I have just bred my first litter from my working gundog and I was just wondering how do I politely tell people that one of my beloved pups is not suitable for them..... I am finding it really difficult? I live in the far southwest so one of my thoughts is that if people are willing to travel down here on more than one occassion they must be fairly serious?
Does anyone else have issues like this? 

I dont have any problem telling people as the puppies welfare are my one and only priority .

If you have a problem being honest and telling them your true feeling just say you have more people on your list than available puppies .

Travelling some distance is a plus but if thier home circumstances are not to your liking or on a more personable level you dont gel  then the distance they have travelled  is not a factor.

I tell people that they can go on my list, but that I will do my best to match each puppy to the right owner. Just because they were first to contact me doesn't mean they get first pick. That way it is far easier to tell them that I don't have anything for them in the litter.

I'm in the frozen north and a couple of people have travelled from the sunny south to meet me and my dogs for my litter (first admittedly), so forget the distance people are travelling. I know it can be difficult saying no to people, specially if they are genuinely nice people, but you have to consider how you would feel if you did send off one of your lovely pups with them, despite believing it wasn't the right thing to do ... how would you feel 6 months down the line when your original thoughts were confirmed and they were having difficulties, for whatever reason, or the pup was returned to your or even worse it was homed elsewhere without your knowledge.

You are either honest with them, can be done very nicely, and tell them you don't think your pups are suitable, even suggesting another breed (or non working line) to look at if it's a case you don't think the breed, or the working line, is right for them. Or you cop out and just say you haven't got enough pups to fill an existing order - that way though if they're really keen still they may ask to go on a waiting list, still not solving the problem.

I think you've got to go with your gut instinct and politely say no. :-)

i dont know your breed but if its slightly unusual, then people may have to travel to get one, so maybe thats why they are prepared to travel, rather than a reflection on their seriousness? Certainly thats the situation in my breed. You just have to explain to people before they visit that they vsit at their own risk and if you feel that they are not right for one of your pups then thats their risk....visiting isnt an automatic right to having a pup. If you dont like telling them face to face when they are there, then maybe go along the lines of saying "you go home and think about it for 24 hours and we will do the same" and that way you can say "no" by email or phone which may be easier for you?

I have turned away at least 10 people for our litter, I just explain that for what ever reason I am not happy with situation maybe present dogs, young children or work hours, and just say welfare of the puppies and the familys they go to are the priority, 99% of the time poeple are fine about it every now and again they get a bit snotty but that confirms that they probably not the right home.

We have had quite a few wanting to put deposits down before they see which I refuse for many reasons but one is Im not being tied into selling until I meet the people. 

Agree with others, just say you have more enquiries than puppies and you will have to make the best decision for your puppy. I had one lot last litter who got very snotty when I turned them down, it must be disappointing but you have to be happy with your decision.

I do the telephone 'interview' first, then if that is satisfactory they get invited to see the pups so we can meet each other. I find that with a 'gut feeling' 'womans instinct' thing the phone call can tell if you like the people, then when they visit, if I wasnt happy I would be honest. they need to know if you have a problem, just what the problem is.

Because ours is a numerically small breed often meaning long distances I to do my interviewing firstly by telephone. 

After that they can visit me or visit a friend in the breed I trust to help vet and to get the all clear from the dogs. 

Also if they haven't actually been in contact with the breed any time recently, it is important that they get a feel for them, preferably without the distraction of any puppies.

When letting people down it is quite easy to word it so that they see you as doing them a favour avoiding them making a costly (emotionally and financially) mistake if the breed or their circumstances are not right.

I had someone that sounded ideal for a puppy.  We had exchanged several emails, and quite a few telephone calls.  I would have bet my bottom dollar that the home was going to be great for one of my precious pups.

It took them 4 hours to get here, and, after being here for over an hour and a half, I had to bite the bullet.  And tell them that I wasn't happy that one of my puppies would be safe in their care.  The "friend" who tagged along was furious, but the potential owner was more accepting of my decision.

If I had pretended there were not enough pups to go round, they may have wanted to wait for another litter.  The way I see it, I only had to say no the once.  I felt awful, when they had 4 hours to drive back home.  But my pups were more important than them.

Can I be nosy Jean and ask what the problem was? I have mostly gone on instinct with the 2 puppies I homed, and hopefully this time I will be keeping my singleton. But if not, I could do with the voice of experience to help me work out when the apparently ideal owner suddenly starts alarm bells ringing!

Okay so people who ring up enquiring usually at least pretend to have done some research. I have just had a call asking what colours my pups are.... my breed only have one colour.... very worrying! 

> Can I be nosy Jean and ask what the problem was?

Certainly.  In all the time they were here, and met every dog in the house, her kids did not once pet or stroke a dog.  Given that all my gang are used to people and are used to being fussed, and having temperament praised, I found it odd.  And most kids get on the floor and play with pups.

I casually asked her lad whether he liked dogs.  To be told that theirs always hid from him behind the settee.

