You may or may not remember a post I wrote a while ago about my girls, it was when they had gone missing.
Well I am writing again just to update, although christmas was good, new year's was bad, Jan was terrible and Feb has been sad, were still holding it together. My youngest most definitely learnt her lesson, but the eldest was still pushing boundaries. I say was because she was put in respite "care" at the beginning of Feb this was for four weeks. It only came about after they shunted her around, OH poor dad was guilt tripped into having her for over a week. He is an ill man and lumping her on him was not on! Well OH kicked off in a major way, he did i'm afraid swear and call people names and although its not a excuse I truly understand why he did, when you get to a point where no-one listens and your world feels quite like its crumbling away you most definitely lose it.
She has been home two weeks now and so far so good, though I am not foolish to believe (as horrid as that sounds) this is how it will always be, we feel she will still try to push boundaries. At times we feel emotionaly blackmailed, and like giving up, things have been calm to a point but we take each day as it comes. Besides I know as much as we have been through you take the rough with the smooth, we'll stand by her forever, and I no its cliche but there are far more people worse off than us.
You may well ask why I am writing on here again, (apologies for the delay) I guess to let you all no how things are going but also to reiterate how over whelmed I was by all your thoughts, help, kind words and messages at such a low and difficult time for my family and I.
Thanks for your support it was and will always be appreciated.
Bless you all Diane xx

Diane, thank you for the update.  I will keep my fingers crossed for you in hope that the situation improves from now on, you certainly deserve that after all you have been through.  Thinking of you........

Hi Diane,

of course we remember you :)  I'm sorry to learn that you've been on a bit of a roller coaster the last couple of months and sincerely hope that the signs are good for things calming down for you.

As you say, there's always someone worse off but at the most emotional and traumatic times in our lives it's just a catch phrase with little meaning.

Thanks for updating the forum - there are lots of folks around who will remember you and be wishing you well.  Think of it as a 'club' where you're always welcome and where there are many shoulders to lean on when needed :)

very best wishes,
Teri

I really hope things come good for you , your daughter and family and that next Christmas will be a happier time .
We are always here to listen with a mug of tea and a pack of biccies .

Thanks for the update Diane, I hope you can manage to keep things going. I think most of us who respond are really able to feel for you, probably as parents or once wayward ourselves. Nothing is ever black and white so we can respond. Try to stay positive, and remember thjat nothing lasts forever, good or bad.
Karen

> I no its cliche but there are far more people worse off than us.

I used to work with an adopters and foster carers support team and it was this very sentiment that helped people to speak out.  If you have the courage to talk about your situation and your problems it can be helpful for you but also for those that are privileged to hear you 'speak'.

When you are in crisis it can be difficult to be objective and to imagine a time beyond the moment but I can assure you that in addition to the level of support you received here last time - your story will have given support too.  There are always families struggling to manage and you may have given someone the momentum to get some help and emotional support too, so well done Diane and thanks for the update xxx

I remember you well, Diane, and the terrible heartache you were going through, and have wondered how you were getting on. I'm glad your daughters are still safe, and hope that will last a long, long time.

Diane, I'm so sorry to hear that the year hasn't started well for you and your family.  I guess you always knew that unfortunately there would be no 'quick fix' for your daughter, only time and her growing up will make her see that she can't continue the way she's going for everyone's sake.  I can also completely understand the frustrations your OH is feeling and no-one can blame him for venting it.

I hope things settle down for you and that you can finally have the family life you deserve.

Thank you for keeping us posted.

Regards

Simone

I was thinking of you the other day Diane, I really hope that things carry on going well, got everything crossed for you. Thanks for keeping us updated! :-)
Alice xx

Thank you for letting us know how things are going. I hope things continue to improve for you and will send lots of positive thoughts your way. Being a parent can be terribly hard at times.

Diane,

My heart does go out to you and not sure how you have kept afloat all this time.
As you know in my work we have to find the runaways and give support to the families as well.

Some kids, especially girls i speak to who decide to run off and do their own thing when they want have no actual reason for doing what they are doing. They are rebelling and not thinking about what its doing to the parents/guardians back home, and to be honest sometimes they don't care..  I have seen some of these girls grow up, change and stop running off and give complete respect to their parents in time. Its lovely to see whan they turn a corner, most do and this is what we must keep hoping for with your girl.

If you need any advice please PM me, i tend to peek a look when i have a spare couple of seconds at work..:-o

Oh Diane, I was thinking of you recently too. Come on in and get lots of {{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}

I lost touch with my son for nearly 10 years, but we are now very close. It's a time I don't want to wish on anyone. The 'where did I go wrong' and the blame I put on myself for a long time were talked about at length once he turned up on my doorstep. He has always said that he doesn't think I did anything wrong, it was just 'things'. I do hope and pray that your daughter will come round in time.

lindylou I have one who is doing his own thing in Kent Im in Hampshire, I feel I cannot tell him to do anything in case he does not come and visit me. Umm I feel for you, they do not realise how much heartache they are causing whilst they are off finding themselves, they just think of today only and what they want. Its hard being a Mum, they arent my OH's either so its not always easy to explain things to his Dad my OH. His biological father has not been seen for about 7 or 8 years.

> Think of it as a 'club' where you're always welcome and where there are many shoulders to lean on when needed :-)
>

Thankyou, I think this is probably why I could tell you all and ask for help/support because of the way everyone is so welcoming, kind and caring. :-)

Diane

> will be a happier time

This is our one big hope.

> We are always here to listen with a mug of tea and a pack of biccies

Thanks :-)
Diane

Diane.....I remember you and I am glad you have updated us as I oftern wonder if youre ok.
Like others have said CD er's will always be here for you
Take Care
Philly xx

> I hope you can manage to keep things going

So do I.

> Try to stay positive, and remember thjat nothing lasts forever, good or bad

I am, we take each day as it comes.
But the huge support helps alot. :-)

Diane

> your story will have given support too.

> There are always families struggling to manage and you may have given someone the momentum to get some help and emotional support too,

I never really thought of it like that, I hope that some good can come from our experiences.

Diane

> Some kids, especially girls i speak to who decide to run off and do their own thing when they want have no actual reason for doing what they are doing. They are rebelling and not thinking about what its doing to the parents/guardians back home, and to be honest sometimes they don't care..

Nail on the head.
Oh how I wished sometimes I had a magic key to open up my daughters head, to look inside a find the answer why.

> If you need any advice please PM me, i tend to peek a look when i have a spare couple of seconds at work..:-o

Thankyou xx
Diane

> I was thinking of you recently too. Come on in and get lots of {{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}

Thanks I do sometimes need them.

> but we are now very close.

I'm please to hear that things can have a good outcome :-)

> I do hope and pray that your daughter will come round in time.

Us too.
Thanks
Diane