Andy Hedges All rights reserved.



Reasons Dogs Don't Use Computers
20. Can't stick their heads out of Windows '95.
19. Fetch command not available on all platforms.
18. Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side.
17. Too difficult to "mark" every website they visit.
16. Can't help attacking the screen when they hear "You've Got Mail."
15. Fire hydrant icon simply frustrating.
14. Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway they're browsing www.pethouse.com instead of working.
13. Keep bruising noses trying to catch that MPEG frisbee.
12. Not at all fooled by Chuckwagon Screen Saver.
11. Still trying to come up with an "emoticon" that signifies tail-wagging.
10. Oh, but they WILL... with the introduction of the Microsoft Opposable Thumb.
9. Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome
8. 'Cause dogs ain't GEEKS! Now, cats, on the other hand...
7. Barking in next cube keeps activating YOUR voice recognition software.
6. SmellU-SmellMe still in beta test.
5. SIT and STAY were hard enough, GREP and AWK are out of the question!
4. Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to manuever.
3. Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.master's.leg.
2. Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms.

and the Number 1 Reason Dogs Don't Use Computers...

1. TrO{gO DsA[M,bN HyAqR4tDc TgrOo TgYPmE WeIjTyH P;AzWqS,. *

LOL

:D

Melody

ROFLMBO!!!!! :)
Haven't seen this one before. Very original :D
thanx :)

:D :D :D <<<vg>>> LOL
Dot

Very good !!:D :D

Lucy

Oi! Both my lads can use computers! On various occasions, they went to my NVQ course with me - and I suspect that they learned more than I did! :D I'll bet also that they remember far more about PCs than I do, too - having been a Mac user for a couple of years now, I've forgotten things like Windows!

I have joined an exclusive club, together with the Blue Eyed Border Boys, the motto of which is..........

"A PC is a Mac for an idiot" :D

<<<<< whisks self back to Twilight Zone, before he gets scragged.....:D

P.S. - it was Dog Junior who built my webbie! <GG>

Well, they are Border Collies! :D :D
LynnT

And in a fit of extreme generosity, one of them has just re-wired a light in my porch - practising, of course, for doing the whole house..... :)

Just remembered this: when we lived in Edinburgh, there was a vennel near us where everyone walked their dogs for "business", so all dogs were interested. We called it "PIEDISH" - Plug-In Exchange Dog Information Super Highway :D

Oooh Snorri ...Vennel? Is this an alleyway or parkland ?..do tell :)

Melody - I like the idea of PIEDISH lol

A vennel ......is that like a jigger or a cooee ??
Liz
ps don't like the idea of the dogs doing their stuff in a pie dish :D :D

You've never heard of a vennel?:) Didn't know it must be a scottish word :)

Not good at describing but.......a vennel is a covered alleyway between buildings (if you get what I mean!) It's like a 2 or 3 storey building with an open walk through area from front to back of building at ground level. Can be just for someone to walk through or big enough to drive a car through.

Reading this I've confused myself so don't know what I've done to the rest of you :) :D
Dot

you mean ginnel or gennel or jennel surely!

Nope Longdog, definitely Vennel.:) but I've just realised I don't have a clue what Liz is talking about a "jigger" or a "cooee"
Dot

Morning ..sorry afternoon Dot ,
a jigger is a little pathway ,sometimes between two terraced houses with an archway or alittle path round the back of somewhere like a shortcut and a cooee is pretty much the same ........see I've confused my self now !!!!:)