Warning bells!!

Hmm, yes! Might have just been unsure, but why take the risk! Thanks.

I can testify what an awfully difficult thing it is vetting potential owners, I found it very difficult & I always thought I knew people! Like others have said, you must say no if you are not happy with something...

Would just reply to Jean though, we had a family with a boy of 12 who was actually scared of the adult dogs! His older sister was absolutley lovely as were the parents. On one visit, he actually hid behind the wall rather than come inside! Well, I could say I went against my better judgement in letting them have a puppy, as I felt his fear was unfounded as he had not had any nasty experiences, and it was possibly all attention seeking? I'm so glad we let them have a pup, we have met them several times and the boy will now run amongst several adult dogs, his own included and have a ball! He has obviously gotten over whatever silly time he was having!

On the other hand, a very outgoing boy and his family returned their pup after having done not a lot with him for 9 months, so perhaps experience counts for a lot with vetting. I know I probably got it wrong, but I didn't see that one coming!

Ive written before about a lovely couple who wanted a puppy, they seemed just perfect so I invited them to see them.

They brought their adult son....who lived with them!

He was just awful, kept making a fuss of the boxers saying " now these are proper dogs - not like those excuses for dogs"... the mum and dad were looking for a Cavalier.
The husband then brought out his list of questions...do the dog wardens bring the dog back if it gets out of their 'leaky' garden? *EEK*
Will the pup be able to get over the barracades I intend to make to keep it out of all our rooms......? * whoops*

Meanwhile the poor woman was curling up with embarassment.
I said no there and then and the son got nasty, fortunately my Hubby is 6ft 5 with quite a strong bearing so they shuffled off. I did think that I would have had further flack from them but didnt.

It's a minefield out there folks

> we had a family with a boy of 12 who was actually scared of the adult dogs!

I appreciate what you are saying here, but it was not the case with my visitors.  The kids weren't scared - they run absolute riot chasing each other and screaming around the house.  The mother did nothing to curb their showing off.  And the reason that the dogs at home hid behind the settee was obvious.

I made the right decision.

I have to agree Jean you did mke the right decision! Everyone is different & I think the worst combination of all is the families with out of control children.

I also would be very wary of families with only children in the future as the only problem areas have been with those with one child. I think sometimes the "child who has everything" can put such immense pressure on the parents that they will get them the puppy and bow to the pester power!!

Funnily enough I didn't worry about the two families from our litter with only children (one pup returned, the other having problems) and worried more about the two other families, one with a baby and the other with the frightened older child. As time has gone by, my initial worries have proved unfounded, and both families have done fantastically with their puppies. The one with the baby actually got a dog listener in at the very beginning to help guide them and they've just got the best dog ever!!! I couldn't be happier.

I think the issue with selling to families with children has to be discipline. If they can't control their kids, how are they ever going to manage an adolescent dog! Also noisy raucus kids will whip up an excitable puppy too much. A quiet pup would be intimidated and scared. Neither situation good!!

I have found it very satisfying to place pups with families, but an absolute minefield and I can understand why breeders (especially with my breed) won't place puppies with families with small children. Our first dog of my breed was purchased while my youngest child was 3. I had another baby when the dog was 18 months old & he was the best addition for our family we could have wished for... he will always be missed, and my kids although older when he died will never forget the special bond they had with their first dog, Spud!

I will consider selling to families with children, but have had my eyes opened and may approach selection a little differently in the future.

You have to go with your gut instinct at the end of the day...

> I was just wondering how do I politely tell people that one of my beloved pups is not suitable for them..... I am finding it really difficult?

I would be honest and perhaps give them the chance to recify somehing they may not be aware of.

" I feel at the current time I couldnot sell you one of these puppies as little Johnny moves around very fast and creates a bit of noise as all boys his age do. When pups start growing they can find this exciting and what they see as fun could cause injury. This would worry me and no doubt you too.  Perhaps have you thought about an older, calmer dog? or I would be happy to keep you on my list for a future litter when Johnny is a bit older and this may not be such a problem?"

I'm sure this could lead into a good discussion re dogs and kids and you are saying not now rather than not ever- even if not ever is how you feel.

I always think with difficult situations an explanation goes a long way.

This dog breeding is hard isn't it?

It is very difficult - I would keep them all if I could!! lol.
The people I was most concerned about haven't actually even called me back (came to see pups last Friday) so that says it all really. Even if they called me now the fact that they have left it so long means they aren't that keen. My breed (well all breeds I guess) can be quite destructive when young and I think the OH of the lady that was interested was put off by that - discussion regarding the Italian leather sofa was taking place in my garden!!   

Me too I have three wee boys upstairs and wish i could keep them all. There is one I can see so far who looks best for the ring and one who has stolen my heart. I agree that's a long time not to have called back if they were interested. Seems they have saved you a tough conversation. Good luck finding the right home

Trouble is mine had 10!!

Couldn't cope with that - 3 is a big litter here and planty enough to get on with