that when your partner is home your boy feels like his group is bigger, he has a man in the house, and so he feels safer- safety in numbers, plus because some of your attention will be focused on your man perhaps it makes things a bit less intense? Or does he treat you just the same whether your b/f is there or not.

I suppose you have to think of him as a bit damaged really and you are his lifeline, but sometimes you also scare him a bit- so he needs to control you from his point of view because he both needs you in order to feel safe but also sometimes gets worried about you too- what is good is that he moves away and growls- he doesn't move towards you and threaten.

Have you tried doing target/clicker training with him? Would you consider going back to a behaviourist to see if you can get help for ideas on how to build on your good work?

I thought I was the only person in the world with a dog like this!!!

I've had him since he was 6 months, he was rehomed because he had bitten the child in the house. From the description I wouldn't class it as a bite the child was eating food dropped a piece went to pick it up and the pup got there at the same time.

My boy follows me about but does not always want to be touched and is not fond of close contact. He will freeze and growl in certain situations but always at me. He is very friendly with any visitors to the house I live alone which was part of the reason he came to me as he would have no contact with children.

He loves to play, has been clicker trained and loves to work we do HTM and a bit of competitive obedience at breed show level.

Forgot to say he's now coming up 9 and has never bitten only barks and growls an shows his teeth. Used to have to muzzle him to groom him but don't have to do that all the time now mainly for clipping nails. He has been to a groomer a couple of times and she is quite happy to have him back although I was upfront from the start and told her what he was like.

I think he might be feeling you are anxious to do well by him... maybe not relaxed and calm around him. Dogs are very good and reacting of our moods, they can even feel the stress from us when we're not aware of it. Is your partner more laid-back than you maybe?

Had he been neutered before you got him? Some dogs don't do well without testosterone, if it was done before he was fully mature it could make things worse.

He may feel he can be aggressive towards you as it has no consequences,it has become a habit, you are still there doing everything for him.

Does your partner share in his care when he is there, feeding him etc to direct his attention away from you a bit.

After all this time you may need some professional help with this as it will be ingrained in him.

It is not clear to me that the dog has actually bitten or nipped, he has given off clear signals of anxiety-'don't push me'.

It could be that buried in his past someone was too heavy-handed in his very early training, and he associates being asked to do stuff with an occasional aversive consequence, this may have happened in the past when he did not comply and, yes, the Cesar stuff may have left a lasting negative association with being asked to do things.

I think that we also have to accept that not all dogs are as malleable and compliant as others, particularly if they were poorly socialised as pups. It could be this boy was barely handled as a pup and therefore always has the capacity to resent it if he is not in the mood. I've known a fair few farm bred terriers that intensely dislike handling. The fact that they are so reactive to movement does not help and getting leads and collars on and off can be tricky.

I do wonder if you have done clicker training with him? He's a control freak character and often clicker training is good for these dogs because you have minute control over what you are communicating and what you expect. This way he can read you better and feel safer with what you are asking him.

> Or does he treat you just the same whether your b/f is there or not.

He is the same whoever is there.>

Have you tried doing target/clicker training with him? Would you consider going back to a behaviourist to see if you can get help for ideas on how to build on your good work?

How would clicker training work with regards to the fear or do you mean just so he doesnt growl when i ask him to do things?

I dont think a behaviourist would truly e ale to see what was happening as he wouldnt do the things he is doing in front of them as he would be focused on them.

> Had he been neutered before you got him? Some dogs don't do well without testosterone, if it was done before he was fully mature it could make things worse.

He was entire when i got him, and we were advised to neuter but i wasnt sure if it was right for him so we chemically castrated him first which did calm him down so after a year of chemical castration so by this time he was about 2 and a half we decided it worked for him.

> He may feel he can be aggressive towards you as it has no consequences,it has become a habit, you are still there doing everything for him

The only consequence he has is that he is sent out of the room when he growls as he hates so much to be away from me. He even knows what his consequence will be now as sometimes he will get up and remove himself before i say it.
He will stay in another room (regardless of if he was sent or he removed himself) then he comes and peeps round the door i ignore him, he walks up almost crouching and wagging (he rarely wags anyway) so its all very placating, i ask him to sit then i stroke him and then all is forgiven.

> Does your partner share in his care when he is there, feeding him etc to direct his attention away from you a bit.

yes he does but to be honest only with my eagle eye over him not because i dont trust him to feed, walk,groom, medicate him but because i like everything doing just so...