Just wandered if anyone else has family, eg Parents and siblings, that just don't get why we love owning and showing our dogs.I've made some great friends through them and showing them gives me a hobby that gets me out of the house! My husband and children know how much the dogs mean to me, and I rarely have to ask for family help in ferrying the kids around if I'm at a show as we try to work it out between us.

So why do I feel so upset at their attitude? A classic example was at this years Crufts, we were walking back to the car after a long day when my Mum rang to see what time we would be home. She asked how we'd done and when told that we'd got 2nd with our puppy but nothing with my boy her reply was" Oh you won't bother going any more as you never do any good there do you"

Does anyone else have any more stories to tell that might persuade me that I'm not alone in this!

Luckily Parents and grandparents show!  So I have no problems there :)

So why do I feel so upset at their attitude?

Because this can be passive-aggression rather simple disinterest?

Nancy Roberts tells a story about how, when she was still struggling as an actress while her brother Tony was starring in Woody Allen films, she finally landed a good part on TV.  She played an eccentric who always wore a large hat; reviews were excellent but when her mother finally rang her, all she said was, 'Whatever you do don't buy the hat. Classic passive-aggression. Puts you down without overt nastiness.

I'm not saying this is the case with your family but it may explain why their attititude upsets you so much.

Yes I have a family who does not understand why I have my dog - my mom is a non dog lover but cares for Kez like her own and has been a constant support since we had him.

However my brother stop visiting my house four years ago because of him. He thinks Kez will eat both of his children all in one go - doesn't trust him and wants me to lock him away while he comes to visit - Sad thing is when his youngest boy who is 2 meets Kez at my moms he loves him and giggles like crazy but the other son screams with fright. I am very saddened by this whole situation.

So I know how you feel Biffsmum :o)

You're not alone Bifsmum. I come from a large allegedly close Greek family who I have to see most days but think I'm on another planet when it comes to my dogs. None of them come to my house unless its an emergency since I got my GSD ten years ago. I've had my third dog for 5 weeks but haven't bothered to tell them as I would only get abuse. Fortunately my kids take after me and love animals :-)

My Dad is always telling me that I should get rid of the older/retired dogs as surely they aren't any use?????

Surely if I am only showing two at a time that is all I need and I could give the others away!!!!

>  My Dad is always telling me that I should get rid of the older/retired dogs as surely they aren't any use?????

>Surely if I am only showing two at a time that is all I need and I could give the others away!!!!

You too ;-) None of my family understand my obsession with the dogs (their words :-) )Though I think my 2 daughters have an idea. Especially the older one as she did some showing when she was younger.

My older brother lives abroad and gives me plenty warning when he is coming home for a few weeks so that I can make sure I have time to go and see him. He won't come to the house unless he absolutely has to. Mind you, he is frightened of dogs. My other brother has 2 rescue ex racing greyhounds and older brother will quite happily visit him. After all, his dogs are couch potatoes. :-D

My mum can be quite spitefull at times to me. She will ask what im doing the weekend,and i say walking the dogs of course with hubby. The reply i get is those dogs take your life over,is that all you think about.
They just dont understand how much our dogs mean to us.
One of my girls has not been to well lately and when i tell my mum she just seems disinterested and will say ive not been to good either.
I think she is almost jealous of the dogs,if that doesnt sound silly.

My parents both passed on now , loved dogs and passed it on to me but my only sister cant stand them , she had a soft coated wheaten and rehomed it  cos she couldnt cope . then came a lurcher and the poor thing is ignored half the time (she only had them cos her 2nd husband loved dogs ) i havent seen or heard from her in 3 years , although she has arab horses and loves them to pieces
sorry but imo , its no great loss  love me love my mutts

I've had it and do have it from family, though they all love dogs, i was raised with dogs, but they seem to think if i have one why would i want another?? They also say i;m obsessed with my dogs.
TBH my friends are getting sick of me to a certain extent, the non doggy ones, they ask what i am doing on so and so day, well i have to walk the dogs twice, so if you want to meet either fit it around the dog walks or i bring them along. I have had to cancel dinner with friends as i have come back from a show later than expected and was too too tired to be able to do anything other than slob on the sofa. They were not impressed.
The one thing that gets me is that friends with kids are the same, you still have to look after them and if something comes up have to cancel say if they are ill or babysitter lets them down. So i see no real difference here other than i'm not maternal towards children.

None of my family show and they don't understand it let alone want to take any real interest in it. I have invited them along to shows, but they turn their noses up at it. Though they were interested in my day at Crufts, thats the only time i've been asked about a show. As for my wins, they are pleased for me but don't ask any questions.

BUT on the flip side i have made some wonderful friends through the dog world and they are wonderful people and we can all go dog walking together and they understand you as well.
So i may be loosing some outside of the dog world, but again i have gained many new ones who i cherish as well.

I think my father feels i'll never meet Mr right if i spend all my time with dogs, how about meeting someone in the dog world i say, no there's a thought, there must be many single, straight lovely guys out there who aren't over the age of 35..Anyone know of any??

However my brother stop visiting my house four years ago because of him.

mine too, you should tell him what i told mine, the dogs love kids but couldnt eat a whole one in one go!

