Hi Everyone

You may have noticed that there have been few Mockodile posts of late, well I think that is about to change ;) For a while, I thought we were getting somewhere but I have to admit that today has just been a day of sweat, blood and tears (literally)
Jake is now just over a year old and is turning into even more of a devil by the day. I can't even joke about it anymore as it's getting me down so much at the moment. "Apparently" I am a miserable cow most days and I have to say that I just feel tired, worn out and depressed about it all. He's a clever little blighter when it comes to doing things to suit his own needs (he can turn the lights on, get a drink of water from the tap including turning it on and off and more recently he is practising at jumping the stair gate, which I fear may be the last straw) but when it comes to learning what he's taught and trained to do (or not) he seems just to be think (or obtuse)
For the last two weeks he has just got worse and worse in terms of wanting attention and being a pain. We restarted training two weeks ago and he is doing well at that (as it is for food of course) but during the day, he barks at me for attention, bats me with his paw for attention, jumps up at me and just plain old runs into me !! On walks, he pulls (even with a halti), bites the lead and has now taken to when really excited after a spell of being off the lead, flying at me and nipping my ankles. Today, I was so miserable I took him out for a long training walk to try and sort us both out and it was going really well and then after I'd let him play off lead, he just ran down the bank and attached himself to my ankle. He didn't growl or go for me but it B**ody hurt and I've just had enough and I'm sure he's had enough of me.....

I just feel that after persuading people for 6 years to get another dog, I am a huge failure and that maybe he'd be better off with someone that can actually get him to listen to them. When he leans on me or looks at me with his huge eyes, or cuddles me of course he's lovely but I just feel really useless. The problem is that now I couldn't be without him but today I have burst into tears on pretty much everyone that has made the mistake of asking me how I am...

Having read this back, this even sounds really pathetic and I wouldn't be surprised if most of you post to tell me to pull myself together. Feel free but I'm not sure it's that easy...
Just don't know what to do....
Beth x

Oh Beth :(

Put him in kennels for the weekend - get some sleep and take the time to make a decision without the emotional blackmail of his big brown eyes.

No-one can tell you what to do - that's for you to decide but don't make a hasty decision and don't make it alone - get Tony (?) involved as well.

lots of love,

Fiona
x x x

Beth ,

I agree with Fiona, and just want to wish you well

Theresa :)

Beth,

So sorry and you don't sound pathetic at all.

May be worth thinking about Fiona's suggestion.

Pam

Beth,
How are you doing today, hope things look less doom and gloom
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Anne

You are just going through a rough Patch,maybe he senses your a bit down,this might sound daft but could you Board him for a few days give yourself some time apart and see how you really feel?
It may just give you a break and a new start.
Best Wishes

oops sorry im repeating the above post it wasnt there when I started LOL

I don't post much but I have been reading your posts over the past few months. The can bloomin get to you, can't they? Can't add anything else to what others have said but as you can see, there are a lot of people out there supporting you with whatever you do.

Helen

Oh Beth

Sorry, but you do need to pull yourself together.....with him!!!!!

Try & think of dog ownership as a DICTATORSHIP, not a democracy.

For a good life, a warm place to live, veterinary treatment, food, grooming, bedding, toys, water, etc etc...he will do what you want. It is not negotiable :-)

Straighten your back, sharpen the commands, soften the praise and whatever you do, don't laugh at him.

You are probably giving him mixed messages all the time, because you are a nice person & you love him, but he is firmly taking the mick out of you by the sound of it.

In order to get him back into line........divide out his food for the day and make him 'work' for every morsal of it. Every time he plays up, make him work, sits, downs, recalls, down stay, sit stay, watch me, whatever and when he is behaving then he gets some food.

Once you have spent about a month reinforcing that every thing is a command to be obeyed, then you can go back to normal feeding and you can give titbits, and start to random them. Then you can lessen them and finally take them away.

Unfortunately it sounds as if A...you are having a bout of the blues, B..you gave up on his training too early...C he is hitting adolescence! Non of it is insurmountable.

