I know just what you mean about the hard work paying of my girl is seven today and ia affectionately known as the she devil but also so very nice with it.

Thank you Lindsay , they are very helpful , especially the bit about why my dog won't come back. Max does demand attention at home a lot (at least i think that is what he is doing) , he head butts my arm and then i stroke him , didn't really think of it before but i guess i am giving him the wrong message , none of the others do it. Sometimes if i call him over for a cuddle he just looks at me as if to say NAH i am busy right now! ok will stop giving into his demands , this doesn't mean i can't cuddle him though does it? I love our night time cuddles on the sofa x

> Sometimes if i call him over for a cuddle he just looks at me as if to say NAH i am busy right now! ok will stop giving into his demands , this doesn't mean i can't cuddle him though does it? I love our night time cuddles on the sofa

I would suggest that when you call him over - for whatever reason, you insist he comes and then reward him and release him if he's not in the mood for a cuddle - this should emphasise that he must always come when you ask him - if he won't do it in the house your chances outside with so many distactions are much reduced.  If he's demanding a cuddle get him to do something for it - even if it's only a sit or a paw  or high five or some such. Then really enjoy your cuddles.

What a brave woman you are.  to take all that on and when you have not had time to grieve yourself.  Not only are your dogs grieving they will also be picking up on your sadness, despair and probably depression at that.  And naturally they will be challenging the leadership because they will see you as weak leader, NOT because you have done anything wrong ITS just because you are trying to cope and need some time. 

Talk to your teenagers and see if they will help, talk to your friends and family and see if anyone could maybe take care of two of the dogs for a bit just to give you time to grieve for your husband. You need to grieve you are not superwoman.  

Do you feel everwhelmed by them because I know you love them all dearly but how about letting two go to new homes to take off the pressure.  If you cant then sit down and look at your daily routine and maybe timetable it a bit like you would do if you where running a kennels.  I hope with all my heart that you can sort this out but if you really really cant cope any more remember they feed of you energy and if it is negative they will take the mick.  Please think about yourself and your health in all this the younger dogs could adapt very easily to a new home. I know you said that re-home is not an option but your husband would understand and not feel disappointed at all, he after all would completely understand that you would have done your very very best to cope.  

All my sympathies to you and your family and best of luck with this.  But be positive things will get better.  

And as for the other people with the nasty comments they dont deserve to be on this website! 

this doesn't mean i can't cuddle him though does it? I love our night time cuddles on the sofa x

No, not at all - as long as the dog enjoys it, cuddles are a very important part of dog ownership!
Interacting is very important. I tend to look upon dog training in the home as simply asking for good manners :)
and I do enjoy dogs being affectionate on their initiative (makes dog owning a joy!) but only if they also listen to you at other times.
It's getting that balance - this will come. Have faith :) and keep training, always make the training fun and enjoyable for all of  you.

L
x

Hi mel4gsd, I couldn't agree more with the website reference for David Ryan's site--I bought his book on predatory chasing in desperation because one of my dogs is pathologically obsessed by my hens and has even worked out that he can flush them to get them to fly out over a 6 foot deer fence so he can retrieve them...his advice on recall is also in this book and it really is excellent, do have a look at the website.

would just like to send love and best wishes to you,really hope things improve for you.

> And as for the other people with the nasty comments they dont deserve to be on this website!

I agree and would drop a line to admin with their comments and username and let them investigate.

Hope you are having more good days than bad x

Mel,
Im so sorry for your terrible loss and reading this thread has brought tears to my eyes.   Im moved by your strength and the great strides you have made in your efforts with your young children and the dogs.
I feel shamed that there is one amongst us who was so insensitive towards you.   You know what they say about walking in another mans shoes....
You have my greatest admiration Mel for the efforts you are making - well done to you!   I hope that your 2010 is good.
Many hugs
Michelle

Hey mel4gsd, just posting to say still thinking of you and hoping things are brighter today, I suppose there is a long way for you to go yet but I am hoping today is a little easier.

((((hugs))))
Karen

Thanks for your wishes , had a couple of bad days , not the dogs , they have actually been very good , just bad days in general but i guess thats to be expected. Dogs are starting to respond to me a lot more now , training is going , still doing  them one at a time , Max the yob is doing well on his recall and not being so bossy which is great . Still having problems with visitors coming in but will post a new thread about that.