I should have known, when I first picked him up ....his breeder did absolutely everything for him......and now, 44 years later, I've finally had to accept that early training (or lack of it) counts for everything :rolleyes:

He had to learn the hard way :  if he wanted a cup of coffee with sugar - then he had to add the sugar himself ...AND stir it!  (Oh sorry - maybe I should have said that I was talking about OH :rolleyes: !)    He learned that if he wanted clean clothes they had to be put in the wash AND then taken out and put away ....He readily accepted training as a parent, and made a loving, attentive and good dad.

However, there are certain fields in which my training still comes to naught - and I've finally given up.    One would think that 44 years of all training re cleaning the bathroom after use would have resulted in some semblance of clenliness.  Sadly, the answer is no....it doesn't - and after screaming at him every morning for the last 6 months for him to "come right back here and clean up the mess that you have left" - wet towels on the floor, blood all over the washbasin from cutting himself shaving, etc etc etc.   Well, by persuading him to use an electric shaver, we no longer have blood everywhere (and of course he no longer wanders around at breakfast time with toilet paper stuck all over his face :D).   But toothpaste left in the basin ....yeugh!!!!!

So this morning, I found myself sighing, picking up the towels and cleaning the basin - and not screaming :)   But I did come downstairs & demand that he make me a fresh pot of coffee - so much better for my blood pressure :D

Margot

Tsk Margot, you're expecting him to multi-task. Breathing and tidying? Come on .... :rolleyes: ;) :D

Oh I so agree with you Margot - that early training is just so important :D  I don't think it is deliberate disobedience just that the memory span is not always up to par - you are expecting him to remember something that he was told 24 hours previously (even though you have reinforced the command for the past 40 odd years ) so are probably asking the impossible :D

I got so fed up with my son putting socks out for washing still screwed up into balls and me having to flatten them out for washing that, in the end, I used to leave them screwed up. They went into the washing machine and then were hung  on the line still in screwed up form and returned still screwed up. Of course the middles never dried properly and eventually he got the message that the only way to get clean,dry socks was to unroll them before they went in the washing basket :D

My DIL is making sure the required behaviour is now being proofed in a different location :D

>I got so fed up with my son putting socks out for washing still screwed up into balls and me having to flatten them out for washing that, in the end, I used to leave them screwed up. They went into the washing machine and then were hung  on the line still in screwed up form and returned still screwed up. Of course the middles never dried properly<

oh I thought I was the only one that did that Lizzie :D and pockets full of sweet wrappers, jumpers half inside out :rolleyes: they all get put back the same way.
Hate finding toothpaste in the sink, but worse is finding 2 false teeth on top of the breadbin!!! soon put a stop to that though, I 'accidently' nudged them onto the floor and they were snatched by the dog who - not encouraged by me - chewed them a little bit. At the cost of a new set he is now more careful where he leaves them !!!!

LMAO Dee - of course you would never have encouraged the dog would you Dee!!! LOL

LOL, Margot :D :D :D My future DIL is going to have a hard time with my son :D :D :D OH is finally getting trained after 26 years - he now can operate the washing machine, vacuum, dishwasher. He can even clean the loo (and bathroom) now :D :D :D However, he hasn't found the iron yet (although maybe I'd rather he didn't :) :) ) He's always been an excellent cook, so no worries there. There is always hope - they can get there in the end :D :D :D Just wish that he would learn to tidy the garage so that I can actually get in it to get to the freezer (which is always covered with tools and sawdust :( )

Daisy

Yuk!  the toothpaste in the sink is one that I hate and cant get my OH out of - also hanging towels on the bedroom door instead of back in the bathroom, dirty clothes on top of the wash basket instead of lifting the lid - how difficult can it be!!

Once I tried putting his dirty washing that was down the side of his bed back in his wardrobe - he didnt even notice just wore it again, I tried not ironing - he just wore it creased.

Think he was training me really:rolleyes:

Maxine

ROFL
Here all attempts have failed, with young 'uns too!
Consequently it's a case of 'if you cant beat  them join them'.
I just dont like unexpected vistitors..........but  had 2 overnight on Monday:rolleyes:
Stranded waifs....more joys of island life. (love it really)
Karen

Thank goodness for CD!!
I thought that maybe my training skills needed improving due to me being with my OH for 12 years now and he still:

Leaves the toilet seat up!, puts tools and stuff ever on my chest freezer or on my dining table, doesn't know how to operate the washing machine, leaves his dirty clothes on the bedroom floor, oh I could go on and on,
but now I know there are others out there that are having the same teething problems as I, and there is no training manual that comes with them is there?

Anyone have an OH who has 3 piles of clothes on the bedroom floor- 1 clean, 1 worn once & able to be worn again, 1 dirty which eventually makes its way to the laundry basket about a foot away from it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No - but when my son lived at home he used to put clean washing in the dirty bin because he couldn't be bothered to put it away in the drawers :D :D :D

Daisy

That is what my little (16 and 20) bleeders so, and any I find that obviously is clan and often still partly folded I put back in their clean piles.

My sons room is so disgustingly untidy I can barely open the door.