Watch a good dog trainer in action and it will always be about body language, and the belief that there is no reason for the dog not to do what is asked of him. It's time to stop thinking he's a puppy and get serious.

Hope this helps

PS...this is all meant kindly not harshly, I think I should have put more smilies in :-)

You are not a failure repeat as many times as required!

OK I am no dog expert but I am going to post from the point of view of having kids and my personal opinion.

When we moved to where we are living now I gave up a full-time job which I liked (well most days), it was a forced move (hubby was relocated). We only had our daughter at the time and part of me did resent working full-time and not spending enough time with her, but we needed the money. When we moved we didn't need my money and I didn't want to have to look for childcare in an area where I didn't know anyone to get recommendations. I was so looking forward to spending more time with my daughter.

At first it was great:D Then I began 'climbing the walls' I needed to do something else, I was so frustrated and was grumpy and generally just miserable. So I got a little pub job just to meet people and then went to college and then back to work part-time. Even the little pub job helped.

Now when the Mock went to kennels he came back a different dog, but may be you were refreshed to? You need a break and he sounds very dependent on you, may be he needs to learn to live without you for short periods and may be he would appreciate you more when you are there?

And no he would not be better off with someone else - who else knows his little quirks so well:)

Hopefully someone will come along and advise you on how to teach him to not be so dependent on you, but I just wanted to post my support:)

Oh Beth

I so feel for you. This is not unlike what we have been going through with Jasper. It is so soul destroying and you do feel a failure. The fact you aren't doesn't stop you feeling that way. I have sat and wept buckets while cuddling Jasper after having yelled so much at him. I just can't get through to him sometimes.

The Mock is being a difficult teenager. It can drive you to distraction. The idea of putting him in kennels for a day or two might not be a bad one. Give you time to get some rest and for a break to this pattern. I bet all you see around are well behaved dogs who adore their owners - come when they are called etc etc. NOT TRUE. There are lots and lots of little toe-rags out there - they're just hiding;)

Don't have any magic cure or words - but the thoguht we would tell you to pull yourself together - no way - you moan and grumble all you like girl.

{{{hugs}}}

Pam n the boys

Beth

Sarah and the others have given you excellent advice, but before that you and your partner have to get together and really talk and decide between you what you are going to do, and then work together. You can't do this on your own, and you can't let your relationships suffer because of him.

Good luck, whatever you decide to do may well be difficult to do but remember you have friends here to talk to and get support from.

{{{{hugs}}}}

Joan and the Griffs
Take the rough with the smooth

Would not dream of telling you to pull yourself together, for a start it's not helpfull and if you could you would. Think putting the beast in kennels for 2 to 3 days is a good idea, give you a chance to refuel the batteries and a bit of space to plan your next move. All the best and try to take a break - not a breakdown. Thinking of you Ja:)kie

Bet

I'm new to the forum and don't know about Jake of past but I read your post with tears in my eyes.

I had to have Tushka, my GSD, put to sleep nearly two years ago. I couldn't bear to be without a friend and six weeks later went to the local rescue centre to re-home another GSD. He was a nightmare. After a couple of weeks I phoned the rescue centre and told them to come and get him as I just couldn't cope with him. I was in floods of tears all the time. He was running rings round me. Then that evening I lie in bed thinking I was adding to his problems by giving him back, I had rescued him and I had to try and put things right. We've had Fogs 19 months now and everything has come together. It was very hard work, but I worked with him every day and put alot of time into him. He is now the most loveable, well behaved dog and has become a pleasure to own, a real true friend. I hope you can work it out. It seems like you have lots of friends on the forum to give you moral support but I know it isn't easy. Stick at it. Good luck.

Bloody Hell (sorry leigh ) Beth
How many times Have I whinged to you ?
I Know exactly how you feel ,I have hated Murphy more times than I care to mention -at least you're allowed in training classes ( for anyone else me and Murph where shown the red card at training school ,so now we have a field to ourselves --long story another post maybe )
they are re-incarnations truly :D
look in your in box
Liz

Hi honey, Im certainly not going to tell you to pull yourself together, thats no help at all. I agree with the others, put him in kennels for a long weekend, have a good relaxing time with your hubby and familiy and a good chat. Tell him that you need a bit more support, that its only a naughty teenage stage that the Mock is going through, and discuss seriously what you REALLY want to do, and then take it from there. We will always be here for you, to try and help, and be shoulders for the exasperation. xxxx

Sorry Beth, my previous post addressed you as 'Bet' it was a typo and not meant to be familiar.

