can you buy something that will make someone who is in the start of dementia  remember tablets,

my mum forgets she has tablets to take, she is supposed to take certain tablets at certain times of the day
and she forgets and then she gets upset when she remembers she has forgotton them,

or sometimes she does not remember taking them and then not to sure if she has taken them
and will then retake them,

i am looking for something maybe with an alarm that will give her a jolt to remember the tablets,

looking for something that will speak and say tablets take them now, something she may only have to set once and will
do itself for a week and then i can ring her and say reset your tablet alarm,

i do not want to ring her every day to remind her to take her tablets as she gets very upset at this
as she knows she is losing bits of her memory, my dad tries his best to remind her but she gets upset
at him for nagging as she puts it,

we all know she is not well but we all want to help her keep as much of her independance as much as
possible any ideas on what to do,

pill pots are know good as she will just look at them like she does her meds and forget to either take them or fill them

any ideas please

Is something like this any good?

The doctor can arrange for the pills to be put in a box with compartments for each day and time of day they are large about a foot square so if left by the kettle or something like that would be difficult to forget also if you can't remember if you have taken your tablets you only have to look and if they are there you have not taken them.

There are quite a few at the bottom of the page which also look good too JG.. I never knew these existed..

The boxes with seperate days,times etc don't do it as they forget their days etc.  The only way that we can get dad to remember whenhe's having a bad time is to tell him.

Wow, I've seen the boxes with compartments before but they didn't have alarms back when Granny could have done with them, those are brilliant!

My Dad waqs like this when he first started with Altzimers. It mattered not that the tablets were in a box with the times and days on as he just could not relate the days and times to real life. I had to go and give them to him if I wanted him to have them as prescribed and this is not always possible. It got to the point where he would only take the ones he liked the colour of...and take all of that colour and no others. I do not think there is anything that will really work. Unfortunatly I think your Dad will have to administer then to be sure she has them at the right times. My Dad lived alone and this was not an option. Much as I tried my Dad just did not take then properly and eventually this was instumental in his having to go into hospital and eventually a home. He was a lot worse (By the sound of it) than your Mum so I hope you can get it sorted out. Dad was in the home for 18 months before I lost him. He had Altzimers with Lewy bodies, a very fast deteriorating form and instead of a gradual deterioration he went down in huge steps. It was an awfull time and so very hard to deal with. I hope your Mum has a better time. With your Dad at home to help it should be a totally different story for her. I think you must try and make your Dad understand that he will have to take the resposibility for her tablet administration. He will have to harden himself to her "Nagging" digs and just make sure she has her medication anyway.
I hope you can work it out for her. I know a little of what it is like. {{{{hugs}}}}
Aileen

This sounds like what we were faced with Christmas Day. MIL had a tray of tablets in front of her but couldn't relate what time of day/or what day it was, difficult when she had breakfast/midday,teatime & eveing doses. She had decided that round paracetamol tablets were harder to swallow so left them in place & took capsules instead. (I was very concerned that taking 8 per day every day was what was making her comatose for most of the day).TBH unless your Mum is supervised I don't know what the answer is. My friend had to hide her Dad's tablets & go round to dose him up otherwise he would take the lot in one go.

I have just read your posts and just want to send hugs to all of you who are trying to deal with a family memeber or friend with this dreadfull condition such a difficult thing to live with.

> i do not want to ring her every day to remind her to take her tablets as she gets very upset at this as she knows she is losing bits of her memory, my dad tries his best to remind her but she gets upset at him for nagging as she puts it,

Very sadly, this is how my mum's starting to behave. She too gets very upset at forgetting things and irritated with me reminding her - but of course I HAVE to remind her about some things - then she forgets again. And just recently, her sense of smell and taste has gone, which is upsetting her greatly. It's going to be even more difficult when I move out, as she doesn't want me living here long-term.

Just come back from m-i-l's who takes 12 tablets a day, if she remembers. I am trying to explain to her that the ulcers on her legs will not heal if she does not take the extra 4 antibiotics a day, but she won't.
At 84 years old and widowed last year she is just giving up which is very difficult for the rest of us. She is very forgetful, breathless and keeps falling. We will be having a family meeting in the New Year to discuss the options but I know she won't agree to residential care. It's very frustrating and please don't get me started on "social services!"- it appears that all the things we thought they were paying for all their lives have been done away with!  

To the OP & Karen:

my MIL, also widowed & 84) is 'lucky' that she gets carers in 3 times a day arranged by social services as she has had several falls. I think they can monitor drug taking, help with making meals etc. At present this is what is keeping my MIL out of a home and all her family are against the idea anyway, (that in itself is a minefield).

On Christmas day we had to insist she used her walking frame but she never does in her own home.

