This is an oldie but goodie
Half bottle cheapo read wine,
2 bottles Newcastle Brown ale,
lemonade to taste/ and to dilute
Stud 1 orange with cloves and float in it.
3 cinnemon sticks and mixed spice to taste
about 1 oz brown sugar.
Heat the whole lot up in a big saucepan, remove the cinnemon sticks and orange, add apple slices and serve.
Gets better with time.