I had a complete blitz on it a few months ago and tidied evertything, the contenets of both wrdroe adn cupboard,a dn within a few weeks it was as bad as ever so I just close the doro and refuse to do it again.  Won't have it decorated until it is spick and span.

Oooh Daisy, I've had that too!!! :rolleyes:

Karen

Yep, it's all down to early training.

My dear departed M-I-L gave birth to five children and once the oldest reached his teens became a semi-invalid and enjoyed ill-health for the rest of her life.  The result?  Three boys and two girls who were not only fully domesticated but could budget on a shoestring and perform all routine household maintenance (F-I-L was similarly afflicted). 

I tried to emulate her liberating example but, sadly, with only limited success.

I have the opposite MIL :(

She brought her boys up to do NOTHING, they weren't even allowed to make a cup of tea anything dropped was whisked away so fast no-one saw who did it and her OH wasn't allowed even to lift a paintbrush as he'd do it wrong :rolleyes:   At 23 my daughter is only just being allowed to make coffee in MIL's house :rolleyes:

Consequently I have an OH who thinks the bathroom and toilet cleans itself, cupboard doors shut of their own volition and never picks up after himself   If I'm away and he wants dinner he goes to his mother or a cafe :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

I'm not going to curse my future SIL/DIL tho ;)   Young-Un is currently doing the Bedroom Challenge :D  Each day I give him a challenge (todays was to pick up and tidy away all 'leafy objects' (books papers, magazines etc. ) :D :D ) and in a few days time his room will be clean :D :D then he gets a treat!  I also encourage him to make his bed, do his own sarnies, make drinks and help with washing up etc. :D :D  and he enjoys it :) :)  he knows he is so important in the house :) :)

I was a truly Wicked Mother :D

Once No 1 son reached the age of 12, I told him that now he was growing up, he had Special Privileges .... he could learn to use the washing machine AND the iron :D   And so, on a Monday evening, he would carefully sort his washing into whites & coloureds ...and use the washing machine   And on Tuesday evenings, he would carefully iron it all AND put it away :D :D :D  

And so it went on, when DD reached 12, she too could use the washing machine - on a Tuesday evening .......No 2 son - a Wednesday evening, No 3 son a Thursday evening - which left me Friday, Saturday & Sunday to do sheets & towels & mine & OH's machine (he never reached such lofty heights as a Special Evening :rolleyes:) .

We then progressed to cooking ........Each of them (OH included) had one day of the week on whcih they could cook - anything they liked (within a certain budget, and provided I was told in time enough to do the shopping for it - complete shopping list required ;) ) - and I would cook at weekends (I also made the cakes :) )

So I have pushed out into the world 4 people who can cook (and budget) and also wash & iron .....so how comes I'm left with the one who cant :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

It all comes down to early training :D

Margot

Margot, can you come and live with me for a few years please? What night would be my special night?
I used to feel really sorry for my mum as we had a twin tub and a wash took half the day so I would volunteer to wash and iron for her - my kids &OH can't even put the stuff in an automatic without being asked and then I have to remind them to take it out. Ironing we do week about between the four of us but they always have to be asked to do it - why are mums the only ones who can see what needs done in a house?

The minute i find something back in the wash that hasn't been worn because they couldn't make the effort to put it away, i refuse to wash or iron anything of theirs for a month, nothing irritates me more (except the toilet seat being left up!!)
Marion

Margot that's perfect!

Troll-girl was encouraged to cook, but wasn't really interested.  Encouraged to wash her clothes - ditto etc etc.  Yet now she's moved in with her Boyf she's gone all domesticated   She cooks, and rings me up to find out what my 'secret ingredients' are :) she's even trying to sneak veggies into her OH LOL  and she washes the clothes, keeps the place clean etc   She also watches their budget like a hawk :D :D

Love the idea of - "Now you're 12 ... "  :D

Will remember that for Little-Un :D  He's already interested in cooking :)  and very good at reading labels on food LOL

So what should I be looking for in a young lad??? :D :D :D :D

When OH and I got together he had already been living away from home at University for 3 years so was more than capable of looking after himself ;)  He was well known for being a good cook and his roast chicken dinners were legendary among those he had shared accommodation with during those years :) 

Mind you, ten years on, he still hasn't grasped the concept of picking wet towels up off the bathroom floor :rolleyes:

So what should I be looking for in a young lad???

If he hasn't received the proper initial training run the other way :D

LOL so should I find out from the breeder how he was soclisied!? :D  and what sort of training she used so I can carry on? (clicker etc)

Yes it is very important to keep up their training and to be consistant.
Mary

LOL :D

If only it was as simple as the dogs hey?

(Must say my boyfriend is quite well trained.  After leaving home at 17 and living in a different country from his parents he does seem to be quite clean and tidy most of the time, infact I think it's me who needs more training to be honest!) :D :D :D :D :D

I knew I had my work cut out when my M-in-law said in shock 'oh don't you put his clothes out for him in the morning'   Well some things have improved but he still has no dress sense.   He fitted a new cheap toilet seat (proudly for he is not a handyman) and it has to be held up or it comes crashing down :-) :-)  At least it is always down for me now.  It is a bit embarrasing for visitors but I have held off going to replace it with a better one.