Luckily my whole family and extended are all into dogs one way or another so not a problem, but I have a friend who I feel so very sorry for.

Her parents had 2 dogs throughout her childhood, a Cocker and then a JR, now the JR towards the end of it's life had all scabs on it's back (can't remember what was wrong with it) but I can remember her mother sat picking these scabs of it's back, (it made me feel sick) and I could always smell their dog in the home. Anyhow this dog died and they didn't replace it afterwards so they now have a dog free home.

My friend (married with children now) bought a Cav and knowing her parents had had dogs all their life didn't see it as a problem but was promptly told that the dog would not be welcome in their home (as they are messy and lose hair) and she could not bring it around at Christmas (guess who ended up looking after her dog - ME :-D ) neither of us could understand this, having a Cav you have to get more don't you? :-D So she now has 3 Cav's and her family literally treat her like a leaper, they don't go to her home anymore and I have to be honest her home is clean and tidy, doesn't smell, the dogs are very well behaved, there is no reason for her family to treat her like this.

Between the two of us, we have never worked out their reaction towards her having dogs. I was at a wedding with her last year and I couldn't believe what her sister said to her when she walked in. "Oh, you'd never guess looking at you that you have dogs!" my friend is in no way a slob and always looks well manicured, I could see she was so hurt.

I don't understand their sudden detest of dogs, I really don't.

I've been made to feel weird in the past for my interest in showing/training and just generally owning dogs, particularly as a teenager, I was not cool enough as I should have been in the park drinking cider and smoking - not walking dogs lol!

Now as a married woman with 2 children, I look upon these people as the unfortunate ones... I would never swap my life for theirs...

Some of my friends and relatives don't understand why I need so many dogs and some can't believe I'd let my young children anywhere near them.  They're the ones that need pitying that they can't see past the end of their noses long enough to ever enjoy life with dogs...  They don't deserve them anyway...

Pity them and count yourself lucky that you get to enjoy your life with your dogs...

i agree with muttsinbrum,it's pasive aggression.trying to belittle and undermine you without appearing to.never mind,there are more people in your life who are on your side than there are small minded types.there's nothing remotely wrong with loving your dogs and wanting to show them off,so pooh to anyone who nothing good to say about it.hope you win first prize next time with both of your babies,but even if you win nothing you get to take home your little stars.x

this is why this site is a god sent!!!! i grew up with dogs and most of my family are dog lovers they just dont get the pedigree or the showing thing and i get comments like....you paid how much for a dog/you treat them dogs like babies/just leave them they be alright (when i refuse to go to family events/holidays) why carnt you use normal food, shampoo, dog brushes etc lol
When we had our first litter which produced four puppies my family members said i 'WOULD BE LOADED' little did they no about stud fees, vet fees, kept one and the six weeks unpaid leave from work set us back about £2000! never mind i got my doggy friends who understand x

> I think she is almost jealous of the dogs,if that doesnt sound silly.

it doesn;t sound silly, from what you;ve said it sounds likely.

> They also say i;m obsessed with my dogs.
>

(clears throat and stands up...) "Hello. I'm Kim, and i am obsessed with dogs!"

I am not ashamed!

my family are doggy to and they think i'm a bit nutty, but then they have always thought that :) and my friends chose me despite it :) and for those moments of total geekdom i have you fine people :)

remember the next time they are mean to you, to err is human, to forgive canine ;)

> I look upon these people as the unfortunate ones... I would never swap my life for theirs...
>
>

This is what I think too, to never feel the joy of trust and friendship with another creature......it's like they totally miss the point of life.  The sad thing is that they will never even understand what they are missing.

Astarte you are spot on Canines do not care that I am overweight OK Fat! they dont care if I get out of bed looking like I wrestled all night. They dont care who I am, what i wear, who my friends are, what I do for a living. They just love ME! and I love them fox pooh and all.
Remember another addage you are stuck with your family, you choose your friends.

My brother has no pets, he thinks my dogs are a tie yet he loves my cocker to pieces!!

My inlaws are doggie people, my own parents had dogs 24/7 all my life time, I am so sorry you have odd relatives that dont like dogs, cheer up they may get better and a heart transplant at some point of time. I have extra love to go around now my son's have left home so Ive got dog!!! If I had realsied they dont eat so much as teenagers years ago I'd have got the kids to leave earlier!!!!!!

> If I had realsied they dont eat so much as teenagers years ago I'd have got the kids to leave earlier!!!!!!

Not only do they eat less than teenagers, they do as they are told, go to bed when you ask them, dont sit up all night gaming on the internet, welcome you as if they havn`t seen you for ages when really you only went to put the bin out, they listen to you when you are having a moan and they are non opinionated....I could go on for hours lol

Lisa and the Velcro dog xx

when my lab, poppy is fast asleep on my knee it is pure bliss.she's a big lump of love.x

On a first date with a man, he actually sniffed me and said "Oh, you don't smell like you have dogs". Needless to say, it wasn't a long lasting relationship!

You should have said "you dont smell like a tackless git" or reading it didn't last long you did!

don't smell like you have dogs!he makes it sound like a disease.x

there's more chance of my dogs washing up and doing the drying than there is of my sons doing it! :-)