Have been reading thread about sad loss of Jasper (and Zico). My sympathy to you both. People have been talking about having a special bond with one dog. A "once in a lifetime dog" really. Do you think it is possible to ever really replace that dog ? I had a very special dog for 17 years and she was my first dog and the love of my life. My eyes still water at the thought of her. I recently returned a beautiful puppy to the breeder (very amicably) and couldn't undrestand why she "didn't feel right". I'm now wondering whether I will ever be able to replace my special dog and find another that "fits" me so well. We waited 4 years before getting the pup and the rest of the family couln't understand why I just couldn't take to her. The special dog was a heinz 57 so no chance of getting same type. The rest of the familly just wants another dog so I worry I may be being selfish.

My parents lost their blue roan Cocker Spaniel in august 2000 and they 'replaced' her with a black cocker in july last year. Their new dog is lovely and a really friendly dog but my dad isn't happy. She's very close in character to Bess but it's not enough.

My dad loves her to pieces but he feels as if he's just going through the motions with her - the bond just isn't there :(

Fiona

Oh I hope you are both wrong. I am awake most nights worrying about Pup and if I'll love him as he deserves. I have accepted that he isn't EVER going to be Zico, but if I've learned anything over the last few months its that you never can tell exactly how you are going to feel until you stare the situation in the face.

I feel I have no choice here. Zico is gone (:() and that's a fact. I am lonely without canine affection and that's a problem. The big difference is that you can fix problems, whereas if you try to fix something which is a fact, you finish up woofin' mad in my experience!

I will love Pup for who he is. I have no intention of measuring him against Zico (as Nina has already pointed out to me, a four-year-old Weim who is no longer here (so no longer mis-behaving ;)) will win hands down everytime if placed against a pup who is demanding, new and who I haven't 'bonded' with yet) but I'm only human. I am also prepared to take the time and effort and will not expect quick results. I know I can rely on you lot to help if I need it!

So, mixed feelings yes, but hopeful ones and happy ones are definitely winning over the sad ones. I'll keep you posted....

Linda

I too lost my Trudi to cancer last October aged 10 yrs.
But I was lucky I had two relations of hers (I never bred Trudi)
so in a daft way she still continues.
I will never ever replace Trudi, She was truly a one-in-a-million
dog. We had a special bond together, perhaps it's because she was my very first dog of my own.
However my two hooligans have certain traits which are very much like
some of Trudi's character. Especially the puppy, who was only 12 weeks old when Trudi died. I smile at the antics and the cheeky things they get upto and the reminders they give of the good times I shared with Trudi.
They never replace the dog you lose but instead they steal a little piece of your heart in exactly the same way.
Kind Regards
Kirstine

I've emailed you at home Linda, hope you don't mind.

Fiona
xxxx

Fiona,

I don't mind in the least and just as soon as I have stopped crying, I'll reply.

Thank you. I know I don't need to tell you of all people how much other people's support can mean.

Linda
xx

i lost my best dog about 18 months ago, a family member found her and gave her to us as we already had a stafford, she was about 18 months at the time. for some reason i just bonded with her as sone as i sore her, my partner did not want her but i talked him in to keeping her until we found a good home for her (and she did find a good home MINE), she got on with our puppy and our children right from the start.
after a few days came every where with us, but she sadly got a womb infection when she was about 3 and it killed her, she is now in my gardan.
we all misted her but most of all Sally mist her (other dog)(dont think that she remembered being on her own) Sally would get up in the morning and get on a chiar (she was not aloud on the chiars) and would not move, she would cry and cry. so we put out an ad looking for a nother bitch just for Sally. we had a call a few days later and this nice lady talked to me (what i thought was nice) i went to see her bitch and when i sore the dog i just did not like her, she had been mistreted and looked half starved (she said that she could not put on weight on her but showed me her other dogs and they were hugh) i only had her to get her out of that house. but because i had to realy cear for her in a few days i loved her just as much!
might of been because i had to bring her out of her self and bring her right in condistion but in the end i loved her

i think that i like John have to get another one right away makes it easyer for me!!
Bobby :)

Hi, I lost my wonderful lab 2 1/2 yrs ago to cancer and even today still miss him, I did'nt want to replace him with another black lab but my husband thought different and bought me Oscar 2 yrs ago. He will never replace Mikey but I everyday I love him a bit more, he is getting so much like my old lab in character that sometimes I forget that he is a different dog, we now have three labs but I will never forget my first one, I found that I bonded to Oscar straight away as soon as he was put in my arms I was hooked, even when five minutes before we arrived at the breeders I was still against getting another lab.

Thanks Tracy, I hope it happens that way for me too.

I found I needed to have another dog right away, but I did not really love her until she was over a year old, and it was 6 months before I stopped closing my eyes and thinking it was my first dog, only on opening them to be shocked and disappointed when I opened them.