Beth, believe me, I know what you are going through! My last two mals were absolute saints compared with the beast I have now - I believe he is not a dog - he is the devil incarnate;)
We have been going through this adolescent stage with Chewi since he was 10 months (now 14 months) and he is slowly getting better.
I thoroughly agree with the others - put Jake in kennels for a weekend and have a break even if it is only at home. My husband and I call it respite care. It is lovely being able to relax without wondering when and from which direction the whirling dervish will come.
I know how embarrassing it is as well, when everyone you know remembers your previous dogs and then sees the current one - it does make you feel inadequate and wondering what went wrong this time. I go through it regularly.
My advice is - take the respite care, even if you have to do it on a monthly basis - you need the rest.
Keep on with the training. It will work, and in a little while you will laugh about this period, I promise you.:D
Jean
P.S. Buy him a baseball hat for Christmas, then he can pretend he is Kevin the teenager (a la Harry Enfield);)

Hi Beth

I am NOT going to take the foregoing as an excuse for you not to give up smoking - even if it is just from your ears :-)

Yes, I know he is being a sod at the moment, saw that the other day but you can, will, and are coping well with him - it is not that long ago that he would not sit (and stay sat) when you told him to, at least now he will do that so you can get yourself a bit sorted out before the next onslaught

See you soon

Christine

Dear All of you lovely people

Thanks sooooo much. Okay so intially your posts just made me cry more but obviously I'm just tired and emotional (and I haven't even started on the wine yet, maybe better not !!)

The kennels idea is good but I have spoken to them and they are fully booked for the next two weeks and I wouldn't want to put him somewhere else...Maybe I do just need to go to bed early and get some sleep and wake up more positive tommorrow. I should really thank my lucky stars for the things he DOESN'T do I suppose. Funny really that he has never been destructive or anything and that all his naughtiness just shows itself in his behaviour towards me !! Maybe that DOES speak volumes...

Thank you to all my regular CD Friends and a big thanks to those that didn't know of me from Adam but just reponded out of pure kindness !! I really appreciate it. Also, for June - thanks for that, if the truth be known I too would lie in bed thinking of what I'd done, and I don't mind about you calling me Bet, familiar or not ;)

I knew that if I admitted how bad I felt on here, I would get some sensible advice, what I didn't realise is how much better I would feel afterwards...

Beth xxx

Awww, Bethie, sweetie, you poor thing :( :( :(

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OK,.... there's my moment of absolute empathic pathetic sympathy for you :)

Tomorrow's another day :) Take heart and restart ;) Be SCAAAAAALET ;)

It does sound like you need a break from him for a bit. I don't believe that dogs should be a 24/7 mandatory togetherness thing. That's why I like them so much better than kids!!!! :D :D :D
I also have a sneaking suspicion that what you told me last week about _____ going so well and you beginning again, has hit a dead spot. Is your confidence shaken down by that too? :(

Take a hot bubble bath...throw Mock into a crate/kitchen...and get out for an afternoon/evening. Clear your head and have fun. Come back home. Ignore him until the next morning and wade in for the scrimmage at the start while you're fresh :) :)

Ah well, it's a thought. If you can manage that, let me know. I could use some of that energy too ;) :rolleyes: :P
Seriously, don't loose hope. It's not the battle you're trying to win, its the war. And you know how long wars can last..... years :rolleyes: :P
You can do it and I'll be here rootin tootin away :)
toodles

Dear Beth,
You are not alone, believe me. Not too long ago I remember being at my wits end with my lot. I had a week old litter of puppies to care for and my other dogs were being real devils! I was suffering from whiplash after a recent car crash and one of the puppies had just died. I had had about six hours sleep in three days.My mum suggested a glass of wine to cheer me up but I ended up with malibu. It went straight to my head, the glass missed the table and smashed all over the floor. I got down to pick it all up as I was frightened for the dogs feet and smacked my back against the table. I just sat and cried for a hour.
Sometimes things just get too much. Have you got a friend or relative that could look after him, even if it was just for one night so you could try to have a good nights sleep and relax a little?
Take Care,
Amy (and her three devils!)

