My brother wanted to buy my car we sold it to him for $500 but was not going to give it to him till he paid for it. Then my mom decides to call me and say that he will pay me by then end of March this was march 15. If not she'll pay for it. Fine he has paid half and my mom ended up footing the rest of the bill, but my bro does not know that. SO I'm calling him and asking him where my money is since it is now the middle of April, he has had his tax refund and acts like he hasn't, has money for everything else. Now I'm suppose to try and get this money out of him so my mom can get her money back. He has moved into an apartment with his girlfriend has paid a month in advance but still no money for me.

I asked my mom if she has learned a lesson here, she said yes. But I know her she'll hand him money again. She is all ready paying for his computer that he is suppose to be paying for. Just ridiculous. he has moved out and moved back home more then I can count, I told her to change the locks and let him see what life is all about and to stop bailing him out. He still has keys to her house and goes home when he needs food or what ever else he needs. She really has to cut the cord :( and so does he :(

What do you think I should do, he won't answer my phone calls?
I'm going to e-mail him. His girlfriend I have never met her but she has pissed my sister and I off when on chat on msn she acts like she is him, how imature is that. Sorry just had to vent :(

I have a BIL who is exactly the same.  They won't change.  :(  He's been getting bailed out of financial situations since he's been a kid, at 31, with a wife, home and dog (and no job may I add!), my FIL still funds him.  He expects it because it's what has happened all his life.  Maybe best not to get me started on this subject dollface ...

Realistically, I don't think there's anything you can do.  Just make sure it's not you he's sponging off.

Ha........ you've seen nothing, my b.i.l. is a bl**dy nightmare, has cost me, his Mum & everyone else in the family thousands :(

Geoff

It's so annoying though Geoff.  I've no idea how many arguments and fall outs have started because of him.  I'm sure you will understand even if my OH doesn't!  I'm always told that my BIL doesn't know any better ... well he should LEARN!  He's 31 not a child!!!!  Oh look, you've started me off now!

This is where the benefits of being an only child come in!  :)

Simone (getting off her soapbox)

Tell me about it.... a few years ago I sold my Toyota Landcruiser (which was 4 months old), to pay off his debts, the bank were going to repossess his house, I felt sorry for him...

Oh & his wife hasn't spoke to me since !!!

Geoff

What a nice person you are Geoff, there's no way I'd do that.  Although my OH probably would. 

I hope you've learnt and won't be tempted next time your BIL and his ungrateful wife need something.  Let them go out and earn the money they need, just like the rest of us do!

Simone (trying to dismantle soapbox, unsuccessfully obviously!)

My brothers like that a compleate waste of space. He will borrow money and not pay it back, Last time i lent him money He needed petrol to get to work & i felt sorry for him. Then he had the nerve to ask for more after continually saying he would pay me back and never did So that was a NO Its hard to say no but in the end the only way they are going to learn is for people not to bail them out. He got in to a lot of debt that we couldn't help with and he had to sell his house to pay it off. But i still don't think he has learned so now we let him get himself out of his problems. Yes we are there for him if he needs us but not in the money sense as he has got to learn that he needs to work for it and save for those rainy days like the rest of us do.

I have to confess my mother has always bailed my brother out and so have I.  But over the years when he got himself straight he has paid my mum back and recently when Luis cleared the house out he bought me a TV and mugs and teaspoons.  Why he took teasspoons I will never know. When I go out for the evening with him he always pays,  he has a heart of gold and is a very special part of my family.

It's nice that your brother is like that and you have a good relationship with him Emma.  I'd really like things to be different for us and I do try, but I seem to be the only one trying!  And then I hear how he's just taken another few thousand pounds off my FIL or how my FIL's trying to get him jobs with people.  He's so unreliable, I wouldn't recommend him to anyone.  How embarrassed would my FIL be when he lets yet more people down.

hmmm your brother sounds like my uncle...

dollface's brother, not emma's !

I feel Im quite lucky to be honest,  we have a very good relationship. He always asks me to go shopping with him and then takes me to dinner.  If ever I need advice he gives excellent advise.  My father walked out when we were little and he has tried to be a father a brother and my best friend. We haven't had a cross word in over 13 years,  yes we have discussed things but never shouted at each other. We have complete and utter respect for each other and totally respect each others views and feelings. He would make somebody a lovely husband (obviously with my approval).
I would find it very frustrating if I had a brother that could not be financially responsible. With the nerve to scrounge off of other family members at such an age.  But at the end of the day if you give them an inch they will take a mile.  You can't choose your family but you can choose your friends.
Emma x

I pretty much raised my bro when I was little, he use to call me mommy. My sister and I have the same dad but he passed away when I was 8 months old :( never got to know him, but his parents raised my sister and I until I was 6 (they were like my parents I love them very much, my grandpa passed away when I was 8 on my b.day. My grandma just 2 years ago and I'm still dealing with that). My mom met the man she is with now and had my bro, and well her man never much cared for us when his son came around...Long storey.....My bro when he got older thought it was funny to through stuff at us, hit us, you name it to get us hit or whatever....Thats little kids. As he got older I was his best friend again and I taught him how to ride a bike and throw a football and he played in highschool all because we always played together he said, and proud that I taught him.....My hubby sold him good speakers for his car cause he kept bugging him, sold them for pretty cheap damn good speakers and haven't seen a penny...he would come over just to use our computer cause he couldn't afford the net- go figure mother is paying for his computerm over 3 grand...I got his old one cause he told mother it was broken so she gave it to me-how nice-then I told her all we did was plug it in...lol :D he just wanted a new computer..She still hasn't learned. They have payed him to do painting that he still has not done over a year ago. My mom has to hide her bank card cause he steals it and takes money out.....When are they ever going to learn----Never cause thats his child...Then again she gives my older sister money and know's she will NEVER get it back---me well I'm a different storey I hardly ever borrow cause I don't like too and I always pay back, she also borrows off me and pays me back. She says the reason why she is like that with me is because I'm more mature and more responsible and she doesn't have to worry about me in that way :( ...My hubby also got him the job that he has now, he hired him 3 times and the 3rd time he actually stuck around-he's still there, hubby has since moved to a new job :) better pay but alot more hours.

My mom told me to lay off bugging him cause thats what my brother told her to say , I said well why doesn't he just call me, e-mail me or something...Really ticked me off, this will be the last favor he will ever get from me ever...and he wanted me to let him move in, boy he's funny :D think I'll just leave it up to her to get the money when really its hers in the first place....Hope he realizes he just burned one bridge one to many times...maybe I'll get a call today cause his SGI check is suppose to be in due to the many car accidents he has been in...We will see...

I'll stop now cause I could go on for ever :( :D