She is now 10, and I think I really became much closer to her when she had a litter, as she was so trusting and reliant. We had a bit of a scare with her last summer, and it is likely that she has some form of cancer, but no big mass on xray (she was getting gaunt, and her enzymes were all over the place). She has been very well since I put her on a rich diet, and I sometimes stop thinking about how long she has left and just get on enjoying her! so I( do feel a bit guilty that I didn't love her as much as the first dog, but just accept things now!

I have always thought that another dog as soon as possible works for me. I've been lucky maybe in that i have had three specials. My first Lab Mandy, A natural mother to everything and a bitch who would stand no nonsence from anyone or anything! Bethany, a natural flirt who could get on with the worst tempered dogs imaginable. And of course "The Flower" The sweetest natured, most biddable dog I've ever known. These are the ones which stand out, but in their own way they have all been special and if I had the chance I would have every single one back this very minute.

A new puppy never takes the place of the one it replaces but each finds a little place in my heart all of their own.

Regards John

Right on John!

Greetings & welcome.
You have an extremely interesting question. It made me reflect quite a bit. I have to say that it depends probably on the individual. I've read everyone's post here. While I can try to understand this all encompassing love for a specific animal/individual that you mention, I'm just not the type of person who can do it. It's alien to me. I find it very limiting. I'm also not the type that believes out of 5+ billion people in the world, there is only one that exists for me. Perhaps I'm just not romantic enough.

I have loved every single dog and animal that has ever shared its life with me. I still miss them all just a tiny bit, even Snowball, the albino guinea pig I had when I was about 5 years old. She was the perfect pet & smart for her species. Her son & the female that we adopted after Snowball died, were not like her. But I still loved them. When they died, I grieved. But soon after, Lucy the hooded rat came to live with us. She was special too. She died of old age right in my hand. She even gave a gentle lick goodbye.

I can continue and name every single pet that I've ever had as a child & as an adult. But I've always realized that their time with me was limited and another critter that would need & love me just as much, would find its way into my household.

When Chienne & Samma finally head off to the happy hunting grounds, I will be devastated & grieve for them too. I can't imagine a life without them after so long...but I will have to go on. Eventually, when its time, another animal will need me too. I will love it just as much because I have so much room in myself to do this. That seems to be the cycle of my life.

Guess it's like Shakespeare a bit... "Better to have loved & lost, than never to have loved at all." Lord, it hurts, but the entire experience is worth the pain at the end. They will always be with me in my memories.
toodles

<another critter that would need & love me just as much>

That captures it for me. In the end, Pup will rely on me and need me and its that bit I know I can't resist. So whilst I do worry that I'll not be able to love him as much as Zico, I don't suppose I'd be going ahead unless I felt deep down that I could.

Can love really be measured? Or is it just "love" and that is enough? One of those philosophical questions I've always wondered about.

I know that dogs don't think of love in that way. Whatever one is willing to give, they will gladly receive without any guilt. That's why I love dogs so much. :D Cats on the other hand, depending on the individual cat, I think do actually measure amount ;)

What is an hooded rat ?

A hooded rat is a white rat with a coloured head (usually black or dark brown) and a dorsal stripe (i.e. stripe down its back!) of the same colour.

And they don't have the albino red eyes that many all white rats have. Spooky, especially at night

In my case no never, My bulldog after having her for 12 years she is in my heart forever, and she is buried in my garden. Each year a new plant is put on the place she is resting ,and I still talk to her photo she was a real old cow as well [lol]

Patricia

Maybe the dog being a heinz 57 is a good thing- sometimes (I personally think so don't shoot me anyone;)) it's better to get a totally different breed of dog as you may end up being one of those people who are constantly trying to bring back (so to speak) you're old dog My other half had a black lab who they all totally adored- so much so that they paid for cremation on his own and the ashes are in a wooden engraved box- he actually said that to have a black lab he'd constantly be trying to re-create 'Buster' and try to get him to do the same things- this wouldn't happen with a different breed! It's not the same for everyone of course- I'm just trying to imply that this may help. Or if you tried going to a rescue centre as some of the dogs there have a very sad story to tell and this might be what captures your heart first off? Another reason for me thinking that this may be a good idea is that the dog comes complete with his/her own character therefore you wouldn't be trying to shape the character of a puppy to your dog that you lost!

This is quite hard for me as I know what it is I want to say- it just doesn't seem to be coming into words very good- I hope you can tell what I'm trying to say. And all of you remember that what I'm saying is in some cases- not all! I do really feel for you and hope that you soon feel better/come to terms with the whole matter:)

Linda (Zicos Mum)- obviously the above doesn't mean you- some particular breeds are just suited to certain people (lifestyle etc) and this is more the case with yourself. I don't want to worry you or anything- see what I mean by different things suit different people and as some people said earlier on in this thread- no one knows how they'd react until it effects them personally;) (Like I said -I know what I want to say- it's finding the right words!)

Stacey

P.S; Heard anything yet re your pup?