Hi Beth I hope things pick up and you do get the sleep you need and deserve.

I too had a devil dog, I put up with 2 years of hell, barking chewing fighting etc what made me rehome him :( was out for a walk one day he attacked one of my other dogs, I stepped in and smacked him and he turned on me, that was it I had had enough.

He went to another family with no other dogs in the household. he is very happy there and they have no problems at all. it looks like he needed a family that had just him and no other pets. so it all worked out in the end but it was a hard thing for me to do, but the best thing for him.

Beth

No one will tell you to pull yoursef together, we all have problems of some sort and are all here to help each other out...

{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}

Natasha

oh beth poor you - i myself have been having problems with my 'orrible lot of late and you have my full sympathy:) I think everyone's giving you good advice - take some time out and talk about what you really want to do and what is best for all of you - I'm sure after a couple of days of respite you will feel better and more able to deal with your thug! I find just relaying the days events (even if you are,all sick of my long posts!!!) really helps - I had a lovely walk the other day to the beach, all behaved (reasonably well) and had a swim in the sea and as I walked along with them charging in and out of the waves I'm found myself thinking how glad I was to have them - that's not to say I don't have horrendous days when I feel likeI'm a total failure :(. Don't be disheartened - they grow up - eventually:D You'll probably find after a day in kennels you'll miss him like crazy!! and want to pick him up early - hope it all works out for you. julie:)

would castration be an option -its not something ive ever had done-but it might work out for the both of you, it could just take the edge off a touch for you-you can try tablets first to see wether its likely to make any difference, --it could be worse, you might of been blind and he could of been your guide dog-he doesnt sound too far different from the dog my dads just returned -there!!!!! did that make you feel any better??

Oh Beth,
Been there, I think Fiona's idea is good as it will give you a bit of time to look at things with the pressure off.
I have felt so useless so often with different dogs but I promise you it will pass, I'm not going to give you advice about the little dear as at the moment you need to sort how you feel. First you are having a bit of trouble at the moment and that is all, it doesn't make you useless hopeless or a bad person, it just makes you human.
I was actually at the point where I dreaded taking Cava out in case he met another dog and wouldn't come back, but I sat down and thought about it, write things down if it helps, and once you are less stressed you will be able to see things in a more balanced way.
Please feel free to mail me direct if you like, I wish I was nearer so I could give more direct help and support. Have a good cry it doesn't hurt
My addy is AnneCavaDogatblueyonderdotcodotuk
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Anne

I am having the same problems with my rescue fiend from hell....sorry, I mean dog. I think Sarah's advice was very good, nearly exactly what my behaviourist told me. When mine stresses me out to the point of wishing he wasn't here, I have a long soak in the bath followed by a large gin & tonic and remember the story of friends who took their dog back to the rescue after getting to the end of their tether with his behaviour. They got halfway to the rescue and realised they were BOTH crying their eyes out, needless to say they turned back home and spent a difficult 5 months coping with/training their little horror, who is now a much loved well behaved pet. Some of the posts on here have made me cry, they are so touching.

For some practical support, could your vet put you in touch with an animal behaviourist? Perhaps if they observe and assess the relationship between you, that could help direct your training.

Just to agree with what everyone else has said here, Beth. We all have these low and very frustrating times with our dogs - I have had so many I have lost count :D My worst times were with my wheaten terrier who suffered with nervous aggression. If only this Forum had been around back then. :)

Hope things get better for you soon.

