Please read before you come down on me!!!!!!
Last week I really thought I was going to loose Gemma. When I was on my own I couldnt stop crying. I kept lookig at her thinking it was my last few days with her. The night before she went to the vets for the Xray I was hysterical at one point.
The morning she was in the vets, I couldnt concentrate, My boss just let me get on with what I coould as I was away with the fairies so to speak.
My stomach was in my throat for the whole time, from when #I woke to when the vet called to say I could pick her up in an hour. And that hour seemed like the longest hour I have ever had. I wanted to go to the vets and sit outside for the whole hour waiting.
Now I know I will go through all this again. As how many dogs actually die peacefully.
The Pain I had last week thinking I was going to loose her actually made me think it would be easier to give all 3 away and then I would never have to go through that again :( :( :( As it was more painful than anything I have been through before (NOT that I could EVER give up my babies!!!)
How do you all cope having a sick dog, having to put a dog to sleep. Having to sit there wondwering if they will come out of the anasthetic, come out of the Xray without being told it is best to PTS?????
The people I know see dogs as 'Pets' NOt part of the family!!!! So dont understand.
I know there was something else I was going to ask, but i cannot remember.
Lea.

Lea the honest answer - I dont' know but each time I have lost a dog (and sadly three times I have had to make the brave decision to PTS) I didn't think I would ever ever get over it.  When we lost our second dog 6 months within another we remained dogless, having said no more can't go through it, but 6 months later we got Sacha (that was 12 years ago).

And the last time we made that tough decision was 5 years ago with my English Jazz - loser her hit me v. hard - she was first dog I had from puppy and she was taken too young from me too with cancer - (welling up now remember that awful awful day saying goodbye - I held her to the end). I knew it was the right time as she really didn't want to go on - her eyes told me.  It took me 2 years to get over Jazz - only then it was my OH who suggested time for another addition - so Max came into my life.

Sacha is 12 and still going strong - she has had some ups and downs but is still incredibly strong and well.  And if I don't want to think about the time - but I know its a good few years off.

Lea - like you they are like family to me so it is like losing a family member, sometimes worse (they are there through thick and thin and love unconditionally.

My only advice is not to think about the loss if you can and just like a family member be strong through the tough times.

{Hug}

Rach

Bit of a cliché, but better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.  Also as they are entirely dependent on us we owe it to them to ensure they have quality of live over quantity.

Oh Lea, you felt like that because you cared and love Gemma - it is normal!

I understand how you felt, some people can't concentrate if they are upset and worried, other people seem to throw themselves into something - I'm like you I'm afraid and all the feelings you described are what I went through when Spangler was ill and when we had to make the decision to have him PTS :( :(  I never thought I'd ever get over it - and in some ways I haven't it still hurts, and I still shed a tear for him and on the 1st anniversary of his death I was in bits :( I never had the time to say goodby to him and to tell him I loved him one last time and that feeling haunts me :(

But the answer to your question are they worth it? YES without a shadow of a doubt - our dogs give us so much and become a huge important part of our lives and to never have that would be awful.  After Spangler died I never thought I could have another dog, but the house without him for just a few weeks was so empty we quickly made the decision to have another and it was one of the best decisions we've made!

Having a dog PTS is one of the most heartbreaking decisions we as dog owners have to make but it's a decision most of us make for their sake and to put them out of pain - it is our last act of love and kindness that we can do for them.

It is such a pity their lives are comparitively short to ours - but then again, if we had them for any longer the pain would still be no easier when we have to let them go :( :( :(

Those 12/13 years or more if you are lucky are well worth it and at least we can help them along in their final days, unlike what we can do with our family members.

> unlike what we can do with our family members

Too true :( :(

Daisy

Honestly?  No idea.  I've only lost one dog, and it was less than 24 hours from her being apparently healthy to being PTS (she had osteosarcoma, we didn't know until it broke her leg).  Broke my heart, and I wasn't there to see her go - that makes it infinitely harder I find, much harder to cope as personally I need that closure.  Same thing happened to one of my cats, and as with Opi (the dog) I spent a couple of months half expecting to see them come round the corner.