Stacey,

Don't worry, I know what you mean! And I know how hard you're trying not to upset anyone - and its worked with me, I'm not upset! :)

I'm afraid Weims are a bit addictive, in my case at least. They are not the easiest of dogs, but then they are so rewarding that you put up with the 'challenges' that they bring for the sake of the other stuff. Pup will fill a huge gap in my life. I'm prepared that it won't be all plain sailing (for me or him) but I am determined that it'll work. I already love him and I don't know which one he is from the pictures I have! I intend to bring him up in memory of Zico and the fun we shared, but not in the shadow of Zico, nor in the image of him. Hope that makes sense?

Pup is growing as fast as he knows how, I sent a camera off today so I should have lots of photos of him growing up. I'm trying not to 'bug' Jean as she has 7 other expectant parents to cope with, as well as 8 pups, 7 grown-up dogs and one husband, and I know at least one of the other 'parents' is dying for information just as much as me!!!
:)

Hi, I don't think you ever replace your favourite dog but that the next dog takes its own place. I knew that when I replaced one x bearded collie with another, I felt for a long time that the new one was not as special until she was involved in a road traffic accident and then all the emotions and feelings came flooding to the top and I knew I would be just as devastated. Not the way anyone wants to find out I guess but true nonetheless. Molly incidentally is fine now

I agree with most of the previous postings. I knew I'd never find another dog like Sam, but I missed the company of a dog so much. When we got Tess and she was such a different character, I thought we'd made a mistake but she won me round with her sweet nature. Now we have a second dog (Tess's daughter) and again I couldn't love her more, but for different reasons again. I still think of Sam with the fondest memories, but I'm so happy and so glad I didn't deny myself the company of dogs. They ask so little of us, and give us so much in return.
Lorna

The most wonderful dog I ever owned, a choc lab, died almost 5 years ago now, aged 14 and still raises a tear when I think of her. Its only recently I have been able to bring myself to wash the curtains in the living room that she used to lie against - I went to wash them some time after she died, noticed her hairs on them, and promptly re-hung them. I couldn't bear to "wash them away". I have ummed and aahhed ever since as to whether or not to have another lab - I cant use the word replace, because SHE could never be replaced. I had better make up my mind soon, as it wont be long before I am too long in the tooth to manage a big boisterous puppy. We shall see. I love all my dogs, but she was the most special somehow, and I dont think any dog I own now or in the future would ever mean quite as much to me. Where's the kleenex, sniffle sniffle.

Have just read your message and my heart goes out to you. I too had a "once in a lifetime dog", Toby, he was a sprollie and sadly suddenly became ill last April which unfortunately ended with us having him put to sleep on 10th May. I thought I would die of a broken heart and when people said immediately afterwards "are you going to get another dog" I could have hit them. I couldn't imaging "replacing" Toby - in my opinion nothing could come close. However the weeks following our loss I couldn't bear the emptiness in the house, I was amazed at how much I used to talk to him when my husband was away and I was sooooooo lonely. I needed another "friend". Alas it was the time of the foot and mouth outbreaks and being in the Channel Islands there were no dogs allowed to be imported from UK, so I was forced to wait until the end of July. I wanted to re-home a dog and my only request was that it had some collie in it. I was presented with a beautiful border collie called Zac who actually seemed to need me more than I needed him. He was so affectionate and it was a real blessing to have "someone" to talk about Toby to (telling him he would have loved him and although he will never replace him, he was going to be loved just as much). Anyway I digress. All was going well although I found Zac a bit clingy but in hindsight it meant I couldn't ignore him or his needs and I now realise he is every bit as much loved as Toby was but is a different character. I did have feelings of guilt when I realised I hadn't thought about Toby for a week, but my Mum and Dad said that Toby would be glad I'd given another dog as good a home as he had, and that was a comfort.

Then lo and behold at the end of October I was asked by the owner of a 4 month old black cocker spaniel called "Toby" if I would take him on as she didn't have the time to dedicate to him. Well you can imagine, I thought it must have been fate (kind of like Toby1 reborn) and I couldn't resist. So now I have two friends, both of whom I love with all my heart and they have healed my broken heart. I have framed pictures of Toby1 and I still talk to him and apologise for not visiting his grave, but deep down I know he was happy for the 12 years we had him and he was grateful we didn't let him go on in pain and not understanding why he suddenly couldn't run like the wind anymore.

Don't give up hope - when the right "character" comes along, you'll know if it's right. Remember your lost pet with affection and know that he would have wanted you to love again like you did with him - it's the best you can give.

Time heals............................. puppies heal faster!!!!!

Take care and hope everything becomes clear.

Fran (and Zak and Toby2)

Hi Fran - would a Sprollie be a Springe rx Collie? I have one at the moment and she is such a smart cookie <G> (Funily enough, my name is also Fran) I think I'm going to miss her terribly when she's gone as she's been my perfick dog...... :-(

Fran

Hi Fran,

Yes Toby1 was a springer cross collie and very intelligent and full of beans right up to the age of 12 when we lost him. They are a great cross, but actually quite hard to find as rescue dogs, we tried in July last year and couldn't find one anywhere. We now have a collie and a cocker spaniel - not quite the same but absolutely both adorable.

Fran