Joyce

I'm so sorry you're having a tough time with Jake, Beth. Having a dog with "character" can really take it out of you:( You do sound like you could desperately do with a break from him.
We haven't heard of any exploits from Banger and Max lately, and I wondered if the treatment Max had has worked, and may be worth talking to your vet about? Just a thought.
Thinking of you.
Lynn x

Book him into the kennel for the first available weekend, give you a couple of weeks to look forward to your weekend and plan what you wish to do with it.
Ja:)kie

I agree Beth take a break
I got fed up with all the work the dogs gave me when I was nursing Kieran and felt I could not go on doing both . I put the dogs in a good kennel for one week , and I felt recharged and able to cope . This was with dogs that gave no trouble at all . So we are all human and need a break .
I actually needed a break when I went to Dizzys for the weekend , I am recharged and able to face things again . We are all only human after all and anyone who never needs a break is very very lucky indeed
Mari

Beth
I am so sorry to hear you so down. :(
It is not silly at all, we all get frustrated.
I think Fiona's advice was very good. Take a break. :)
I hope you feel better soon. ;)
Nicky

HI Beth

Dont feel you are alone, we all get bad days with our dogs. I too have felt very depressed over BAnya, it has only lasted a few days and then things do get better. LIke the Mockodile she has her phases but I wouldn't swop her for the world ;)

I always feel better because I buy some chocolate (!), read a good dog training book to remind me what I am trying to achieve and that it's not always easy, and go for a dog walk with a friend who also is into training, and can be relied upon to cheeer me up and make me see things are not so bad :)

Putting him in kennels for a break is a good idea, put him in as soon as you can manage to get a space:)

Good luck, and remember - you are not alone!!!!! :D :)

Lindsay

.

Hi Everyone

Firstly, big apologies for being so dramatic yesterday but I suppose it just all got too much :o In time honoured tradition of the Mock doing the complete opposite of what I tell people about him, today he has been as good as gold. Could it be that he listened to and actually took on board some of the threats yesterday - I doubt it ;)

The kennels are booked for two weeks but he is booked in on the first available w/e which just happens to be my best friends BD and she's having a "do" in london on the saturday night and on the Sunday, I have found out that my old candian flatmate from France is coming through l'il ile England so that'll really be a w/e to look forward to.

In the meantime, I will just have to try and take deeper breaths and remember that
a) When we get into a fight situation, I can never win as it's not him that will end up crying in the corner
b) ONE DAY, he will become the perfect pooch :D ;)
c) Life was far more boring without him

I am also going to look into doing something part time so we're not driving each other mad every day and also doing more of the things I want to do...That bestseller will NOT write itself.

I really want to thank you all again for your kindness, it never ceases to amaze and touch me....

Beth xxxxxxxxx :)

P.S I also REFUSE to use this nonsense as an excuse for not giving up the fags. The Zyban has kicked in and official quit date is Tuesday, may be smoking a lot on Monday.....

Good for you Beth,
You know you already have a good subject-'The Mockadile Mysteries '
Glad things are better today ;)
the feeble woman :)

Glad things are a bit better today for you:) And this is coming from someone who KNOWS exactly where you're coming from- owing my very own Mockadilly:o Remember the new trousers Sean bought me for my birthday- when she ripped the back of them- the first time I wore them:o Honestly- she really is just as bad- shows me up everywhere I take her- one of the top breed specialist judges in the country-one of only ten in the country able to perform a breed survey on GSD's- are you following so far?- well he was trying to give me a few pointers re showing her teeth and she jumped up and nipped his nose:o The force of her jumping was so bad that he ended up with a nose bleed- and I don't mean a trickle either:o This was infront of quite a few others who have also been in the breed for 20+ years! Don't feel a failure- because if you do there are many more of us who need to join you in feeling that way;) I keep telling myself that when she's about 3/4 she'll be the perfect pet pooch:)

Chin up chuck;)

Stacey x x x

Hi Beth,
Glad you are feeling better and himself is more cooperative:-)
Anne

Yes I am glad as well you feel better about things. It always looks alot better after a good nights sleep !

Lucy

Been catching up with the board been off for a few days. Beth so sorry for you glad your chin is up now. :) Just wanted to say hello!
Julieann

"Just wanted to say hello", bless your heart
Thanks Julieann, it was that kind of comment that made me feel so much better!!!

Beth