Thank you WolfieStruppi. It is very difficult to know the right way to go.When we left today my husband looked quite affected by the way she had been. We have managed to get a cleaner, that we pay for once a week and have a visit from the physiotherapist in the New Year who knows she is not using the aids she has been left.

We want to do the best for her and respect her dignity/wishes.

The ideas below all look useful but in the meantime, if she has a mobile phone, you could set several recurring alarms on that. I have done this for a friend of mine, so far so good.
Jeff.

My mum has a recurring alarm on her mobile phone, its a voice message form my grandaughter (her great grandaughter ) saying Grandma its tablet time.

i have ordered the  pill box with alarm on,

my mum is just 62 her dad went the same way at he went down hill very quickly,
her brother is 57 and cannot be left alone at all, he forgets to put the gas out
leaves the water running for a bath and walks away and leaves it,

she knows she is not well and has looked into dignitas, she has not mentioned
it for a while now so not sure if she has done anything about it.

i have told my dad if things get to the point he can't manage he must let me know
at themoment he said things are ok, but he said she talks about people that are not
hear any more as though she had just spoke to them about 5 mins ago.

she can't remember what she needs from the shops so takes a list with her, that is no good either
as sometimes she can't put the note with the item so beans she looks at the list and looks at the shelves and
she will bring soup back.

the thing that upsets her most is she knows it is happening and she sits there and tells me there is nothing
she can do and that upsets her the most not being able to control it, and before it started happening to her
she saw her father and brother have it so knows what is comming.

please don't get me started on "social services!"- it appears that all the things we thought they were paying for all their lives have been done away with!

not true. you can get help from social services but only if they cant do 'personal care' if they can wash and dress they cant get help
it is also means tested so if you have the money, im afraid you have to pay
i work for the nhs and must say im in two minds as to whether people should pay or not, it seems very unfair that people who worked hard and bought their own home etc have to pay for their care, including selling their houses but someone who didnt work and was on benefits and rented property, get care for free
i think it should be equal for everyone

Tina S, don't mean to hijack the thread but you have quoted what I have said, so will explain.
I have been told by Berkshire Social services ( and I am no pushover) that they do not do home help, so we pay.
They do not have district nurses so we have to ask for the voluntary car service twice a week to the surgery to have her legs dressed, for which we pay. We have to pay for a panic alarm.
Every time I ring them I speak to a different social worker ( most of whom sound about 14!) who will only give their first name and you never speak to them again,so you have to explain it from scratch.

Before my father in law passed away I tried to arrange transport for them to go to the hospital for chemo, he was 85 and blind and was told he should get a bus, so I have not had great experiences from them.

Mum will not be able to cope much longer, she will fight us if we try to put her in a nursing home or sheltered accomodation as she wants to keep her property for which they worked all their lives and give us some money...... all we want is that she is safe and treated with respect.

I can back this up. My MIL (although I'm not married to OH) had a stroke and is now registered disabled,
loss use of left arm, limited/no vision in one eye and has to walk with a stick as her left leg doesn't work properly either or needs to use a wheel chair if its long distances. She's in her early 50's and has diabetes which is what lead to her stroke as she too forgot to take tablets etc.

She lives in Reading area, she has to pay for the 'carers' that come in to wash her and help her get dressed in the morning every day.
She isn't a 'rich' person and lives on social payments, a very small pension think it's less than £60 a month
as her husband died when he was young.
Not sure if she has to pay for the 'readibus' that takes her to and from the day centre she visits twice a week.

It's certainly a minefield and one which I am now undergoing with my Mum who will turn 65 in 2011.
It's hard as neither myself or my sister live near to her and she's on the IOW so not cheap to be able to visit
her often either.
My Dad (divorced from my mum) is also my Nan's carer she's 93yo and they don't get much help at the moment either.
Something which is currently under review as they are being assessed as to what my Nan needs.

Certainly not easy on ones family especially if you dont have the funds to help or get the care your relative needs.

Hope everyone has medical evidence of "dementia etc".  Thought that my dad was beginning with Alzeimer's but it was actually that he'd had a number of mini strokes.

We also thought that Social Services would be of no help as every time my parents tried to get some services they were told that they weren't entitled to it due to their savings and that they would have to pay for everything.  Since my mum has come out of hospital after her cancer treatment Social Services staff at Christies have been fantastic and they've really helped enormously.

Thankfully, in Scotland, we have free personal care. I know that is no help to some posters here but just wanted to point out the difference in Scotland in case some readers think the same applies here :)

> Thankfully, in Scotland, we have free personal care.

So much for a United Kingdom!

My mother moved from Berkshire to live with my sister in Glocs the difference in care and support for her and my sister as her carer is amazing!