So personally I find it much easier to cope if I'm with them when they go - but it's still very hard :( In November I lost my last cat, with her I had 2 weeks from first symptom to PTS and I held her as she went; hardest thing I've ever had to do, but I owed it to her to be there.  Still miss her terribly, as I do my other oldie cat who was PTS a month before.

My Dad actually worries about this - he's concerned about how I'll cope when the dogs I have now pass on, and I have said to him that in all honesty, I'll be devastated - Remy especially, he is my soul dog :) I think he's like the people you know - he doesn't see dogs quite as much as family members as I do, and he's asked why I'd get them knowing what I'll have to go through when they die; he certainly can't understand why even though I know there'll be so much pain on my part, I'vew got 3 dogs and another on the way (he doesn't know about that one though!).  I can't explain it to him, but I could never be without them.  I've done the hysterical thing too, so I know how you felt - always with Remy, he's far more sensitive a dog than I've thought him to be and I'm only just realising it; quite a few times I've had dreadful nights where I've thought he wouldn't make it, he'd get torsion etc.  A few months back I had a horrible week where I was worried he had osteosarcoma - false alarm, but it was dreadful.  I was worried all the time he was being neuetered, and having the x-ray for that leg; and all the time Opi was being neutered, more so as hers was slightly more complicated than normal spays.  Right now I'm worried for Soli, as I found a new lump on her thigh the other day that's not moving like her two fatty lumps.  But we get on with it, don't we?  When it comes down to it, everyone here knows their dogs are more than worth the bad days and sleepless nights.

My, that got a bit long!  Sorry :)

To risk nothing is to have nothing.

If we didn't have our dogs we wouldn't risk the heartbreak of losing them , but then we wouldn't have the joy of their company either and, as hard as it is to say goodbye, our lives are so much richer for having had the privilege of their company, friendship and loyalty.

Although the pain of losing them is such a difficult thing to deal with it is also a great tribute to them - if they hadn't touched our lives in such an amazing way we wouldn't take their loss as hard as we do.

Oh the times I've thought the very same thing Lea, but the answer always is YES they are worth it.

A few years ago I went through a really rough patch. My brother died, the next month I had to have my first borzoi, (1st show dog, 1st champion, who meant the world to me) put to sleep and then the next month my Mother, who was my best friend, died. I didn't think I could ever go through that pain again, having lost so much in such a short space of time. At that time I had a son and daughter of the dog that was pts, they were still pups and I loved them so much, especially the bitch who was the mirror image of her sire. I gave them both away as I couldn't face them dying too. I thought it was better to have the pain now of parting with them, than to love them for years and then lose them. The 3 borzois and 1 collie I had left I tried not to get too attached too - but of course I couldn't help it, and it was them that helped me to enjoy life again. When their time came to go to the bridge I was again heartbroken but knew that I would have more to follow in their pawprints :) 

you cannot protect yourself from pain unless you protect yourself from love ....and those of us who choose to share our lives with dogs are surrounded by love .
yes the pain of losing them is immense ...but I pity those who never feel this because it means that they have never also known the joy.

We are not here to lead empty sterile 'safe' lives but to LIVE - sorrow is part of life and the tears we shed are a tribute to those we love.

Yvonne

i havnt lost mine yet and hope its many long years befopre i do and when it happens its going to destroy me, but yes its worth it because my life is wonderful at the moment with him by my side, and at the risk of sounding horrible, i know that i will have another dog when i loose him it doesnt undermine what i feel right now.

With love there is always pain and that is very difficult to come to terms with sometimes :)

However the joy love brings I think really compensates for the pain even though at the time it doesn't feel like it :rolleyes::rolleyes:

What you are feeling is natural so don't beat yourself up about it and I will always be on the end of the phone for you if you need me ;)

Lucy
xx

Not sure either at this point in time, although I love my dog dearly and wouldn't change him for the world but he has been so ill and it's been such a struggle I feel as if I've aged terribly, and I'm now completely neurotic about his health. He developed megaesophagus about 7 months ago, aged two and a half, and we are managing the condition but it's a horrible horrible disease. I'm joined to the yahoo group and everyone there is in so much pain over their dogs, it's completely heart breaking. Having had 2 healthy dogs before him, who didn't develop illness until 11 and 12 years and then had to be pts, and then having a young dog be constantly afflicated with terrible ill health right from a small pup has made me question whether I will do this again.

I always feel the joy and love they bring throughtout their lives far outways all the pain that comes when they cross to the Bridge. I have lost 2 dogs so far, the first, Pepsi, taken far too young at only 9 and Heidi, at the ripe old age of 14. I almost lost Charlie twice last year and was in pieces both times, but he is still going strong at 14 1/2 and although I know it won't be too long before I have to go through that pain again I will NEVER be without a dog.

As all of the others have said they are worth the pain but unfortunately when you have to make the decision to pts the immense pain you feel makes you temporarily forget all the joy that they have given you. Luckily it is only temporary and slowly but surely the joy of the memories shine through and you can at least start to smile through the tears. I have had to make the decision 3 tmes and I can honestly say that if I didn't have my other dog or dogs already I don't kinow if I would have the courage to get another dog.

Thanks everyone.
I admit, I did look at Gemma in the middle of the night after we had been given the all clear and think, I cant go through it again.
The thought of going through what I did a few weeks ago fills me with dread, so...I dont think about it!!!!!!
I open the door to let them in after putting them out for a wee, and my heart skips a beat when one isnt at the door straight away. I think that the gates opened (And it happened the morning after I got Ebba!!!)  But they always come.
But then I couldnt see my life without them (although read my post on when will season end at the moment I may well reconsider ;) )
This forum is so good to vent frustraions about dogs to people who Know!!!!
The most I got from friends and family when I thought Gemma was going to die was, well she is a good age!!!! She might be and I really cat see her reaching 11, but to have everyone say it and think it will make things better was so hard :(
I dont know if any of you have this but non doggy friends and family think of dopg as just part of the furniture. Even ones that have had dogs. So lovely to come on her and have people that feel the same way as me.
Thanks again
Lea :)

I know what you mean Lea about non doggy people they say "oh I suppose you were quite attached to them but never mind you,ll be able to get another one"
That upsets me so much all our dogs are irreplacable and these people probably are well meaning but its not like going out and buying a new sofa or a pair of shoes.
My Aysha was my best mate she would have breathed for me if she could have four years later I still cry about her and yes I did go out and buy another one but the expression chalk and cheese don,t come into it I,d never find a replacement for her and I wouldn,t ever want to as she really was my special giirl. But we have to take the bad times with the good and I always have to be there and hold mine at the very end  as I think it is the final act of love and I couldn.t bear to walk away from them when their time is here they would never leave me if I was in trouble.
Its hard but once the rawness has worn of a little you remember the happy times, when Aysha had been gone about six months a mate of mine brought  a photo of Aysha in full flight over a jump the look of sheer joy on her face made me weep buckets but now I treasure that photo and my memories.
Love Sharon.

sorry you had such a scare. The dogs are with us for such a short time even if f they live a long and full life.

I went through the limbo at the vets you did when my dog was three..it was terrible... in the end my boy died. I knew if I thought about it I'd not get another dog because the pain was too great.... so I got my next dogs without thinking about the pain that will come one day.

I think it took us two years to learn to cope better with the loss and I think we never got that joy back that dogs give us before we know how short their time with us is. It still feels early days.  He was my first dog and meant so much to me.

My family they are not dog loving people and I agree they can be highly lacking in understanding. They even joked  and made a lot of nasty comments .  But dog loving people were so wonderful...they cried so much and people  didn't even know knew me came and said how sad they were and how they missed my dog and gave me bereavement cards and even gifts. For over a year people came and told me how sad they were about his loss .... people still talk about him and show me he is still a spacial boy even if we can not see him... so we know our dogs are always with us no matter what happens.... so you are right the dog loving people are so beautiful.

"They even joked  and made a lot of nasty comments ."

I had this when I lost two of my girls.  Oh well that makes fewer, jsut need to get rid of the next one, what use are they at that age, you don't show them any more etc etc.  I told my Dad just as well I didn't want him put to sleep when he had outlived his usefulness.